No Nazis in Bear Territory. I'm Sure Mario Savio Would Agree.

[yasaman]

Things I've done since my last update to feel less powerless and hopeless in our new national nightmare!

• Finished putting all my local and national representatives' contact information in my phone.
• Emailed Mayor Garcetti thanking him for his support of the LAX protests and keeping LA a sanctuary city.
• Called Feinstein's office, and WONDER OF WONDERS, actually got through, and told them to oppose Gorsuch's nomination/confirmation.
• Called Kamala Harris's office, left a message asking her to bring Rep. Stephanie Murphy's Protect The National Security Council From Political Interference Act to the Senate.
• Called my House Rep. Karen Bass's office asking her to support Rep. Stephanie Murphy's Protect The National Security Council From Political Interference Act, and spoke with an actual person about it, hooray.
• Downloaded the Countable app, which looks like a convenient way to keep track of what reps are voting on.
• Downloaded Signal. Seemed prudent.
• Filled out Kamala Harris's little survey about issues that matter to me, hopefully that's worth something.

Also, I am REALLY DAMN PROUD of my alma mater, y'all. I don't give a fuck if some property was destroyed: UC Berkeley students SHOWED UP to tell literal Nazi Milo Yiannopoulos to fuck off, and they SHOWED UP to protect the vulnerable undocumented students among them, because that Nazi motherfucker was going to goddamn doxx them at that event. So fuck that noise. Property is cheap. Lives aren't. No Nazis in Bear Territory. (I was trying to fit that into one of the school sports chant, but it doesn't scan.)

So. I am trying to dig in for the long haul with this, and sustain this level of (comparatively) minimal action, which is difficult for me because:

• I am an overachiever and perfectionist. Part of me is always going to think "YOU COULD BE DOING MORE, AND DOING IT BETTER" and that's stressful and makes this low level of political activism way more draining than it has to be.
• I don't like phone calls.
• Giving in to despair and the DOES ANY OF IT EVEN MATTER impulse is a strong desire, which requires righteous anger and determined hope to constantly combat.
• I need to figure out a healthy amount of paying attention to the news.
• I am FURIOUS and I'm not a person who likes to be angry. I'm an even-tempered person, for the most part, and I like it that way. I don't easily get angry, usually, and very rarely on an interpersonal level. But I'm angry a lot now, and that's a rational response, but I'm not super happy about it.
• I have, in the past, benefited enormously from passing-white privilege,, and from the way class markers can insulate you from some forms of racism/xenophobia. You tend to notice it when your family has a range of skin tones, and you, the palest of the pale and mostly just vaguely ethnic looking, get exponentially less shit than the family members who are more dark-skinned, more obviously Afghan or Middle Eastern. Passing does not feel like safety any more. Having what privilege I did have abruptly yanked out from under me fucking sucks. I hate the amount of fear it introduces to my daily life, I hate how I legit automatically distrust white people now because all I can think is did you vote for Trump? Did you do this to me, to us, to a nation I love? Welcome to basically every other POC's life, I know. Feeling like this only strengthens my resolve to stand in solidarity with my other POC brothers and sisters though. So, y'know, silver lining.

All that said, I'm trying hard to make all this low level activism a part of my routine. I may not be able to show up to every protest, because work and because other weekend commitments and mental energy limitations, but I can show up to some and that's okay. I can do at least one civic engagement thing per day. I can be one small part of maintaining relentless scrutiny and pressure on our elected representatives.

This entry was originally posted at http://yasaman.dreamwidth.org/474705.html, with
comments there.