Yeah, I'm the asshole.
You know I am sick of this shit. I have taken enough shit from females. I don't want to hear another girl tell me how fucked up and wrong I am for living my fucking life. You know what, FUCK EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU! You all want to call me an ass hole?!?! FINE! I'll be a fucking ass hole. I don't need that shit. I never asked for that shit to happen. What am I supposed to just turn my back and let it slide? Then what would I be? A fucking idiot. I'm sick and tired of relationships. I always look like an ass hole in the end, no matter who the fucks fault it was. I'm not doing them anymore. I told myself this last time, and look where I am today! Friendships ruined! People talkin behind my back, sneakin around tryin to information about me. What the fuck? You think I wouldn't find out? You think no one tells me shit? You think people don't slip and tell me every fucking thing you say about me when I'm not there? I'm done with this, and I'm done with relationships. I don't need them. I'm sitting here fucking crying over this bull shit. Fucking hate this. YOU GOT MAD CAUSE I TOOK A PICTURE?!?!?
Today was just a bad fucking day. I'm tired, I can't go to sleep, people keep fucking with me all day, and now I got this shit that I am gonna have to deal with. I don't even want to deal with it anymore. What is the point? Make it seem better? Not gonna happen. I entered freestyle again, fucking sucked ass. I was horrible. I watched the tape, it was bad. I don't even know why I thought I had a chance at winning anything. Everyone else got screwed because I came in 4th. I should have been last. I fucking suck. I don't even know why I keep trying. I haven't won a big tournament and I never will. CSA2 was on some bullshit. Only reason we won is because everyone else fucked up. I fucking hate myself for even trying. I KNEW I wasn't gonna win, and instead of just following my mind, I went ahead and entered. I should fucking shoot myself in the leg. JUST FUCKING HORRIBLE. I really hate myself right now. This isn't a fuckin emo post, I am really just pissed off at myself and some of the people around me. You know what is even better! I get to jump right back into my daily life of waking up at 6am on the weekdays. I start working Monday, and I have class in the morning. Can someone, please save me from this. I can't handle it. I feel like I am gonna snap. OH YEAH THATS RIGHT! I can't snap! I have a 3 year old brother that loves me too much, I have a job, I have school work, AND! on top of all that, I have myself. Why can't life just be easy......I love my life, and that is the honest truth, but fuck...give me a break sometimes...
Today was just a bad fucking day. I'm tired, I can't go to sleep, people keep fucking with me all day, and now I got this shit that I am gonna have to deal with. I don't even want to deal with it anymore. What is the point? Make it seem better? Not gonna happen. I entered freestyle again, fucking sucked ass. I was horrible. I watched the tape, it was bad. I don't even know why I thought I had a chance at winning anything. Everyone else got screwed because I came in 4th. I should have been last. I fucking suck. I don't even know why I keep trying. I haven't won a big tournament and I never will. CSA2 was on some bullshit. Only reason we won is because everyone else fucked up. I fucking hate myself for even trying. I KNEW I wasn't gonna win, and instead of just following my mind, I went ahead and entered. I should fucking shoot myself in the leg. JUST FUCKING HORRIBLE. I really hate myself right now. This isn't a fuckin emo post, I am really just pissed off at myself and some of the people around me. You know what is even better! I get to jump right back into my daily life of waking up at 6am on the weekdays. I start working Monday, and I have class in the morning. Can someone, please save me from this. I can't handle it. I feel like I am gonna snap. OH YEAH THATS RIGHT! I can't snap! I have a 3 year old brother that loves me too much, I have a job, I have school work, AND! on top of all that, I have myself. Why can't life just be easy......I love my life, and that is the honest truth, but fuck...give me a break sometimes...