wannabe patriot
Grace helped me fulfill one of my childhood dreams by bringing me for the NDP this year. I know I’m not the most patriotic of Singaporeans - I scoff at a lot of government initiatives, dismissing them as propaganda, and I constantly whine about the rigidity of Singaporean society - but for some reason the idea of attending arguably the most patriotic event of the year appeals to me very much. I suppose it really stems down to something that my dad and I were discussing the other day - that though we are rather critical of Singapore’s system of doing many things, ultimately we’re extremely proud to be citizens of such a successful tiny island nation. We may sometimes criticise the constant usage of the phrase, “look how far we have come”, but that most definitely does not mean that we don’t recognise and applaud our nation’s astounding achievements until now.
I suppose the reason that my favourite National Day song is Home, aside from that it has a really lovely melody, is that the lyrics really speak to me. At the risk of sounding like a complete cliche, I will admit that I have constantly questioned the concept of a home. Let’s look at the house that I live in - it’s in a nice neighbourhood and it’s value has appreciated a lot in years. But to be quite honest, I don’t really consider the physical 1 600 square metres to be my home. It’s the people within it that make me truly feel like this is my home. On days that I am alone at home, I treasure the serenity. But it is when a family member comes back that I start feeling…the life in this apartment (for lack of a better phrase), and a certain feeling that makes me proud to say, “I am at home here.”
No, I didn’t go on about my house for nothing. I mean to come back to the song and say that I feel that Kit Chan’s totally got it right when she sings, “There is comfort in the knowledge / that home’s about it’s people too”. The references to the river could not be any more spot on as well. Even though I know that these references are meant to refer to how our ancestors made their living from and lived off the Singapore River last time, the Kallang River in my neighbourhood has an importance in my life too - I’ve gone there to clear my mind countless times, and more significantly, I’ve brought people who mean something to me there as well to see if they see the same beauty in the river and city line as I do. Truth be told, it’s gotten harder to view the river as a place of comfort as I think I might have shared my favourite spot too many times that I can’t help but associate it with certain memories that can either make me smile or feel sad. Even then, there’s one thing that I know for sure: This will not stop me from coming back. I used to feel a certain sense of calmness here, and I still do. So screw those memories, no one can take my river away from me.
Similarly I may be a complain queen about life in Singapore, but ultimately I do love this tiny island. I’ve had 18 pretty good years here kept safe and sound, and it’s unlikely that I will ever leave here (ie migrate) unless love compels me to.
So here’s to you Singapore. You and your annoying but generally effective policies, education system that has put me through almost 12 years of hell but I’m going to emerge knowing that I’m ready to face tertiary education, but most importantly here’s to the people here that have been a part of my short 18 years of existence so far. Happy 46th Birthday, my dear red passport :)
I can be so cheesy when I want to hehe.
(In other news: I really want to sit in a chinook helicopter, a tank, and fire a machine gun. Which means that I am so going to hit the air force, army and navy open houses next year.)