show me the sidestreets in your life (mark/eduardo, chris/dustin) (part 1/2)
fic: show me the sidestreets in your life
fandom: the social network
pairing: mark/eduardo, kind of chris/dustin
notes: the cracky lack-of-verbal-filters fic. (prompt here). AKA the one where they act out a john mayer song ("Say", not "Your Body is A Wonderland". Well, maybe a little bit.)
i didn't feel the need to post this because i got so much wonderful and sweet feedback on the meme but i've had people ask me to archive stuff SO so so! i will post it here! suuuper late!
one year anniversary! aw! this fandom, man.
oh and title is matt and kim!
----
Dustin yawns, coming awake slowly. He pulled a half-nighter last night and his entire brain hurts because CS 220 can suck his dick.
He scratches his stomach, noting idly that he'd fallen asleep with a porn video half-loaded, and he laughs, stands up to get some food. Mark's sleeping in the library and Chris is always out of bed early, doing God knows what, so Dustin's all alone. Breakfast and a morning jerk-off session sounds perfect.
He pushes open the door and Chris is sitting on the couch.
"What's up, man?" Chris says, looking up from a thick hard-covered book, face distracted. Dustin inwardly rolls his eyes.
"I wanted to jerk off and now you're here and I can't without being weird," Dustin says, and throws a hand over his mouth, eyes going huge.
Chris is staring at him like he can't quite believe that just happened. Dustin can't believe that just happened. What the fucking fuck.
"What did you just say?" Chris says, face pink, and Dustin says, "I said I want to jerk off but-" he puts his hand back over his mouth and shakes his head.
"That's what I thought," Chris says faintly, and then- "And it's not like we don't hear you anyway, Dustin, you make this really strange noise when you're about to come."
He puts both hands over his mouth in horror and they are staring at each other with their hands on their mouths and it is so fucking ridiculous Dustin nearly sobs with laughter.
Dustin tentatively lifts his hand and tries to say, "Whoa, man, what the fuck is happening," and instead says, "You listen when I'm coming?"
"Sometimes," Chris says. "If I'm bored. Once I listened while I was jerking off in my bed and it was really weird- oh fucking shit!"
His eyes go huge and scared and Dustin snorts out a terrified laugh.
"I have no clue what's going on," he says, and Chris nods, lips clamped tightly shut.
"I can't believe I just said that," Chris says weakly, and Dustin laughs again.
"Where- is Mark here?"
"I hope not," Chris says, and screws up his face in shock at his own words. "He's so fucking irritating in the mornings."
"He's always irritating," Dustin says. "Do you know he's been drinking your orange juice? Straight from the carton."
"Well, once I blew a guy on his bed, so, we're even," Chris says, and his face goes bright red. Dustin cracks up.
"What?"
"We were really drunk and I accidentally went into Mark's room and thank fuck he wasn't there and, I don't know, I just really wanted to blow him," Chris says, and buries his face in the couch and moans, "Oh God Dustin, what the fuck is happening-"
"That's kind of hot," Dustin says, and Chris looks at him in terror and says, "I need to leave," and stands up and slams the door behind him.
He's not even wearing shoes. Dustin opens the door and Chris is sitting on the floor in the hallway, shell-shocked.
"Come back inside," Dustin says. "I'm sorry, man."
"I'm the one who just said I blew a guy in Mark's room-" Chris says, voice choky.
"It's not like I didn't know you were gay, Chris, plus I saw you hooking up with that lacrosse dude on our couch when you thought everyone was out of the suite-"
"Oh my God you saw that?!" Chris screeches, and Dustin is starting to find this really hilarious.
"Man, you kind of have a reputation."
"I just like hooking up!" Chris yells, and his face is boiling red. "It's not like I fuck around! I've only even fucked one guy!"
"Holy shit," Dustin says dazedly, and Chris looks like he might actually expire from shame. He falls sideways onto the floor, clutching his knees, and Dustin leans against the doorjamb and nearly cries with laughter.
He looks through teary eyes at the hallway and Mark is stumbling up the stairs.
"The fuck is going on," Mark mumbles, backpack slung over one shoulder, deep circles around his eyes, and Dustin just points at Chris and cracks up again.
"Chris is telling me all about his dirty sexual exploits," Dustin says, and Chris waves a hand at Mark, face still mashed into the floor.
"Chris is kind of a slut," Mark says, and Dustin sees a flash of shock go over his face at the unexpected words. Huh. Who knew Mark actually had a filter?
"You fucking asshole, you're just a jealous virgin," Chris says, and then, "Mark, shit, no, I didn't mean it-"
"I hate being a virgin," Dustin says, and feels his cheeks heat. Mark looks at him, mouth tight, eyes angry.
"What the fuck is going on?" he demands. "This has to be Dustin's fault, everything's your fault."
"That's not true, I'm not the one who broke your PSP, it was Wardo-"
Oh shit, Dustin had promised to never tell anyone that.
"Well I don't care what Wardo does," Mark says, and his cheeks go pink. Dustin's mouth falls open.
"We all think you like him," Chris says from the floor, and Mark spins quickly on his heel and pushes in the open door. Dustin and Chris stare at each other.
"He totally wants to fuck Wardo," Dustin whispers.
"Or maybe he wants Wardo to fuck him," Chris suggests, and licks his lips. Dustin is becoming seriously in awe of this version of Chris. Who knew he had such a dirty little mind?
"Isn't the bottom like, girly?" Dustin says, and then, "What would you do?"
"The time I did it, I topped," Chris says, and tries to close his mouth, but he keeps going- "I like being in control."
"That is-" and Dustin actually seriously needs to stop, because he was about to say, that is so fucking hot, and he cannot say that.
"I don't want Mark to feel bad," Dustin says instead, and Chris says, "God, Dustin, that's so adorable."
Dustin snaps his mouth shut, nods, and goes inside. The door of Mark's room is closed.
"Man, come out, I want to make sure you're okay," Dustin calls, and Mark says, "I don't want to talk to you, Dustin, you're annoying."
Dustin tries to pretend that's just the weird thing they're all doing.
But the truth is that's totally something Mark would say anyway.
And then, of course, because this day could not get any more ridiculous, he hears, "Hey, man," from behind him, and turns to see Eduardo, sleepy-eyed, holding a stack of takeout boxes.
"Oh shit, okay, you're here," Dustin says, and goes red. Eduardo narrows his eyes.
"You're being weirder than normal," he says. Dustin can't tell if that's just him or not. Stupid Eduardo with his stupid openness and stupid feelings.
"Eduardo you need to not ask Mark any questions," Chris bursts out, falling into the room behind Eduardo, and Dustin says, "What the fuck, Chris, c'mon."
"Why?" Eduardo asks, and Dustin says, "Because he can't- he isn't lying. He can't lie. Or. Shit. Shit, I'm doing it!"
"This is ridiculous," Chris says. Dustin wholeheartedly agrees.
"I wholeheartedly agree," he says, and Chris gives him a weird look, like Dustin using a four-syllable work is more scandalous than anything else he's told him today.
"Is he okay? Mark? You okay?" Eduardo calls out, and Mark says, "I'm perfectly healthy."
His voice is muffled from behind the door. Dustin narrows his eyes. He would figure out some way to evade it.
"C'mon, Dustin, is he okay?" Eduardo asks, and Chris says, "He's fine, he's just embarrassed-"
"Why is he embarrassed?" Eduardo says, eyes innocent and open, and Dustin cannot take this anymore so he grabs Eduardo's shoulders and says point-blank, "Do you like Mark?"
"Of course I like Mark," Eduardo says, frowning. "He's my best friend."
Chris makes an about-to-aww face and Dustin shuts him up with a look.
"Let me put it this way. Do you want to fuck Mark?"
"Yeah," Eduardo answers, all casual like Dustin asked him if he wanted a beer, and then Eduardo's face goes wide-open and fucking terrified.
"What the fuck," he says, scared and shaky. "I didn't mean to say that, Dustin, what the fuck-."
Chris looks sympathetic but Dustin has already had to admit his frequent masturbation, his virginity, and his maybe-more-than-bro feelings for Chris and he does not have any sympathy for Eduardo because Mark is so stupidly into him and it is dumb. They like each other, they should be together.
"What?" Eduardo says, and he realizes he said that last bit out loud. Fantastic.
"Mark, did you hear that, Eduardo wants to - mmph-" Chris is holding a hand over Dustin's mouth and he says, "Dustin you fucking idiot, c'mon, Eduardo needs to tell Mark himself."
"I don't ever need to tell him," Eduardo says. "He's - he wouldn't want me, anyway-"
"Oh, Wardo," Chris says. "You're so stupid sometimes."
"Whatever, history major," Eduardo says, and then, "Shit, sorry, Chris-"
"Like you'd be majoring in econ if you weren't terrified of what your father would say," Chris says, and then they are just apologizing to each other and Dustin says, "Everyone shut up!"
"Okay, obviously we can't control this thing, so basically we need to not judge each other for the things we say in the next- however long this is, okay, and after it ends we forget it forever."
"I'm never going to forget that you watched that lacrosse player blow me," Chris says, and Eduardo says, "What?"
"I didn't see him blow you-"
"Oh, I guess that happened after you stopped watching."
"What the fuck?" Eduardo says. "You- are you like, into him?"
Dustin says, "I don't know," and honestly means it.
Chris looks away, biting his lip, and says, "I don't like this."
"That's weird, because I love it," Dustin grumbles, and Eduardo says, "I just want to talk to Mark."
"I can't believe you like Mark," Dustin says. "I mean, it's Mark. He's like a prickly little hedgehog."
"He's cute," Chris says, and rolls his eyes heavenward, cheeks going red.
"I know," Eduardo says. "He's nice to me, Dustin, he just gets sick of you."
"Rude!" Dustin says indignantly.
"Everyone in this room is just so gay right now," Chris says, and then, "Have you ever thought about what would happen if we just all touched each other?"
Eduardo says, "That'd actually be really hot," and Dustin says, "Oh God, Chris-"
Chris is hitting his face repeatedly against the couch.
The door creaks behind him, and Dustin wheels around to see Mark coming out, eyes narrowed.
"No one talk to me," he says. "Eduardo your hair looks particularly ridiculous today."
Dustin cracks up but stops when Chris kicks him. Eduardo is patting his head, eyes wide with concern.
"Mark, we just really want you and Eduardo to talk things out, I mean, we might as well get something out of this other than the fact that Dustin likes to watch me have sex-"
"Oh my God, I didn't-" Dustin shakes his head and then says helplessly, "I did kind of like it but not in a creepy way just, you look really-"
"No no no no," Chris chants, backing away. "I can't hear this."
"Great, now you fucking hate me," Dustin says miserably.
"I don't hate you, idiot, it's impossible to hate you," Chris says, and he actually looks like he means that one.
"Even I don't hate you," Mark says quietly, and Dustin spins to look at him. He looks murderous at the treachery of his own mouth.
"But I am often really annoyed by your tendency to talk too much, bother me while I'm working, and do those weird voices whenever you answer the phone-"
"I do those things to brighten your day, Mark, because usually you're a sour little asshole!" Dustin says, and bites his lip. Mark looks, if possible, even more murderous.
"I don't want to fight," Eduardo says. "Mark, I'm sorry about this-"
"It's not your fault," Dustin says, at the exact same time Mark says it.
Eduardo, unsurprisingly, turns to Mark and says, "What?"
"It's not your fault, you always think stuff is your fault when it's not." Mark grits his teeth. "We need to talk about how to stop this-"
"I just want you guys to admit your feelings for each other!" Chris calls out loudly, and then stuffs a pillow in his face.
"Stop biting that pillow, it's reminding me of you having sex," Dustin says, and Chris takes the pillow out of his face, eyes resigned to the horror by now.
"Who knew Dustin was so horny?" Mark asks amusedly.
"I did, I mean, I don't even live here and I've heard him jack off," Eduardo says, and then, "Dustin, fuck-"
"Oh goddamnit!" Dustin says, and stomps into his room and slams the door.
-----
In the room alone he says a couple things into the empty air like "I don't want Chris to hate me, I just-" and then, unwillingly- "I'm scared, I'm scared, I don't like this, what if Wardo and Mark get in a fight-"
Finally it stops, the urge to speak, and he's lying on his side on his bed when Chris knocks and says, "Dustin, hey, I want to talk to you."
"Go away!"
"C'mon, Dustin, don't be a little brat. I don't care about the stuff you said earlier-"
Dustin yanks open the door and Chris finishes, "It kind of turns me on that someone was watching-" and then, "Oh fuck. Just, come outside."
"Where's Wardo?" Dustin asks, because Mark is typing furiously on his laptop, brow furrowed, but Eduardo is nowhere to be seen.
"He left to see his advisor, but I'm pretty sure he was lying about that, since you can't spontaneously schedule advisor meetings, so it's more likely he's nervous about what I might say to him when I can't control my filter, which is justifiable since Eduardo is probably the only person I hold anything back to-"
Mark physically holds his mouth shut at that point. He's still typing with one hand. Dustin turns to Chris and Chris says, "Yeah, he's got it bad."
"Shit," Dustin says. "How the fuck did this start?"
"I don't know," Chris says frustratedly, "I was just - you know, reading or whatever, and you came out and started talking about jerking off and holy shit, what if the cure is you jerking off?"
"I'm not going to jerk off in front of you!" Dustin says, cheeks going pink.
"Yeah, I didn't mean in front of me," Chris says, his face like, really?.
Dustin nods wearily. "Of course you didn't," he says. "Fuck, Chris, I didn't want you to know I'm such a weird fucking loser idiot."
"Hey, c'mon," Chris says, and looks like he's going to take Dustin's hand, but on second thought awkwardly pats his shoulder. "You're not an idiot, Dustin. This is weird, but- I don't think anything could happen that would make us not be friends."
Dustin grins.
"I'm supposed to be the one with the gay crisis, not you," Mark says from the couch, and then, "I want Eduardo to come back."
Like Mark is magical or prophetic or something, the door opens and Eduardo stumbles back in, cheeks burning.
"Oh God, I can't stop doing it with other people!" he says desperately.
"What happened?"
"This girl from my econ class asked how I was and I told her all about what's going on and how embarrassed I was and how I kind of lied about having an advisor meeting, at least, the meeting isn't right now, and she just stared at me and Oh God, I'm such a fucking freak-" Eduardo moans all in one breath.
"Eduardo, relax, it's not like she was gonna get anywhere with you anyway," Chris says. "We need to talk about this."
"I'm so embarrassed," Eduardo says, gulping in a breath.
"Don't be embarrassed, I said it's not your fault!" Mark says pissily. "Just relax. I hate when you work yourself up about something, you always bite your lip a bunch of times and it gets all swollen and flushed-"
He puts the hand over his mouth again, eyes narrowed practically to slits.
"Swollen and flushed," Dustin gasps out between fits of laughter. "Oh my fucking God, Mark."
Eduardo is staring at Mark with something akin to wonder. Mark looks stubbornly angry, hand wedged over his mouth.
"I think we need a plan," Chris says.
"I think we need to clear the room so Mark and Eduardo can have hot monkey sex on the couch!" Dustin says, and Chris says, "Fuck, okay, but I'd rather watch."
"Chris!"
"I'm sorry, fuck, I'm so sorry, this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me," Chris says miserably.
"It can't be as bad as that time you got a boner during Shark Week," Dustin says musingly, and Eduardo and Mark say simultaneously, "What?!"
"Dustin you said you'd never tell anyone about that!" Chris yells. "It wasn't because of the sharks, it was because you were sleeping on my shoulder and you kept breathing in my ear and you look really cute when you're sleeping-"
"I do?"
"You do," Eduardo says unexpectedly. "You look like a five year old. You kind of look like the kid in Jurassic Park, actually. I want to cuddle you and protect you from the Velociraptors."
"So, people want to cuddle with me, but no one actually ever does, that's so unfair!" Dustin says, pouting.
"Don't touch him ever, Dustin," Mark says, and Eduardo's eyes go dark. He licks his lips.
"Please be more possessive, Mark," Dustin says sarcastically. "You wanna put Eduardo on a leash, or something?"
"I wouldn't mind," Eduardo says softly, coyly, and then goes bright red. "Oh, fuck."
"We should leave," Dustin says, tugging on Chris' shirt, and Chris looks up from where he's staring at them, eyes glazed, and says weakly, "No, I don't wanna."
"Jesus, Chris, you're actually the horniest person I've ever met," Dustin says.
"He said a leash, Dustin, Christ, can you picture Wardo in a leash, his neck-"
"Oh my God, shut up!" Wardo says, face still flaming. "I'm not a piece of meat!"
"I don't want to think about it!" Dustin yells, brain hurting, and Mark says, "No one is going to see Eduardo in anything ever except me."
"Holy shit," Dustin says, and Eduardo looks flustered and scared and turned-on.
"Mark-"
"Stop," Mark says, and puts his hands up. "Everyone shut up." He clutches his laptop against his chest and stands up.
"I don't like this," he says. "I don't like talking about Eduardo with you guys here. I don't- it's between me and him."
Chris shoots Dustin a pitiful look, and jerks his head like, we should leave! Dustin gives him a are you fucking crazy? look and turns back to Mark and Eduardo.
"Listen, Mark, basically it's been like eight months of him hanging around the room like a puppy and you should just cut the shit and like, fuck, or whatever you wanna do. Okay?"
"You can't just say it like that!" Eduardo says hotly, blushing. "It's not just about fucking him!"
There's a pause, and then Mark says, "You don't want to-"
"No, I do, obviously I do, that's- " Eduardo's face is getting redder and he looks like he might actually cry. "I just- I want to be with you, all the time, it's not about sex-"
"Oh my God, this is so cute," Chris says giddily.
"Why the fuck are you still here?" Mark says to Dustin and Chris, face protective and angry.
"Fuck, I'm sorry," Eduardo says, and he actually does put a hand over his face, sniffs. "Fucking shit, Mark, I'm sorry."
"Don't be dumb, Wardo, he likes you too, why is everyone so stupid?" Chris says. "Jesus, this is why I'm never going to have an actual boyfriend."
"You don't want a boyfriend?" Dustin says pitifully, and Chris gives him a weird look and Dustin says, "Shut up."
"Please don't be sorry," Mark says. "I know- I know your dad-"
Dustin groans, "Oh God, Eduardo is scared of liking guys-"
"He'd kill me, he'd kill me," Eduardo says, consuming and desperate like that's what runs through his head all the time, and Dustin supposes- well, it is.
"I hate him so much," Mark says. "I hate how he makes you feel."
"I'm trying really hard," Eduardo says. "I can't stop liking you, Mark-"
"Don't -" Mark exhales frustratedly. "Dustin and Chris, can you please leave? Now?"
Dustin shuts his mouth and nods.
"Shit, I'm sorry," he hears Eduardo say as they pull the door shut, and Mark says, "Don't be, Wardo, please, baby-"
"Baby?" Dustin says in shock when they're in the hallway, and Chris says, "I think he's been holding that in for a while."
"Oh God, I'm gonna get sexiled so much now," Dustin says. "Aren't I?"
"Let's make 'em go to Eduardo's room," Chris says, and smiles tiredly at him and Dustin is not- his stupid mind-
"And we'll be alone in the room," he says, and goes red.
"Have you ever given a blow job?" Chris asks, and then rolls his eyes at himself, muttering, "Fucking shit."
"I think I want to, maybe," Dustin says, and Chris looks at the ceiling, puts a hand over his face.
"This is the weirdest day of my life," Dustin says, and Chris makes a noise of agreement, slumping down against the wall.
----
BACK IN THE SUITE...
"Hey, Wardo, don't be sorry, don't be scared, okay, I really- I-" Mark huffs out a breath. "I like you, I mean, obviously, Eduardo, how could anyone not like you."
"You're so much smarter than me," Eduardo says, and then- "Oh shit, I hate this so much. I hate it."
"I'm only smarter when it comes to, you know, coding and shit. I don't know who told you you're not smart, or I guess I know, it's your dad, who is really such an asshole, I hate him, I don't care what you say-"
"I hate him too," Eduardo says, and stumbles backward in shock. "Oh God, Mark. I can't say that."
"Hey, yes you can."
Eduardo swallows hard, and Mark takes a step closer to him, and something sharpens between them and makes his chest squeeze, his stomach go liquid.
"You called me baby," Eduardo says, face scared and something else, maybe excited.
"Yeah," Mark says. "Yeah, I - I've wanted to say that for a really long time."
Eduardo laughs, wetly. "I call you querido in my head," he says. "It's Portuguese."
Mark takes another step toward him, blood thrumming.
"I like that," he says. "I like when you speak Portuguese, makes you sound really hot."
"I like when you talk about code even though I have no clue what you're saying," Eduardo whispers, and he is somehow swaying yet closer, and Mark feels the brush of his breath against his face.
"I think you're hot when you do anything," Mark says. "I've never been more attracted to anyone in my life."
"God, me neither," Eduardo says, and Mark reaches a tentative hand out and puts it on Eduardo's waist, over the navy button-down he's wearing.
"I want to kiss you now," he says honestly. "I think about you when I jerk off, sometimes-"
"I think about blowing you," Eduardo says, breathing hard, voice low. "In the shower, I jack off and think about getting on my knees in front of you and sucking your cock."
"Jesus, I like you so much, Wardo," Mark says. "I don't- when I think about anyone else ever touching you I get so angry-"
That is the thing that makes Eduardo lean forward and catch Mark's lips with his own.
Eduardo opens his mouth right away but keeps it slow, tongue curling around Mark's, stroking his teeth, sucking gently on his lips until he is pushing his hips forward with a needy little sound, and Mark breaks away and says, "You scare me, with how much I want you- it scares me."
"I want to be everything for you," Eduardo whispers, and of course the inside of his head sounds like a cheesy romance novel. Mark says as much and Eduardo laughs warmly, into Mark's cheek, and says, "I can't help it, with you."
They are kissing again, Mark wrapping his hands around to the small of Eduardo's back, marveling at how nice it feels, how warm and solid Eduardo is in his arms, how his nose is pressing just slightly into Mark's cheek and their lips are fitting perfectly together and how Eduardo's hands stroking gently through the curls at the nape of Mark's neck feels really, really good-
"- I have to pee!" Dustin calls from outside. "Shit, sorry! But I really do!"
"We're making out!" Mark calls back before he can stop himself, and Eduardo laughs into his collarbone and Dustin makes an excited noise like a six year old at Disneyworld.
"I'm really happy for you but I might piss myself!" he calls, muffled, and Mark hears Chris say, "Oh my god, Dustin, shut up and go to the common bathroom down the hall."
Mark sucks Eduardo's bottom lip into his mouth and lets it go and Eduardo shudders, eyelids heavy.
"Kissing you is so much better than I imagined," Mark says, and Eduardo smiles, eyes soft, and says, "You thought about this?"
"Yeah," Mark says. "Yeah, when you're- when you study on my bed and you fall asleep next to me, I just- sometimes I look at your mouth and think what it'd be like, you know, to kiss you-" his voice drops involuntarily, and Eduardo looks so turned-on. He keeps breathing out these harsh little gasps, and Mark cannot watch him for one more second so he goes up on his toes and kisses Eduardo hard, wraps one hand around the back of Eduardo's neck and squeezes just slightly, and Eduardo moans into his mouth.
"Do you like when I do that," Mark mumbles, and Eduardo nods frantically.
"I want to be yours," he says, and Mark's cock pulses shockingly, hot and urgent.
"Really, Mark, I'd let you do anything to me," Eduardo says thickly. "Anything."
"Jesus, baby, you are so hot," Mark groans, skin tingling, and Eduardo makes a rough sound in his throat and pushes him onto the couch.
He straddles Mark and Mark says, "I've never hooked up with a guy."
"I have, a couple times," Eduardo says, and a hot rush of anger goes through him. He digs his fingers into Eduardo's hips and says, "I'll fucking kill them."
"Mark, it's okay, I- want you so much. I always wanted you."
"I want you too, I just don't want anyone else to get to touch you-"
"God, you're so possessive," Eduardo says, voice dark. "Jesus, it's hot."
"I just get scared because there are a lot of guys who look better than me," Mark says, and his cheeks go red but he can't stop, it spills out of him-
"I'm like short and ugly and gawky and everyone hates me, which, whatever, I don't care, but you're so beautiful, Wardo."
He swallows hard, ashamed, beautiful, like he's a twelve year old girl, and turns his face away. Eduardo puts his hands warm on Mark's cheeks and makes him look up.
"I think you're beautiful," he says, and no one has ever said that to Mark before. Why would they?
"I love being around you," he continues. "And I want to talk about it, about us, but I also- God, Mark, I feel like a slut but I want to touch your cock, I wanna see it. Can I touch it? With- with my hand?"
"Yeah go right ahead, Wardo, Christ-" Mark gasps out, and Eduardo leans back on Mark's thighs and unzips his jeans.
"You have the biggest dick I've ever seen," he says, and laughs. Mark says, "I think it'd be hot if you choked on it. Shit. Wardo- I didn't mean-"
Eduardo puts his thumb on the head of Mark's cock, leaking precome, sensitive, and says, "Makes my mouth water."
"Jesus fuck, Wardo, you are so sexy-"
"You seriously make me want to deepthroat you," Eduardo says, eyes glazed and dark and Mark nearly comes right then.
"I almost just came," he says stupidly, and Eduardo says, "I know, I felt your dick twitch."
"Can you - can you jerk me off," Mark says, and Eduardo nods and licks his palm, wraps his hand around Mark's cock and says, "Feels good." His face flushes and he lets his mouth fall open, and Mark reaches up with his other hand and slips a finger in.
Eduardo sucks it in hungrily and then another, and he's starting to thrust his hips on top of Mark, groan around Mark's fingers wet and loose in his mouth, and he's still tugging Mark's cock in rough long strokes and he is so fucking gorgeous it almost hurts.
Eduardo moans loud and Mark realizes he said it out loud.
"I'm gonna come," he says, and then, "Shit, oh fuck, baby, yes-"
He comes, vision going white, arching his back, and when he comes back to himself, panting, Eduardo says, "I can't believe I just came in my pants."
"You- oh Christ, Eduardo, that is the hottest thing I've ever heard."
"I couldn't control myself," Eduardo says, and licks Mark's hand one last time, sucks on his fingers, and God, Eduardo is a massive slut when he says what he's thinking, he just-
"Loves sex. Don't you- you fucking love it."
"Yeah, yeah," Eduardo says, neck flushed, still on top of Mark, and Mark says, "I want to cuddle."
Eduardo snorts, grinning crinkly-eyed.
Of course, that is the moment Dustin chooses to come back in the room.
"Oh my God, you fucked on the couch!" Dustin says, disgusted.
Eduardo pulls a blanket off the floor and curls into the couch, next to Mark, pulls the blanket over them and zips Mark's jeans all in one smooth movement. Mark glares up at Dustin, hand curled protectively around Eduardo's back.
Eduardo lifts his head.
"No we didn't, I just jerked Mark off and came in my pants, oh shit, Dustin, go away-"
"If there is one trace of biological fluid on that couch I will cry."
"Dustin, everyone's had sex on the couch," Chris says, coming in behind him, and Dustin says, "I haven't! How rude!"
"You came in your pants? God, Mark's not that hot."
"Whatever, you look like a twelve year old all the time, so Dustin, you're basically a pedophile for wanting to fuck him-"
"He doesn't look twelve!" Dustin says, at the same time Chris says, "He doesn't want to fuck me!"
They stare at each other for a second, and then Dustin says, "So, coming in the pants, Wardo, that's pretty lame."
"Fuck off, I get off on sucking fingers," Eduardo says, and buries his face in Mark's neck, moaning, "Oh God, this is so stupid."
"Think you'd get off on sucking my dick?" Mark asks, and Eduardo says, "I can't fit it in my mouth, but I'd try, shit, I would, I think it'd be hot-"
"Ahhhh," Dustin says, screwing his face up in terror. "Oh God, Chris, this is so much worse than before when it was all puppy feelings and longing looks."
Chris tears his eyes away from Mark and Eduardo says, and Dustin swears he hear him mumble, "This is just like a dream I had-"
"Biggest you've ever seen, huh," Mark murmurs, and Eduardo goes bright red and says unwillingly, "Yeah, Jesus, you're huge-"
"NO!" Dustin yells. "No no no. Okay. Great. You got your shit together. I like that, I'm happy, Chris probably wants to watch you guys fuck, but I don't want to hear about Mark's dick. I do not. Love you, Mark, I do, but thinking about your huge cock is not something I enjoy doing, and Eduardo is making me do it, and I am angry."
"Maybe we should leave again," Chris says. "Not that I don't want to see you suck him off, Eduardo, because your mouth- you just look like you'd be really good at giving head- oh fuck. Fuck."
"Oh my God," Eduardo says, "I am kind of good at it, though-"
Mark says, "You're not going to suck anyone's cock except mine, you understand?"
Eduardo shudders and says, "Yeah, Mark, of course."
"Eduardo's really subby," Chris says, and Dustin says, "Subby?"
"Like I'd let Mark tie me up," Eduardo explains, and Mark says, "Fuck, that'd be so hot, can we do that?"
"You can do anything with me," Eduardo says quietly, and Mark says, "I want to do everything with you."
"Shit, I think I need to touch some boobs," Dustin says desperately. "Like, stat."
"Eww," Eduardo says, screwing up his face, and Chris nods fervently in agreement.
"You're so gay," Mark says, and Eduardo says, "Yeah, pretty much."
"Fuck, I'm thinking about it again," Chris says, eyes roaming over them on the couch, cheeks flushed.
"About-"
"Us all fucking each other, because Wardo, if you just blew Mark, and you got on your knees on- on the floor, yeah, and Dustin and I watched and I jerked him off- Oh goddamnit, no! NO!"
He runs out of the room, and Dustin narrows his eyes at Eduardo and Mark and says, "Well, great, way to go, now you broke Chris' brain with orgy fantasies. Thanks."
"Any time," Eduardo says, grinning, and Dustin storms out of the room, shaking his head.
PART TWO
fandom: the social network
pairing: mark/eduardo, kind of chris/dustin
notes: the cracky lack-of-verbal-filters fic. (prompt here). AKA the one where they act out a john mayer song ("Say", not "Your Body is A Wonderland". Well, maybe a little bit.)
i didn't feel the need to post this because i got so much wonderful and sweet feedback on the meme but i've had people ask me to archive stuff SO so so! i will post it here! suuuper late!
one year anniversary! aw! this fandom, man.
oh and title is matt and kim!
----
Dustin yawns, coming awake slowly. He pulled a half-nighter last night and his entire brain hurts because CS 220 can suck his dick.
He scratches his stomach, noting idly that he'd fallen asleep with a porn video half-loaded, and he laughs, stands up to get some food. Mark's sleeping in the library and Chris is always out of bed early, doing God knows what, so Dustin's all alone. Breakfast and a morning jerk-off session sounds perfect.
He pushes open the door and Chris is sitting on the couch.
"What's up, man?" Chris says, looking up from a thick hard-covered book, face distracted. Dustin inwardly rolls his eyes.
"I wanted to jerk off and now you're here and I can't without being weird," Dustin says, and throws a hand over his mouth, eyes going huge.
Chris is staring at him like he can't quite believe that just happened. Dustin can't believe that just happened. What the fucking fuck.
"What did you just say?" Chris says, face pink, and Dustin says, "I said I want to jerk off but-" he puts his hand back over his mouth and shakes his head.
"That's what I thought," Chris says faintly, and then- "And it's not like we don't hear you anyway, Dustin, you make this really strange noise when you're about to come."
He puts both hands over his mouth in horror and they are staring at each other with their hands on their mouths and it is so fucking ridiculous Dustin nearly sobs with laughter.
Dustin tentatively lifts his hand and tries to say, "Whoa, man, what the fuck is happening," and instead says, "You listen when I'm coming?"
"Sometimes," Chris says. "If I'm bored. Once I listened while I was jerking off in my bed and it was really weird- oh fucking shit!"
His eyes go huge and scared and Dustin snorts out a terrified laugh.
"I have no clue what's going on," he says, and Chris nods, lips clamped tightly shut.
"I can't believe I just said that," Chris says weakly, and Dustin laughs again.
"Where- is Mark here?"
"I hope not," Chris says, and screws up his face in shock at his own words. "He's so fucking irritating in the mornings."
"He's always irritating," Dustin says. "Do you know he's been drinking your orange juice? Straight from the carton."
"Well, once I blew a guy on his bed, so, we're even," Chris says, and his face goes bright red. Dustin cracks up.
"What?"
"We were really drunk and I accidentally went into Mark's room and thank fuck he wasn't there and, I don't know, I just really wanted to blow him," Chris says, and buries his face in the couch and moans, "Oh God Dustin, what the fuck is happening-"
"That's kind of hot," Dustin says, and Chris looks at him in terror and says, "I need to leave," and stands up and slams the door behind him.
He's not even wearing shoes. Dustin opens the door and Chris is sitting on the floor in the hallway, shell-shocked.
"Come back inside," Dustin says. "I'm sorry, man."
"I'm the one who just said I blew a guy in Mark's room-" Chris says, voice choky.
"It's not like I didn't know you were gay, Chris, plus I saw you hooking up with that lacrosse dude on our couch when you thought everyone was out of the suite-"
"Oh my God you saw that?!" Chris screeches, and Dustin is starting to find this really hilarious.
"Man, you kind of have a reputation."
"I just like hooking up!" Chris yells, and his face is boiling red. "It's not like I fuck around! I've only even fucked one guy!"
"Holy shit," Dustin says dazedly, and Chris looks like he might actually expire from shame. He falls sideways onto the floor, clutching his knees, and Dustin leans against the doorjamb and nearly cries with laughter.
He looks through teary eyes at the hallway and Mark is stumbling up the stairs.
"The fuck is going on," Mark mumbles, backpack slung over one shoulder, deep circles around his eyes, and Dustin just points at Chris and cracks up again.
"Chris is telling me all about his dirty sexual exploits," Dustin says, and Chris waves a hand at Mark, face still mashed into the floor.
"Chris is kind of a slut," Mark says, and Dustin sees a flash of shock go over his face at the unexpected words. Huh. Who knew Mark actually had a filter?
"You fucking asshole, you're just a jealous virgin," Chris says, and then, "Mark, shit, no, I didn't mean it-"
"I hate being a virgin," Dustin says, and feels his cheeks heat. Mark looks at him, mouth tight, eyes angry.
"What the fuck is going on?" he demands. "This has to be Dustin's fault, everything's your fault."
"That's not true, I'm not the one who broke your PSP, it was Wardo-"
Oh shit, Dustin had promised to never tell anyone that.
"Well I don't care what Wardo does," Mark says, and his cheeks go pink. Dustin's mouth falls open.
"We all think you like him," Chris says from the floor, and Mark spins quickly on his heel and pushes in the open door. Dustin and Chris stare at each other.
"He totally wants to fuck Wardo," Dustin whispers.
"Or maybe he wants Wardo to fuck him," Chris suggests, and licks his lips. Dustin is becoming seriously in awe of this version of Chris. Who knew he had such a dirty little mind?
"Isn't the bottom like, girly?" Dustin says, and then, "What would you do?"
"The time I did it, I topped," Chris says, and tries to close his mouth, but he keeps going- "I like being in control."
"That is-" and Dustin actually seriously needs to stop, because he was about to say, that is so fucking hot, and he cannot say that.
"I don't want Mark to feel bad," Dustin says instead, and Chris says, "God, Dustin, that's so adorable."
Dustin snaps his mouth shut, nods, and goes inside. The door of Mark's room is closed.
"Man, come out, I want to make sure you're okay," Dustin calls, and Mark says, "I don't want to talk to you, Dustin, you're annoying."
Dustin tries to pretend that's just the weird thing they're all doing.
But the truth is that's totally something Mark would say anyway.
And then, of course, because this day could not get any more ridiculous, he hears, "Hey, man," from behind him, and turns to see Eduardo, sleepy-eyed, holding a stack of takeout boxes.
"Oh shit, okay, you're here," Dustin says, and goes red. Eduardo narrows his eyes.
"You're being weirder than normal," he says. Dustin can't tell if that's just him or not. Stupid Eduardo with his stupid openness and stupid feelings.
"Eduardo you need to not ask Mark any questions," Chris bursts out, falling into the room behind Eduardo, and Dustin says, "What the fuck, Chris, c'mon."
"Why?" Eduardo asks, and Dustin says, "Because he can't- he isn't lying. He can't lie. Or. Shit. Shit, I'm doing it!"
"This is ridiculous," Chris says. Dustin wholeheartedly agrees.
"I wholeheartedly agree," he says, and Chris gives him a weird look, like Dustin using a four-syllable work is more scandalous than anything else he's told him today.
"Is he okay? Mark? You okay?" Eduardo calls out, and Mark says, "I'm perfectly healthy."
His voice is muffled from behind the door. Dustin narrows his eyes. He would figure out some way to evade it.
"C'mon, Dustin, is he okay?" Eduardo asks, and Chris says, "He's fine, he's just embarrassed-"
"Why is he embarrassed?" Eduardo says, eyes innocent and open, and Dustin cannot take this anymore so he grabs Eduardo's shoulders and says point-blank, "Do you like Mark?"
"Of course I like Mark," Eduardo says, frowning. "He's my best friend."
Chris makes an about-to-aww face and Dustin shuts him up with a look.
"Let me put it this way. Do you want to fuck Mark?"
"Yeah," Eduardo answers, all casual like Dustin asked him if he wanted a beer, and then Eduardo's face goes wide-open and fucking terrified.
"What the fuck," he says, scared and shaky. "I didn't mean to say that, Dustin, what the fuck-."
Chris looks sympathetic but Dustin has already had to admit his frequent masturbation, his virginity, and his maybe-more-than-bro feelings for Chris and he does not have any sympathy for Eduardo because Mark is so stupidly into him and it is dumb. They like each other, they should be together.
"What?" Eduardo says, and he realizes he said that last bit out loud. Fantastic.
"Mark, did you hear that, Eduardo wants to - mmph-" Chris is holding a hand over Dustin's mouth and he says, "Dustin you fucking idiot, c'mon, Eduardo needs to tell Mark himself."
"I don't ever need to tell him," Eduardo says. "He's - he wouldn't want me, anyway-"
"Oh, Wardo," Chris says. "You're so stupid sometimes."
"Whatever, history major," Eduardo says, and then, "Shit, sorry, Chris-"
"Like you'd be majoring in econ if you weren't terrified of what your father would say," Chris says, and then they are just apologizing to each other and Dustin says, "Everyone shut up!"
"Okay, obviously we can't control this thing, so basically we need to not judge each other for the things we say in the next- however long this is, okay, and after it ends we forget it forever."
"I'm never going to forget that you watched that lacrosse player blow me," Chris says, and Eduardo says, "What?"
"I didn't see him blow you-"
"Oh, I guess that happened after you stopped watching."
"What the fuck?" Eduardo says. "You- are you like, into him?"
Dustin says, "I don't know," and honestly means it.
Chris looks away, biting his lip, and says, "I don't like this."
"That's weird, because I love it," Dustin grumbles, and Eduardo says, "I just want to talk to Mark."
"I can't believe you like Mark," Dustin says. "I mean, it's Mark. He's like a prickly little hedgehog."
"He's cute," Chris says, and rolls his eyes heavenward, cheeks going red.
"I know," Eduardo says. "He's nice to me, Dustin, he just gets sick of you."
"Rude!" Dustin says indignantly.
"Everyone in this room is just so gay right now," Chris says, and then, "Have you ever thought about what would happen if we just all touched each other?"
Eduardo says, "That'd actually be really hot," and Dustin says, "Oh God, Chris-"
Chris is hitting his face repeatedly against the couch.
The door creaks behind him, and Dustin wheels around to see Mark coming out, eyes narrowed.
"No one talk to me," he says. "Eduardo your hair looks particularly ridiculous today."
Dustin cracks up but stops when Chris kicks him. Eduardo is patting his head, eyes wide with concern.
"Mark, we just really want you and Eduardo to talk things out, I mean, we might as well get something out of this other than the fact that Dustin likes to watch me have sex-"
"Oh my God, I didn't-" Dustin shakes his head and then says helplessly, "I did kind of like it but not in a creepy way just, you look really-"
"No no no no," Chris chants, backing away. "I can't hear this."
"Great, now you fucking hate me," Dustin says miserably.
"I don't hate you, idiot, it's impossible to hate you," Chris says, and he actually looks like he means that one.
"Even I don't hate you," Mark says quietly, and Dustin spins to look at him. He looks murderous at the treachery of his own mouth.
"But I am often really annoyed by your tendency to talk too much, bother me while I'm working, and do those weird voices whenever you answer the phone-"
"I do those things to brighten your day, Mark, because usually you're a sour little asshole!" Dustin says, and bites his lip. Mark looks, if possible, even more murderous.
"I don't want to fight," Eduardo says. "Mark, I'm sorry about this-"
"It's not your fault," Dustin says, at the exact same time Mark says it.
Eduardo, unsurprisingly, turns to Mark and says, "What?"
"It's not your fault, you always think stuff is your fault when it's not." Mark grits his teeth. "We need to talk about how to stop this-"
"I just want you guys to admit your feelings for each other!" Chris calls out loudly, and then stuffs a pillow in his face.
"Stop biting that pillow, it's reminding me of you having sex," Dustin says, and Chris takes the pillow out of his face, eyes resigned to the horror by now.
"Who knew Dustin was so horny?" Mark asks amusedly.
"I did, I mean, I don't even live here and I've heard him jack off," Eduardo says, and then, "Dustin, fuck-"
"Oh goddamnit!" Dustin says, and stomps into his room and slams the door.
-----
In the room alone he says a couple things into the empty air like "I don't want Chris to hate me, I just-" and then, unwillingly- "I'm scared, I'm scared, I don't like this, what if Wardo and Mark get in a fight-"
Finally it stops, the urge to speak, and he's lying on his side on his bed when Chris knocks and says, "Dustin, hey, I want to talk to you."
"Go away!"
"C'mon, Dustin, don't be a little brat. I don't care about the stuff you said earlier-"
Dustin yanks open the door and Chris finishes, "It kind of turns me on that someone was watching-" and then, "Oh fuck. Just, come outside."
"Where's Wardo?" Dustin asks, because Mark is typing furiously on his laptop, brow furrowed, but Eduardo is nowhere to be seen.
"He left to see his advisor, but I'm pretty sure he was lying about that, since you can't spontaneously schedule advisor meetings, so it's more likely he's nervous about what I might say to him when I can't control my filter, which is justifiable since Eduardo is probably the only person I hold anything back to-"
Mark physically holds his mouth shut at that point. He's still typing with one hand. Dustin turns to Chris and Chris says, "Yeah, he's got it bad."
"Shit," Dustin says. "How the fuck did this start?"
"I don't know," Chris says frustratedly, "I was just - you know, reading or whatever, and you came out and started talking about jerking off and holy shit, what if the cure is you jerking off?"
"I'm not going to jerk off in front of you!" Dustin says, cheeks going pink.
"Yeah, I didn't mean in front of me," Chris says, his face like, really?.
Dustin nods wearily. "Of course you didn't," he says. "Fuck, Chris, I didn't want you to know I'm such a weird fucking loser idiot."
"Hey, c'mon," Chris says, and looks like he's going to take Dustin's hand, but on second thought awkwardly pats his shoulder. "You're not an idiot, Dustin. This is weird, but- I don't think anything could happen that would make us not be friends."
Dustin grins.
"I'm supposed to be the one with the gay crisis, not you," Mark says from the couch, and then, "I want Eduardo to come back."
Like Mark is magical or prophetic or something, the door opens and Eduardo stumbles back in, cheeks burning.
"Oh God, I can't stop doing it with other people!" he says desperately.
"What happened?"
"This girl from my econ class asked how I was and I told her all about what's going on and how embarrassed I was and how I kind of lied about having an advisor meeting, at least, the meeting isn't right now, and she just stared at me and Oh God, I'm such a fucking freak-" Eduardo moans all in one breath.
"Eduardo, relax, it's not like she was gonna get anywhere with you anyway," Chris says. "We need to talk about this."
"I'm so embarrassed," Eduardo says, gulping in a breath.
"Don't be embarrassed, I said it's not your fault!" Mark says pissily. "Just relax. I hate when you work yourself up about something, you always bite your lip a bunch of times and it gets all swollen and flushed-"
He puts the hand over his mouth again, eyes narrowed practically to slits.
"Swollen and flushed," Dustin gasps out between fits of laughter. "Oh my fucking God, Mark."
Eduardo is staring at Mark with something akin to wonder. Mark looks stubbornly angry, hand wedged over his mouth.
"I think we need a plan," Chris says.
"I think we need to clear the room so Mark and Eduardo can have hot monkey sex on the couch!" Dustin says, and Chris says, "Fuck, okay, but I'd rather watch."
"Chris!"
"I'm sorry, fuck, I'm so sorry, this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me," Chris says miserably.
"It can't be as bad as that time you got a boner during Shark Week," Dustin says musingly, and Eduardo and Mark say simultaneously, "What?!"
"Dustin you said you'd never tell anyone about that!" Chris yells. "It wasn't because of the sharks, it was because you were sleeping on my shoulder and you kept breathing in my ear and you look really cute when you're sleeping-"
"I do?"
"You do," Eduardo says unexpectedly. "You look like a five year old. You kind of look like the kid in Jurassic Park, actually. I want to cuddle you and protect you from the Velociraptors."
"So, people want to cuddle with me, but no one actually ever does, that's so unfair!" Dustin says, pouting.
"Don't touch him ever, Dustin," Mark says, and Eduardo's eyes go dark. He licks his lips.
"Please be more possessive, Mark," Dustin says sarcastically. "You wanna put Eduardo on a leash, or something?"
"I wouldn't mind," Eduardo says softly, coyly, and then goes bright red. "Oh, fuck."
"We should leave," Dustin says, tugging on Chris' shirt, and Chris looks up from where he's staring at them, eyes glazed, and says weakly, "No, I don't wanna."
"Jesus, Chris, you're actually the horniest person I've ever met," Dustin says.
"He said a leash, Dustin, Christ, can you picture Wardo in a leash, his neck-"
"Oh my God, shut up!" Wardo says, face still flaming. "I'm not a piece of meat!"
"I don't want to think about it!" Dustin yells, brain hurting, and Mark says, "No one is going to see Eduardo in anything ever except me."
"Holy shit," Dustin says, and Eduardo looks flustered and scared and turned-on.
"Mark-"
"Stop," Mark says, and puts his hands up. "Everyone shut up." He clutches his laptop against his chest and stands up.
"I don't like this," he says. "I don't like talking about Eduardo with you guys here. I don't- it's between me and him."
Chris shoots Dustin a pitiful look, and jerks his head like, we should leave! Dustin gives him a are you fucking crazy? look and turns back to Mark and Eduardo.
"Listen, Mark, basically it's been like eight months of him hanging around the room like a puppy and you should just cut the shit and like, fuck, or whatever you wanna do. Okay?"
"You can't just say it like that!" Eduardo says hotly, blushing. "It's not just about fucking him!"
There's a pause, and then Mark says, "You don't want to-"
"No, I do, obviously I do, that's- " Eduardo's face is getting redder and he looks like he might actually cry. "I just- I want to be with you, all the time, it's not about sex-"
"Oh my God, this is so cute," Chris says giddily.
"Why the fuck are you still here?" Mark says to Dustin and Chris, face protective and angry.
"Fuck, I'm sorry," Eduardo says, and he actually does put a hand over his face, sniffs. "Fucking shit, Mark, I'm sorry."
"Don't be dumb, Wardo, he likes you too, why is everyone so stupid?" Chris says. "Jesus, this is why I'm never going to have an actual boyfriend."
"You don't want a boyfriend?" Dustin says pitifully, and Chris gives him a weird look and Dustin says, "Shut up."
"Please don't be sorry," Mark says. "I know- I know your dad-"
Dustin groans, "Oh God, Eduardo is scared of liking guys-"
"He'd kill me, he'd kill me," Eduardo says, consuming and desperate like that's what runs through his head all the time, and Dustin supposes- well, it is.
"I hate him so much," Mark says. "I hate how he makes you feel."
"I'm trying really hard," Eduardo says. "I can't stop liking you, Mark-"
"Don't -" Mark exhales frustratedly. "Dustin and Chris, can you please leave? Now?"
Dustin shuts his mouth and nods.
"Shit, I'm sorry," he hears Eduardo say as they pull the door shut, and Mark says, "Don't be, Wardo, please, baby-"
"Baby?" Dustin says in shock when they're in the hallway, and Chris says, "I think he's been holding that in for a while."
"Oh God, I'm gonna get sexiled so much now," Dustin says. "Aren't I?"
"Let's make 'em go to Eduardo's room," Chris says, and smiles tiredly at him and Dustin is not- his stupid mind-
"And we'll be alone in the room," he says, and goes red.
"Have you ever given a blow job?" Chris asks, and then rolls his eyes at himself, muttering, "Fucking shit."
"I think I want to, maybe," Dustin says, and Chris looks at the ceiling, puts a hand over his face.
"This is the weirdest day of my life," Dustin says, and Chris makes a noise of agreement, slumping down against the wall.
----
BACK IN THE SUITE...
"Hey, Wardo, don't be sorry, don't be scared, okay, I really- I-" Mark huffs out a breath. "I like you, I mean, obviously, Eduardo, how could anyone not like you."
"You're so much smarter than me," Eduardo says, and then- "Oh shit, I hate this so much. I hate it."
"I'm only smarter when it comes to, you know, coding and shit. I don't know who told you you're not smart, or I guess I know, it's your dad, who is really such an asshole, I hate him, I don't care what you say-"
"I hate him too," Eduardo says, and stumbles backward in shock. "Oh God, Mark. I can't say that."
"Hey, yes you can."
Eduardo swallows hard, and Mark takes a step closer to him, and something sharpens between them and makes his chest squeeze, his stomach go liquid.
"You called me baby," Eduardo says, face scared and something else, maybe excited.
"Yeah," Mark says. "Yeah, I - I've wanted to say that for a really long time."
Eduardo laughs, wetly. "I call you querido in my head," he says. "It's Portuguese."
Mark takes another step toward him, blood thrumming.
"I like that," he says. "I like when you speak Portuguese, makes you sound really hot."
"I like when you talk about code even though I have no clue what you're saying," Eduardo whispers, and he is somehow swaying yet closer, and Mark feels the brush of his breath against his face.
"I think you're hot when you do anything," Mark says. "I've never been more attracted to anyone in my life."
"God, me neither," Eduardo says, and Mark reaches a tentative hand out and puts it on Eduardo's waist, over the navy button-down he's wearing.
"I want to kiss you now," he says honestly. "I think about you when I jerk off, sometimes-"
"I think about blowing you," Eduardo says, breathing hard, voice low. "In the shower, I jack off and think about getting on my knees in front of you and sucking your cock."
"Jesus, I like you so much, Wardo," Mark says. "I don't- when I think about anyone else ever touching you I get so angry-"
That is the thing that makes Eduardo lean forward and catch Mark's lips with his own.
Eduardo opens his mouth right away but keeps it slow, tongue curling around Mark's, stroking his teeth, sucking gently on his lips until he is pushing his hips forward with a needy little sound, and Mark breaks away and says, "You scare me, with how much I want you- it scares me."
"I want to be everything for you," Eduardo whispers, and of course the inside of his head sounds like a cheesy romance novel. Mark says as much and Eduardo laughs warmly, into Mark's cheek, and says, "I can't help it, with you."
They are kissing again, Mark wrapping his hands around to the small of Eduardo's back, marveling at how nice it feels, how warm and solid Eduardo is in his arms, how his nose is pressing just slightly into Mark's cheek and their lips are fitting perfectly together and how Eduardo's hands stroking gently through the curls at the nape of Mark's neck feels really, really good-
"- I have to pee!" Dustin calls from outside. "Shit, sorry! But I really do!"
"We're making out!" Mark calls back before he can stop himself, and Eduardo laughs into his collarbone and Dustin makes an excited noise like a six year old at Disneyworld.
"I'm really happy for you but I might piss myself!" he calls, muffled, and Mark hears Chris say, "Oh my god, Dustin, shut up and go to the common bathroom down the hall."
Mark sucks Eduardo's bottom lip into his mouth and lets it go and Eduardo shudders, eyelids heavy.
"Kissing you is so much better than I imagined," Mark says, and Eduardo smiles, eyes soft, and says, "You thought about this?"
"Yeah," Mark says. "Yeah, when you're- when you study on my bed and you fall asleep next to me, I just- sometimes I look at your mouth and think what it'd be like, you know, to kiss you-" his voice drops involuntarily, and Eduardo looks so turned-on. He keeps breathing out these harsh little gasps, and Mark cannot watch him for one more second so he goes up on his toes and kisses Eduardo hard, wraps one hand around the back of Eduardo's neck and squeezes just slightly, and Eduardo moans into his mouth.
"Do you like when I do that," Mark mumbles, and Eduardo nods frantically.
"I want to be yours," he says, and Mark's cock pulses shockingly, hot and urgent.
"Really, Mark, I'd let you do anything to me," Eduardo says thickly. "Anything."
"Jesus, baby, you are so hot," Mark groans, skin tingling, and Eduardo makes a rough sound in his throat and pushes him onto the couch.
He straddles Mark and Mark says, "I've never hooked up with a guy."
"I have, a couple times," Eduardo says, and a hot rush of anger goes through him. He digs his fingers into Eduardo's hips and says, "I'll fucking kill them."
"Mark, it's okay, I- want you so much. I always wanted you."
"I want you too, I just don't want anyone else to get to touch you-"
"God, you're so possessive," Eduardo says, voice dark. "Jesus, it's hot."
"I just get scared because there are a lot of guys who look better than me," Mark says, and his cheeks go red but he can't stop, it spills out of him-
"I'm like short and ugly and gawky and everyone hates me, which, whatever, I don't care, but you're so beautiful, Wardo."
He swallows hard, ashamed, beautiful, like he's a twelve year old girl, and turns his face away. Eduardo puts his hands warm on Mark's cheeks and makes him look up.
"I think you're beautiful," he says, and no one has ever said that to Mark before. Why would they?
"I love being around you," he continues. "And I want to talk about it, about us, but I also- God, Mark, I feel like a slut but I want to touch your cock, I wanna see it. Can I touch it? With- with my hand?"
"Yeah go right ahead, Wardo, Christ-" Mark gasps out, and Eduardo leans back on Mark's thighs and unzips his jeans.
"You have the biggest dick I've ever seen," he says, and laughs. Mark says, "I think it'd be hot if you choked on it. Shit. Wardo- I didn't mean-"
Eduardo puts his thumb on the head of Mark's cock, leaking precome, sensitive, and says, "Makes my mouth water."
"Jesus fuck, Wardo, you are so sexy-"
"You seriously make me want to deepthroat you," Eduardo says, eyes glazed and dark and Mark nearly comes right then.
"I almost just came," he says stupidly, and Eduardo says, "I know, I felt your dick twitch."
"Can you - can you jerk me off," Mark says, and Eduardo nods and licks his palm, wraps his hand around Mark's cock and says, "Feels good." His face flushes and he lets his mouth fall open, and Mark reaches up with his other hand and slips a finger in.
Eduardo sucks it in hungrily and then another, and he's starting to thrust his hips on top of Mark, groan around Mark's fingers wet and loose in his mouth, and he's still tugging Mark's cock in rough long strokes and he is so fucking gorgeous it almost hurts.
Eduardo moans loud and Mark realizes he said it out loud.
"I'm gonna come," he says, and then, "Shit, oh fuck, baby, yes-"
He comes, vision going white, arching his back, and when he comes back to himself, panting, Eduardo says, "I can't believe I just came in my pants."
"You- oh Christ, Eduardo, that is the hottest thing I've ever heard."
"I couldn't control myself," Eduardo says, and licks Mark's hand one last time, sucks on his fingers, and God, Eduardo is a massive slut when he says what he's thinking, he just-
"Loves sex. Don't you- you fucking love it."
"Yeah, yeah," Eduardo says, neck flushed, still on top of Mark, and Mark says, "I want to cuddle."
Eduardo snorts, grinning crinkly-eyed.
Of course, that is the moment Dustin chooses to come back in the room.
"Oh my God, you fucked on the couch!" Dustin says, disgusted.
Eduardo pulls a blanket off the floor and curls into the couch, next to Mark, pulls the blanket over them and zips Mark's jeans all in one smooth movement. Mark glares up at Dustin, hand curled protectively around Eduardo's back.
Eduardo lifts his head.
"No we didn't, I just jerked Mark off and came in my pants, oh shit, Dustin, go away-"
"If there is one trace of biological fluid on that couch I will cry."
"Dustin, everyone's had sex on the couch," Chris says, coming in behind him, and Dustin says, "I haven't! How rude!"
"You came in your pants? God, Mark's not that hot."
"Whatever, you look like a twelve year old all the time, so Dustin, you're basically a pedophile for wanting to fuck him-"
"He doesn't look twelve!" Dustin says, at the same time Chris says, "He doesn't want to fuck me!"
They stare at each other for a second, and then Dustin says, "So, coming in the pants, Wardo, that's pretty lame."
"Fuck off, I get off on sucking fingers," Eduardo says, and buries his face in Mark's neck, moaning, "Oh God, this is so stupid."
"Think you'd get off on sucking my dick?" Mark asks, and Eduardo says, "I can't fit it in my mouth, but I'd try, shit, I would, I think it'd be hot-"
"Ahhhh," Dustin says, screwing his face up in terror. "Oh God, Chris, this is so much worse than before when it was all puppy feelings and longing looks."
Chris tears his eyes away from Mark and Eduardo says, and Dustin swears he hear him mumble, "This is just like a dream I had-"
"Biggest you've ever seen, huh," Mark murmurs, and Eduardo goes bright red and says unwillingly, "Yeah, Jesus, you're huge-"
"NO!" Dustin yells. "No no no. Okay. Great. You got your shit together. I like that, I'm happy, Chris probably wants to watch you guys fuck, but I don't want to hear about Mark's dick. I do not. Love you, Mark, I do, but thinking about your huge cock is not something I enjoy doing, and Eduardo is making me do it, and I am angry."
"Maybe we should leave again," Chris says. "Not that I don't want to see you suck him off, Eduardo, because your mouth- you just look like you'd be really good at giving head- oh fuck. Fuck."
"Oh my God," Eduardo says, "I am kind of good at it, though-"
Mark says, "You're not going to suck anyone's cock except mine, you understand?"
Eduardo shudders and says, "Yeah, Mark, of course."
"Eduardo's really subby," Chris says, and Dustin says, "Subby?"
"Like I'd let Mark tie me up," Eduardo explains, and Mark says, "Fuck, that'd be so hot, can we do that?"
"You can do anything with me," Eduardo says quietly, and Mark says, "I want to do everything with you."
"Shit, I think I need to touch some boobs," Dustin says desperately. "Like, stat."
"Eww," Eduardo says, screwing up his face, and Chris nods fervently in agreement.
"You're so gay," Mark says, and Eduardo says, "Yeah, pretty much."
"Fuck, I'm thinking about it again," Chris says, eyes roaming over them on the couch, cheeks flushed.
"About-"
"Us all fucking each other, because Wardo, if you just blew Mark, and you got on your knees on- on the floor, yeah, and Dustin and I watched and I jerked him off- Oh goddamnit, no! NO!"
He runs out of the room, and Dustin narrows his eyes at Eduardo and Mark and says, "Well, great, way to go, now you broke Chris' brain with orgy fantasies. Thanks."
"Any time," Eduardo says, grinning, and Dustin storms out of the room, shaking his head.
PART TWO