I should just fade a w a y
well today, hmm. after i ate, i typed a paper for my mom, played guitar, talked to sebby, and checked my email. then i read a book "all's fair in love, war, and high school" and i started thinking bout my life and a lot of other things. and how people are all "youre my best friend" and all they do is hurt me and use me. and i just thought about how unfair life is, and how boys are just filled with bullshit and how my life is fucking pathetic and pointless. i cannot wait till i die. and my blood pressure skyrocketed, i turned pale as hell, and had a stress attack and was rushed to the hospital again. i have my own doctor cuz of how often i go there. dr. mucci. he said tat if i dont take it easy im gonna die of a heart attack when im 17 and almost had a stroke today =( ANYWAY! he took care of my mom in the summer. hes really funny, and kinda fat, but still really awesome. fat people are usually nice people. its the skinny people who are bitches and assholes and you just want to wring their neck cuz their all "oh im 103 pounds and a size zero, arent i cute? do you thing this shirt is tight enough to make my boobs stand out" UGH!! i fucking hate people like tat.
1) you just have to make me feel fat, dont you!
2) so what youre a size zero! TAT JUST MEANS YOU HAVE NO BUTT!
3) if youre 103, how the fuck are you supposed to have any boobs?
YOU FUCKING ASS SLUT!!!! YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!!!!
anyway, where was i. oh yeah! then after a few hours there, i came home and zonked out cuz of all my meds. then i went downstairs, ate french fries and chocolate munchkins, and watched my aunt's wedding video. then i talked to sebby some more, and he and his friend bill really cheered me up. then i hooked up my mic and amp to my mixer and played guitar and sang for awhile. then sebby and rach came on, and i felt like sebby was ignoring me and just talking to rach. id say something, and hed respond five minutes later. so i got pissed. cuz rachel, i cant take her. i cant. her goal in life is to take away all my friends and make me feel fucking fat and miserable. and shes all "my life sucks cuz i dont have a boyfriend" WELL NEITHER DO I! BUT MY LIFE SUCKS FOR MORE THAN TAT!!! and then clayton came online and we got into a fight, and its my fault. and i ended up blowing up on him and sebby, ugh. and about the pope. okay. hes the best fucking person on this planet, no-one has done as much good as him. and since i was little i would call him my dobre-dzadzu. and when i was little and i went to poland, i have a video of me meeting him. and i will never ever forget tat. why is the media making such a big deal out of his condition?! this is humiliating to him! put yourself in his shoes! wouldnt you be humiliated if your health ailments were blown up all over the world?! these stupid fucking jewish politicians, we all know jews and catholics do not get along. its like the world is waiting for him to die. and it just breaks my heart even more. do you know how many popes were murdered at the vatican?! the pope before john paul II was poisoned, how do we know that the doctors now wont poison him through his feeding tube or something?! im sure the mafia would do something, i mean, pope john paul II is the first non-italian pope, i wouldnt put it pass them. and i swear to God, if pope john paul didnt have tat surgery earlier, then those doctors wouldnt have messed up his larynx and trachea and esophagus and he wouldnt need tat feeding tube right now. the last time the pope went to the hospital, he took a bunch of polish priests and nuns with him, cuz polish people can cook. and we know the history of pope murders is a realllly long and horrible history. and if you dont, then go learn about it. anyhow, remember the time the pope released doves (the symbols of peace) from his window but they came bak? they came bak cuz the pope is the only man with peace in his heart, cuz this fucking world is filled with evil. evil is swallowing up the world. you know what, maybe its good tat im single. im gonna stay single. im not gonna get married and have kids. nope. whats the point of bringing them into this evil world? they dont deserve to suffer. im gonna go cuz i can feel my heart beats messing up and i need to relax.
1) you just have to make me feel fat, dont you!
2) so what youre a size zero! TAT JUST MEANS YOU HAVE NO BUTT!
3) if youre 103, how the fuck are you supposed to have any boobs?
YOU FUCKING ASS SLUT!!!! YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!!!!
anyway, where was i. oh yeah! then after a few hours there, i came home and zonked out cuz of all my meds. then i went downstairs, ate french fries and chocolate munchkins, and watched my aunt's wedding video. then i talked to sebby some more, and he and his friend bill really cheered me up. then i hooked up my mic and amp to my mixer and played guitar and sang for awhile. then sebby and rach came on, and i felt like sebby was ignoring me and just talking to rach. id say something, and hed respond five minutes later. so i got pissed. cuz rachel, i cant take her. i cant. her goal in life is to take away all my friends and make me feel fucking fat and miserable. and shes all "my life sucks cuz i dont have a boyfriend" WELL NEITHER DO I! BUT MY LIFE SUCKS FOR MORE THAN TAT!!! and then clayton came online and we got into a fight, and its my fault. and i ended up blowing up on him and sebby, ugh. and about the pope. okay. hes the best fucking person on this planet, no-one has done as much good as him. and since i was little i would call him my dobre-dzadzu. and when i was little and i went to poland, i have a video of me meeting him. and i will never ever forget tat. why is the media making such a big deal out of his condition?! this is humiliating to him! put yourself in his shoes! wouldnt you be humiliated if your health ailments were blown up all over the world?! these stupid fucking jewish politicians, we all know jews and catholics do not get along. its like the world is waiting for him to die. and it just breaks my heart even more. do you know how many popes were murdered at the vatican?! the pope before john paul II was poisoned, how do we know that the doctors now wont poison him through his feeding tube or something?! im sure the mafia would do something, i mean, pope john paul II is the first non-italian pope, i wouldnt put it pass them. and i swear to God, if pope john paul didnt have tat surgery earlier, then those doctors wouldnt have messed up his larynx and trachea and esophagus and he wouldnt need tat feeding tube right now. the last time the pope went to the hospital, he took a bunch of polish priests and nuns with him, cuz polish people can cook. and we know the history of pope murders is a realllly long and horrible history. and if you dont, then go learn about it. anyhow, remember the time the pope released doves (the symbols of peace) from his window but they came bak? they came bak cuz the pope is the only man with peace in his heart, cuz this fucking world is filled with evil. evil is swallowing up the world. you know what, maybe its good tat im single. im gonna stay single. im not gonna get married and have kids. nope. whats the point of bringing them into this evil world? they dont deserve to suffer. im gonna go cuz i can feel my heart beats messing up and i need to relax.