trying to be me for once
we were so strong yet to my suprise the ime spent apart,the time spent fighting,it ended in our demise.i hear your voice on the other line but it's not the voice that i loved the voice that let me know that everything would be ok.I found no comfort in it.all it did was remind me of the bittersweet fact that this is over.that we'll never ever be again or at least not for anytime soon.and all my friends are glad that i am finally realizing what they have been trying to tell me all along.that you weren't right for me that you didnt treat me how i should be treated that you just didnt see me.and you didnt.you took for granet all of my sacrifices everything i did for you,for us.it was as if it were nothing.but i cant regret the past 5 months because even though i shouldnt love you i still do and the fact remains i will always love you.i guess thats why i said yes when you asked to spend the weekend with me.its one last chance to pretend that we're us again.we can put on our happy faces and act like nobody else exist in the world but us.its a chance to go back but when it comes down to it was can never go back.things will never ever be the same.you've changed i've changed and we aren't who we used to be.and some nights i long for you but that's happening less and less.and when the phone rings i dont jump and hope its you.i find myself not looking to see if your online.those are all sings that i have moved on i am over you.and when this weekend is done i can walk away and not turn my head and look back.i can hug and kiss you goodbye and not think omg when will be the next time i will do that again.and i can say that no tears will fall because i have allready cried them all.but if you werent leaving this would of still had to end.when we started i needed someone to pull me through help me do everything cause i couldnt deal with it all on my own.but now i need to be free i need to do my own thing.i need to see all the things around me.i want so badly to be able to go out and not worry about my actions affecting someone else.i need to just worry about me.do what i want for once.i cant be held back any longer.there are so many option and different dirrections my life can go in.i am at a cross road and the choices are endless.and right now you keeping me from making the decisions i know deep down in my heart i need to make.and i know you never ment to hold me back but you have and i know everything your going to say.and i dont hate you.but the truth is i am ready to stand on my own two feet.i am ready to make decisions on my own.i am ready to just be me....