(no subject)

[xteenageriotx]

 Sometimes i can forget that it happend
i can make myself believe that everything is fine
i think i can do that
becuase there is jsut no way i can believe that hes not here anymore
it happend so quick
it was so hard to see him suffer
the strongest man i have ever known just laying there  
I just wish i could hold his hand one more time
or just have another hug and have him never let me go
i miss my dad
I know hes behind me when i dont want to go any further
i know hes with me
but sometimes its just overwhelming
and i dont want to do anything but see him again
i would do anything
He knew how to fix everything
i felt like there was no question he didnt know the answer to
he didnt desearve this
When he wasnt working and i was home from France
he was like his old self
like he was before high school
it was just so good to see him again like that and be able to talk to him
and he made so many jokes and had the biggest smile on his face
he was happy
Hes My Dad
and hes gone
theres no comfort anywhere
i honestly dont know how to deal with this