on marriage?
i was just surfing thru my friendster since i'm still half awake and catching up on friend entries on livejournal, god knows how much of my lj-friends' lives i've missed in the past 2 months, that hey, a lot of people who i grew up with, and people born in the same year as me, have all started to get married! and here i am getting detached emotionally. strange how life works its ways on people. in high school, most of the friends who are married or about to get married, were the very ones who told me, they don't wanna get married that early, or haven't found the love of their lives, but also the fear of marriage for some others because of their family backgrounds and today, many of them are happily married. one of my best friends in secondary school; we used to be a click of three by the way; and now one of them's happily married to a guy totally different from what she thought she wanted and has 2 kiddos now. she was the one who's always not have any bfs, refused to date, and was looking for boys for me and our other bestie but she never could hold her interest on that one person for long enough to make him interested. the other one doesn't seem to far off from the marriage tracks as well.
on the other hand, many of my friends think that i'll be the first of the lot to settle down because i've dated quite a couple guys, and well, seemed to go in that direction. but instead, now i've seem to retract slowly back into the shell of comfort. as i see couples get married blissful and all, i also see some of my friends who's gotten married early get divorced. then i stop and think to myself, should i put myself or my family through it all? i've never really made right decisions in the past. in fact, i've caused my mom so much heartache if people around me knew, i would have been tortured to death on the mere verdict that i was unfilial. so at this point, all i want to do is to make up to my mom as much as i can because now, i should have enough brains to draw the lines between what's right and wrong. prolly it's because of this that i try to steer clear of relationship conversations with her because i don't want her to worry un duly and by keeping it from her, she thinks i choose what i want to tell her. =.= but nevertheless, on the point of marriage, i think a lot of these things are drawn together by fate and is pretty much unavoidable. and i wanna wish the people around me who are about to tie the knot, my sincere blessings of endless strength and love to make it work both as couples in love and as a newly-formed family unit.
on the other hand, many of my friends think that i'll be the first of the lot to settle down because i've dated quite a couple guys, and well, seemed to go in that direction. but instead, now i've seem to retract slowly back into the shell of comfort. as i see couples get married blissful and all, i also see some of my friends who's gotten married early get divorced. then i stop and think to myself, should i put myself or my family through it all? i've never really made right decisions in the past. in fact, i've caused my mom so much heartache if people around me knew, i would have been tortured to death on the mere verdict that i was unfilial. so at this point, all i want to do is to make up to my mom as much as i can because now, i should have enough brains to draw the lines between what's right and wrong. prolly it's because of this that i try to steer clear of relationship conversations with her because i don't want her to worry un duly and by keeping it from her, she thinks i choose what i want to tell her. =.= but nevertheless, on the point of marriage, i think a lot of these things are drawn together by fate and is pretty much unavoidable. and i wanna wish the people around me who are about to tie the knot, my sincere blessings of endless strength and love to make it work both as couples in love and as a newly-formed family unit.