Shima Shima (can't sleep at night)
I feel like I'm not really living, I'm just sitting there watching other people pass by and live their lives.
They fall in love, get hurt, get married, have kids, experience joy, and pain. And... I'm just sitting at the side, with my nose buried in a book, or a drama, or a game.
Everything around me is changing, but I don't move. I'm just...there.
So I try to change, too. But still, I'm not really living. I'm still just...there.
Which is why Japanese dramas fascinate and confuse me. In 3 short months, several characters' lives change. My life just stays the same.
Well, now, I've made some changes. Major ones, but... well, until the next step happens, I'm just...back where I was around 6 years ago. Doing nothing.
I liked being busy. It was stressful, but I felt useful. Now... I don't know. I need to get busy again, or I'll sink into another pit.
I have a deadline for myself. If it still doesn't happen, then I'll have to look in another place.
I'm not sure what my dream is. I'm not sure if having a dream would help or harm at this point.
I'll just have to keep going, and hope for the best.
They fall in love, get hurt, get married, have kids, experience joy, and pain. And... I'm just sitting at the side, with my nose buried in a book, or a drama, or a game.
Everything around me is changing, but I don't move. I'm just...there.
So I try to change, too. But still, I'm not really living. I'm still just...there.
Which is why Japanese dramas fascinate and confuse me. In 3 short months, several characters' lives change. My life just stays the same.
Well, now, I've made some changes. Major ones, but... well, until the next step happens, I'm just...back where I was around 6 years ago. Doing nothing.
I liked being busy. It was stressful, but I felt useful. Now... I don't know. I need to get busy again, or I'll sink into another pit.
I have a deadline for myself. If it still doesn't happen, then I'll have to look in another place.
I'm not sure what my dream is. I'm not sure if having a dream would help or harm at this point.
I'll just have to keep going, and hope for the best.