i'm ridiculous like that
wednesday...
the most dreaded of my life.
every wednesday is dreaded.
usually because of of 7 hours of school plus sport.
but this wednesday.
my mother.
conversations with people about my depression and me not looking forward to coming home don't help. some people (aka jon leonard) actually make things look more... depressing.
coming here was a different feeling. exciting, starting something new. new friends, new everything.
going home... is more like letting everything go. everything i had to adjust to accept, all the friends i had to struggle to make. all the bier i have just discovered.
all the feelings i never knew i had. all the happiness that was intertwined with anger.
i may have given off the perception that i wasn't doing okay here, which for awhile was true. but not now. now i have so many things i want to accomplish. the only thing i haet is chool. i hate being in that prison with those people who would never understand what i was going through and never really cared because i was american.
i can't wait to see everyone but i know that i will be crying the entire 8 hour plane ride to washington, and then the day and a half i'll be there. and then the entire 4 hour plane ride back to wichita. and i'll probably be crying and begging for karneval wieder.
liebe deutschland,
dankeschön. ich kann nichts mehr sagen. du hast mir so viel gegeben. du has mein leben und zukunft gegeben. du hast mir freunde, exs, und verstandnis gegeben. du bist meine beste freund und fast meine eigene. wir sind ein. ich bin deutschland, du bist deutschland.
ich bin so fröh, dass ich diese erfahrung gemacht hab. ich weiß nicht wie so ich früher angst hatte. ich kann nur dankeschön sagen.
danke für naomi, laura, jared, brent, dane, stephen, kate, stefels, kristina, jackie, teddy... beate, gerd, sonnenschein, ralf, ben... danke.
ich bin jetzt wer ich sein sollte... wegen dir. ich bin jetzt kym. ich bin jetzt fröh und bereit für alles, dass kommen wird. ohne dich könnte ich mein leben nicht schaffen.
deine,
kym
the most dreaded of my life.
every wednesday is dreaded.
usually because of of 7 hours of school plus sport.
but this wednesday.
my mother.
conversations with people about my depression and me not looking forward to coming home don't help. some people (aka jon leonard) actually make things look more... depressing.
coming here was a different feeling. exciting, starting something new. new friends, new everything.
going home... is more like letting everything go. everything i had to adjust to accept, all the friends i had to struggle to make. all the bier i have just discovered.
all the feelings i never knew i had. all the happiness that was intertwined with anger.
i may have given off the perception that i wasn't doing okay here, which for awhile was true. but not now. now i have so many things i want to accomplish. the only thing i haet is chool. i hate being in that prison with those people who would never understand what i was going through and never really cared because i was american.
i can't wait to see everyone but i know that i will be crying the entire 8 hour plane ride to washington, and then the day and a half i'll be there. and then the entire 4 hour plane ride back to wichita. and i'll probably be crying and begging for karneval wieder.
liebe deutschland,
dankeschön. ich kann nichts mehr sagen. du hast mir so viel gegeben. du has mein leben und zukunft gegeben. du hast mir freunde, exs, und verstandnis gegeben. du bist meine beste freund und fast meine eigene. wir sind ein. ich bin deutschland, du bist deutschland.
ich bin so fröh, dass ich diese erfahrung gemacht hab. ich weiß nicht wie so ich früher angst hatte. ich kann nur dankeschön sagen.
danke für naomi, laura, jared, brent, dane, stephen, kate, stefels, kristina, jackie, teddy... beate, gerd, sonnenschein, ralf, ben... danke.
ich bin jetzt wer ich sein sollte... wegen dir. ich bin jetzt kym. ich bin jetzt fröh und bereit für alles, dass kommen wird. ohne dich könnte ich mein leben nicht schaffen.
deine,
kym