i feel like crying!
Well David called me while I was watching a movie with my sister today and I couldn't speak obviously and he sounded so happy so it mad me anxious to talk to him. Once the movie finished I went ahead and called him only to find him kinds bummed and not in the mood to talk which sucks cause the whole movie it was just building up to calling him and then I just get let down... I feel like its my fault which is the worst part because I know it isn't. I feel like just crying but I don't want to because I know there's no reason to. I keep telling myself this lie that I'm okay with not being with him that I don't want him but I'm just lying to myself! I want to be with him so bad I have everyday that I've been trying to be with him marked on a calendar... The worst part is accepting that our anniversary is lost forever it was so special and its gone. God I'm about to break down crying while writing this. I just wish I had something to look forward to like a date when he will come around or something but I just nothing the road isn't done and now I'm following a blind path. Wish I could see the light from here.