(no subject)
I'm sadly looking forward to going back to school. I miss not seeing important people 5 days a week. I miss talking to even the not-so important people 5 days a week. I miss people. No one specifically just...being around people. And not at work...KEY: Not at work.
I'm so sick of work lately...I hate working with Krystle because I midaswell just be working alone. I get no credit for working basically alone when I'm supposed to be working with her....Today was so busy and I think the only sales she did the whole day was when I took my break, I had made over 4 times as much as her when I left. Kind of sad. I'm just looking forward to getting less and less hours...
I want Kymm home..I feel so bad for what I did and I can't even apoligize until he comes home...and then when he comes home..I will still have no was of saying sorry because he will be gone...having fun, without me. I don't expect him to forgive me...I just don't want him to think I'm not sorry....I would feel better about this whole situation if he was just home and we could go out and just talk...about everything...without fighting. All I've thought about since I've dropped him off Friday is HIM..It's just starting to eat away at me...I can't even sleep lately...I think about it right when I'm getting tired, but then I get all upset and I'm awake and then I finally fall asleep and I wake up and think about it more in a half an hour....My mind will not rest until I can say sorry...I just need to see his face and then everything will be fine again..Although I will most likely break down and lose everything left inside of me...then he will jsut sit there and stare at me, thinking about how fucking crazy I am...Which by this entry so far...I feel crazy....I feel crazy without him, I can't even deal with it...That is my life, as sad as it may be to revolve your sanity around someone that never really cared very deeply for you..........I just don't know anymore...Are these nine days over yet? I fought so hard to get him back and lost him so easily.
My car has completely hit the shitters...I fucking hate it...It's embarassing to drive. It squeels so loud when I'm driving down the road that people stop what they're doing and turn around and stare at me...
I'm going up to the land in a few minutes to see the house my mom and fuck-head are putting down...That will be fun..I get to breathe the same air as him..
My mom called Gail Johnson at the clinic to ask her to reccomend a cadiologist (However its spelt) and she's not even in until Thursday...
One more day or work and then two days off in a rooooowwww...I'll most likely go down to dover one day and then I don't know swim around my pool the next day...Nothing too exciting.