fuck me, i suck at life
Life has taught me a lot of lessons. Do your best, try real hard, and maybe, just maybe you'll get ahead in life. I also have learned not to rush into things, not to take things for advantage and that you should keep the people you know best closest to you. I recently decided to start a relationship with one of my good friends, however, after analyzing my busy schedule and stuff, I came to the conclusion that I shouldn't be in a relationship with this person. I broke down and told her last night, and she at the time seemed okay with it, but now she doesn't know when and if she'll be able to talk to me anymore. I feel like an asshole, and a loser, and very alone right now. I've officially screwed myself over, for good as far as I am concerned with this person. I have no time to hang with people, no money to do anything, and I work everyday working my ass off while others just sit around and do jack shit. I really can't stand busting my ass at my hellish job (one is okay) anymore. I've worked there too long to be disrespected the way I have. I was working in the cheese dept. all day Thursday, cleaning the olive bar and shelving until they were spotless. I had to go up front to get glass cleaner and I was given a hard time by one kid who thinks he is so special. He walked through the cheese dept later on and I joked with him saying that he should go back up front and do something. He told me to "Fuck Off," and I just pretended I didn't hear it, but I know I did. I really cannot stand the lack of respect from managers, employees, or the like. I don't get respected at my house when I'm trying to sleep, whether it just be during the night or during the day after working an overnight. My dad starts at me in the morning before I have to go to work, setting the tone for the day, my brother fucking wakes me up, everyday, or so it seems and I wish I had money to fucking move into an apartment, but I don't. I have to pay rent every week for something that I am completely unhappy with. Someone please just get me out of this hell hole and/or mundane life that I am currently living. I can't stand it anymore. If you can save me, please let me know....because right now, all I can think right now is that I suck at life and everything I seem to be doing.