Hey there people.
Hey there people, what's going on? I thought that since I had nothing better to do tonight and since I haven't updated in a while, I would do so. Hmm, what to talk about. Well, first off, let's start with good news. As I think I have said before, I have a job now. I've actually been there for almost a month now and it's going pretty good. I've been learning quite a lot of new things and it's been fun. Made some friends, learning a feel for the field, and having fun doing so. I like the paychecks, that's for sure. Umm, I've been looking at places to stay for when I graduate and I think I've found it. It's only going to be about $500 a month and it's in a good neighborhood. I got straight A's this term, so my GPA is going up. This is despite not fully finishing my senior project. But, I got them, and that's the point. Ummm, what else has been good? Not much that I can think of. So, that means on to the not so great things. Well, as I stated a minute ago, I didn't finish my senior project. That SERIOUSLY pissed me off. I thought that we were going to be able to finish it, but unfortunately, due to the fact that I had the job and I wasn't able to be there as much as I could, I wasn't able to finish my part. That's not the only reason we didn't finish it, but the point is we didn't finish it and it seriousl pisses me off. We're going to continue to work on it a little bit and see what we can get out of it by the time we graduate. Also, even though I like this job, it's taking up a lot of time. I'm working 40 hours a week and going to school full time as well. This sucks because I want to be able to go play ball again or hang out with my friends, but I can't. The only day that I have off is Sunday and none of my friends like doing anything on Sundays. Not that I blame them, but I feel bad cause I can't hang out with them. There's also been some rather difficult complications going on at home in Michigan that I'm not to happy about. It's not like I can really do anything about it, but still. Part of me feels like I should be able to. And lastly, the worst thing that is going on recently is the fact that one of my best female friend ever graduated from DeVry recently and she'll be moving out of state on the 4th. I can't tell you how bad this hurts. Not only is she my best female friend, but I fell in love with her hard about 6-7 months ago. I know I shouldn't have because I knew there was a great chance that I wasn't going to have a chance with her, but at the same time, it wasn't something I could control. As wonderful as she is, I'm suprised that every guy isn't falling head over heals to be with her. I went to her graduation and I was almost late, but I ran inside just in time cause I was NOT going to miss her walking across the stage. I also got to meet her parents at graduation, but I was so nervous. I had never been that nervous before. The part that made me really nervous was when I gave her her graduation gift and her parents were looking at me when I was giving it to her. I also gave her two cards; one for graduation and one as a friend. However, the one that I gave to her as a friend also had a long writing in there from me telling her that I've been in love with her and that even though I am in love with her and I know she doesn't feel the same way about me, I want to be her best friend if I can. And the good thing, is that she is mature enough to still be my friend despite how much I like her. Most women I know get terrified and run away if they find out the person they thought was their good friends had other feelings for them than just friendship. I am seriously going to miss her. I have this horrible knot in my stomach and I feel anxious because I know that after yesterday, I don't know when I'll be able to see her again. This truely sucks. I know, or I hope, that we aren't going to lose touch and that we'll be able to chat on the phone from time to time and be able to email/IM each other, but I'm not getting my hopes up. I know that I'll never find anyone like her again and it frightens me. She's better than any woman I could have dreamed of. Well, enough of me talking about stuff that I can't change. I'm going to get offline and go do something lazy. :) Cause I can. I'll talk to you guys later. Have fun and take care. I love you all and God Bless.
Jason Brunskowski
XstreamINsanity