Realization
I'm not scared of change, as far as myself, I'm scared of it as far as everything around me changing,I can't handle that part. Like the littlest change, upsets me, it makes me feel weird and sometimes upset. I dont even want to give my example of the littlest change to me, because I know everyone will think i'm stupid. Plus I feel it today over something, and its like OMG this has got to be the most stupidest feeling Ive ever felt. Its just how I sometimes let the littlest things bug the shit out of me and start a huge commotion. I get very jealous over things also, I hate being me sometimes, I get so theat up with thinking like I do. But I mean at one point I was spoiled always getting what I wanted and getting away with things. Than something happens, no more spoiling, everything changed. But I dealt with it, cause this matter was more serious than worrying about being spoiled. Now I just find myself irratated and jealous at the same time with people I know who seemed spoiled or get what they want all the time. Or maybe sometimes its the fact I wish I could be them right now, and have everything they have. Major jealousy. God being me sometimes just really blows, I want to get the part of my brain that goes into over-drive of thinking taken out just so Id be totally emotionless and wouldn't give a shit.
What the fuck? Ugh. Stupid brains. bye!
What the fuck? Ugh. Stupid brains. bye!