(no subject)
i feel like im in haiti, there are all these beetles flyin around. they got in when my mom left the living room window open to smoke... yuck...
im going to go look at a car tomorrow. it a mercedes, i have now idea if its in good condition or not, but the guy who wants to sell it is needing quick cash, so its only $250. who knows. ill know more tomorrow i guess.
i think everyone on the planet has something to do except me. i have no fucking life. and its really sad to think that since toren left the only people i really hang out with would be my shelby and larry. its strange how you can drift apart from your friends when living in a tiny town.
my head is spinning. im terrified about moving, but i know its for the best. i just got my GED scores back, i passed... but i am a little disappointed. owell. im having a bit of trouble besides that. i wont have my GED transcripts for another two weeks. i have to apply for everything in 12 days. i just hope i can get everything i need before then. i know everything will work out the way it should... or i keep telling myself i know that. and if worse comes to worse i can always just go to wake tech in the spring, i would have time to save up, and stay here a little while, go see my mom in gorgia... who knows =)
i started to pack, its actually harder than i thought it would be. emotionally that is. i got everything i wanted out of my room and i took everything down on my walls. it took me days to put it all up there and a matter of minutes to take it down. ive still got a lot to go. i need to get things into certain boxes and stuff like that. i dont have much at all. just a few pictures i found which i dont want to leave here. several of me and noelle. i was surprised to see them, still in their frames anyways. i hadnt been in my closet in about a year. found some old art work and poetry. there were some books. basically the pictures are what made the tears start falling like rain. its not like i can stay here, but i just dont really have any friends up there. i dont feel at home anywhere any more.
i talked to stephanie, she said she would love for me to live with her. but she also said she was finally happy with her life and where she lived... she finally felt 'at home'... the only time i have felt at home the last three years was when i was with toren, or jes (thanks for treating me as good as you do)
ill get over all of this once i get there i guess. everything seems to be okay with me moving in with my aunt and uncle, but at the same time i still feel like im imposing. karla and i had a little talk before i came back down here. she said she hated a mess and no 'alone' time. and she didnt want me staying there too long because she and mario are sick of being quiet when they have sex. so now you know, i kinda feel like i should move in with someone else as soon as i possibly can.
blah blah blah, i know my life is filled with fucking excitement, but its time for me to turn in.
im going to go look at a car tomorrow. it a mercedes, i have now idea if its in good condition or not, but the guy who wants to sell it is needing quick cash, so its only $250. who knows. ill know more tomorrow i guess.
i think everyone on the planet has something to do except me. i have no fucking life. and its really sad to think that since toren left the only people i really hang out with would be my shelby and larry. its strange how you can drift apart from your friends when living in a tiny town.
my head is spinning. im terrified about moving, but i know its for the best. i just got my GED scores back, i passed... but i am a little disappointed. owell. im having a bit of trouble besides that. i wont have my GED transcripts for another two weeks. i have to apply for everything in 12 days. i just hope i can get everything i need before then. i know everything will work out the way it should... or i keep telling myself i know that. and if worse comes to worse i can always just go to wake tech in the spring, i would have time to save up, and stay here a little while, go see my mom in gorgia... who knows =)
i started to pack, its actually harder than i thought it would be. emotionally that is. i got everything i wanted out of my room and i took everything down on my walls. it took me days to put it all up there and a matter of minutes to take it down. ive still got a lot to go. i need to get things into certain boxes and stuff like that. i dont have much at all. just a few pictures i found which i dont want to leave here. several of me and noelle. i was surprised to see them, still in their frames anyways. i hadnt been in my closet in about a year. found some old art work and poetry. there were some books. basically the pictures are what made the tears start falling like rain. its not like i can stay here, but i just dont really have any friends up there. i dont feel at home anywhere any more.
i talked to stephanie, she said she would love for me to live with her. but she also said she was finally happy with her life and where she lived... she finally felt 'at home'... the only time i have felt at home the last three years was when i was with toren, or jes (thanks for treating me as good as you do)
ill get over all of this once i get there i guess. everything seems to be okay with me moving in with my aunt and uncle, but at the same time i still feel like im imposing. karla and i had a little talk before i came back down here. she said she hated a mess and no 'alone' time. and she didnt want me staying there too long because she and mario are sick of being quiet when they have sex. so now you know, i kinda feel like i should move in with someone else as soon as i possibly can.
blah blah blah, i know my life is filled with fucking excitement, but its time for me to turn in.