(no subject)
I can't sleep.it's almost five in the morning...i'm thinking i'll just stay up so i can call Josh at 7:30 ha.
I don't know how i'm feeling right now..but i'm just glad i'm not sad.
me and Josh are trying to make this work...we're talking again...today was the first day in awhile were we didn't argue..I guess he might come stay with me for a few days then were going to head back to Salinas..hopefully he comesss.
I feel guilty..i don't know why...well i do..but i shouldn't...i feel like i hurt someone...but i don't think it should be my fault...ugh..this isn't coming out right...i'm not making any sense...i hurt a boy...but how can someone depend on someone so much..after only knowing them for a day?I want to be there for him...only becuase i know how it is to have no one there to listen...but sometimes it scares me how much he calls..and txts..and CALLS!...he sent me 33 txt messages today...he seems obsessive...I told him we shouldn't talk anymore..because things were becoming weird...and i said my goodbyes..he cried...and just kept calling...i had to yell...something i hate doing...i hate hurting people..i'm scared he's going to do something stupid..ugh..i don't know what the hell i'm doing anymore.
I wish life was simple.
I wish life came with a manuals guide!!sheesh ha..i'm an idiot..i should go to bedddd.
me and Ashley are like the only people up at this hour ha.
I don't know how i'm feeling right now..but i'm just glad i'm not sad.
me and Josh are trying to make this work...we're talking again...today was the first day in awhile were we didn't argue..I guess he might come stay with me for a few days then were going to head back to Salinas..hopefully he comesss.
I feel guilty..i don't know why...well i do..but i shouldn't...i feel like i hurt someone...but i don't think it should be my fault...ugh..this isn't coming out right...i'm not making any sense...i hurt a boy...but how can someone depend on someone so much..after only knowing them for a day?I want to be there for him...only becuase i know how it is to have no one there to listen...but sometimes it scares me how much he calls..and txts..and CALLS!...he sent me 33 txt messages today...he seems obsessive...I told him we shouldn't talk anymore..because things were becoming weird...and i said my goodbyes..he cried...and just kept calling...i had to yell...something i hate doing...i hate hurting people..i'm scared he's going to do something stupid..ugh..i don't know what the hell i'm doing anymore.
I wish life was simple.
I wish life came with a manuals guide!!sheesh ha..i'm an idiot..i should go to bedddd.
me and Ashley are like the only people up at this hour ha.