(no subject)
ohh man. well. i've been sick this whole week. as much as i love sleeping almost all hours of the day, i miss seeing everyone and being able to go out to see some people<33. ;) . ::sigh:: i don't know what to do. one second I'm stressed and things are crazzy and then the next second i am extremely happy. i guess that's what happens wen u r completely infatuated by this one special person. timing is just not happening. with the house and moving and what's going on...i mean > if it weren't for these sucky circumstances, everything would be PERFECT. althought,i can't complain. i must say that as of now i did get everything i wanted. i've got one special person who i am completely carried away by...and he cares for me so much. he treats me like gold. it's something i never TRULY had before and it is awesome. my friends are awesome. always there n they got my back. things in my life are just leveling out. over these past few months reality kinda slapped me in the face and woke me up a little. i've been weeding out the people in my life who i don't need, and only complicate things...and disregarding them has really helped me. (even thought i originally thought that losing them would be the worst possible thing-but really? it helped me) i've lifted a few things off my chest that i have been itching to get out. (hmm i thought that would just complicate things too and be for the worst-but getting my feelings out reallllly is a positive). the whole bit with the house is almost finalizing...our new place is adorable. as much as THIS has been my home, i feel like it's a beginning to something new and greater in my life that is going to work out for the best. some people who i have neglected, unintentionally, have got in touch, jackie, lucy, courtney, bobby, karissa, and a few others called me which made me smile. soo that's just for starters...
i dk, it sounds complicated..but all my life, really anything that i wanted was given to me...and by having all i wanted it took away that part of me that was able to appreciate..the little things. now that circumstances have changed...my overlook on everything is extremely different. i take a step back and look at my life. and i have soooo much...it's amazing. those little things that i ranted and raved over...are NOTHING compared to my family...my friendships...memories...maybe? love?. ..and fun times. i just wish that people could feel what i feel. because until now...i've really been able to open my eyes. it's simply awesome...yea i've done some things that i'm not exactly proud of. but i don't regret any of it. and i'm glad that i can stop myself from making those bad choices that will make me fuck things up and regret. i just want all my friends to know that you guys are a huge part of who i am...and you all bring out the best in me. ;) you no u who are. lol. just for once. things are working...and little things as well as big things that have changed in my life are finally making it work. so anyone who has doubts about things. toss em out. i thought the same thing...but i just wish i knew what i know now. everythings allright. things will work. as hard as it might be...the war b/w you n friends..u n urself..u n reality..whatever it is. it WILL END and everyone wins in their own way. but things work. i promise. <33 i think thats about it for tonite. cannot wait until tomorrow. i love fridays..n i love my friends. it's gnna b aweeeessome. (bffarlt+5yrs haha it's gonna be great ;) xoxo)
i dk, it sounds complicated..but all my life, really anything that i wanted was given to me...and by having all i wanted it took away that part of me that was able to appreciate..the little things. now that circumstances have changed...my overlook on everything is extremely different. i take a step back and look at my life. and i have soooo much...it's amazing. those little things that i ranted and raved over...are NOTHING compared to my family...my friendships...memories...maybe? love?. ..and fun times. i just wish that people could feel what i feel. because until now...i've really been able to open my eyes. it's simply awesome...yea i've done some things that i'm not exactly proud of. but i don't regret any of it. and i'm glad that i can stop myself from making those bad choices that will make me fuck things up and regret. i just want all my friends to know that you guys are a huge part of who i am...and you all bring out the best in me. ;) you no u who are. lol. just for once. things are working...and little things as well as big things that have changed in my life are finally making it work. so anyone who has doubts about things. toss em out. i thought the same thing...but i just wish i knew what i know now. everythings allright. things will work. as hard as it might be...the war b/w you n friends..u n urself..u n reality..whatever it is. it WILL END and everyone wins in their own way. but things work. i promise. <33 i think thats about it for tonite. cannot wait until tomorrow. i love fridays..n i love my friends. it's gnna b aweeeessome. (bffarlt+5yrs haha it's gonna be great ;) xoxo)