About 2,120 words, give or take a dozen
Outside the Chester Beatty museum in Dublin there’s a small gumball dispenser, the kind you see everywhere, only this one wasn’t filled with gumballs, but with gemstones. The charm of this method of delivery is kind of ruined when they had to put this sticker on, to avoid broken teeth and potential lawsuits. For those who can’t make it out, the label says “Warning: These are not sweets. They are gemstones.”
Meanwhile, in O’Neill’s bar, an old advertising sign sells “Invalid Port - Specially Selected for the use of invalids”. We had a hard time deciding what constitutes valid port.