Echoes - SPN
Story Title: Echoes
Character/Relationships: Sam, Dean, Adam
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Language, Spoilers 05x22
Summary: Coming back, it's hard for Sam to remember any of the good things.
Author's Notes: This was writen for spn_las Round 1 Challenge 2, the prompt was "Lost moments".
Post Date: September 14, 2010
Sam can see that look in their eyes that says he should know the importance of this. He should understand the meaning of a cherry black 67’ Chevy Impala. If Adam gets it, he should. Especially with the way Dean lets his fingers glide just barely over the hood of the engine but he just doesn’t. It’s another one of those things he lost on his way back up.
“Come on, Sammy.” Dean grumbles. There’s a flash of something across his eyes that has Sam turning away and Adam groaning.
“Dude, he’s trying. You gotta just give it some time.” Sam always hated that it was the little brother who came to his rescue, who understood what he was going through.
“How can he not remember her? He remembered how to take apart, clean and reassemble a gun. He understood what holy water, salt and silver was for. He remembered-“ Dean stopped with a cough and took off in the opposite direction. Dean left Adam standing next to the Impala as a buffer between himself and Sam. Adam let out a wild kick to the front tire when Sam headed for a place to sit and clear his mind.
“Fucking Winchesters, why I ever wanted to be a part of this? I will never know.” Adam grumbled before following Sam and sitting next to the still broken hunter. “You want me to tell you about it or do you want to figure it out in your own time?”
“I remember it from a wreck. It shouldn’t be drivable.” Sam spoke softly like they had gotten used to him doing. “Another bad thing to add to the list of things I remember. I just want to remember something good for once, Adam.”
“Believe me I know.” Adam bumped shoulders with Sam, “Dean’s just pissed that you remembered me before him. I guess that should say something.”
“I still don’t remember him.” Sam wiped at the corners of his eyes before he focused across the space separating him and Dean. “Fuck. I can barely think half of the time because I keep getting flashes of what I think are memories and they’re just really horrible things that I’ve done. But I can’t remember a car that’s supposed to mean something and I can’t remember my own brother.”
Adam followed Sam’s gaze and let out a long sigh, “You ever think that maybe there’s a reason why you don’t remember him yet, Sam?”
“I’m being punished.”
Adam gave Sam a look that said, you’re a gigantic moron before he started talking, “No, princess. All these memories you’re getting back so far are bad. They’re the only ones you’re getting. So there’s a reason you don’t remember him or that fucking car. I think it’s because you loved him and he wasn’t anything bad to you. He was and still is the best thing in your life.”
“That sounds pretty shitty saying you were a bad memory.” Sam tried to pull away from how serious everything had gotten.
“Well I was a ghoul and tried to drain you and maybe eat you.” Adam scratched his head and went with it. “Sounds like a bad time to me.”
Sam shoved Adam over and smirked, “Thanks, man.”
“Right, so now that sharing and caring is over I just have one more thing to say before we had back over to the doom and gloom.”
“What?”
“You’ll remember him Sam. When I first met you-“
“Don’t,” Sam stopped Adam. He needed to remember Dean on his own.
“I get to say this,” Adam growled, “You were attached to the hip. You don’t forget a love like that. You have something like that forever no matter what you’ve gone through. So just give it time.”
“I hope I remember him,” Sam admitted watching Dean pacing back and forth waiting for them to hurry up and get back to the car. “It’s like its right there, echoes of it. I can feel it and sometimes if we’re in the right spots or places it’s like I can reach out and I’m right there. Like everything will come rushing back in.”