Sorry
This is to everyone that I've been treating like total crap lately... Im soryy ok... Im going through a lot of shit with Christian and everything seems to bother me... Im pretty much loosing the love of my life and all you people can do is bother me about bull shit.. No one knows what im feeling right now except me... Im going through shit that you people prolly have never gone through.. Ya know, its not easy watching your boyfriend leave to chicago not knowing if he's coming back.. And to top it off, not hearing from him at all.. For all i know he could be dead... It hurts... All I hear is bullshit from everyone and i cant take it... No one knows... You tell me that everything is going to be ok.. That he's coming back.. How can you say that?? All your doing is telling me lies... Lieing to my face.. NOTHING is going to be ok.. It just isn't... We all know that..
Christmas is the time of year to be happy.. But i cant be.. .And it sucks... I dont want to be like this... I really dont.. But i cant help it... This Christmas is going to be awfull. Im not going to be able to enjoy it.. Theres no point in getting be presents... Because the only thing that i want, i wont be able to get... All I want for christmas is Christian and i know i wont get him... No body knows how much I love him.. No ones knows how happy i was with him.... Yes, you could all see it but you couldn't feel the way that i felt.. Christian is Gorgous... And for once i actually felt like i ment something to someone... Christian made me feel like i was beautiful... Like i was someone in this world... He told so many people that i was perfect... That he loved me so much and couldn't see his life without me... That i ment EVERYTHING to him... And so much more... When i heard this it made me cry... Because i never thought that I could mean so much to someone like Christian.. I love him so much and cant see my life without him right now... Im so scared and dont know what to do.... And theres no one that can help me right now either because no one has been through what i'm going through..... All i want is Christian... Is that to much to ask for... I want my happiness back, my life...
Christmas is the time of year to be happy.. But i cant be.. .And it sucks... I dont want to be like this... I really dont.. But i cant help it... This Christmas is going to be awfull. Im not going to be able to enjoy it.. Theres no point in getting be presents... Because the only thing that i want, i wont be able to get... All I want for christmas is Christian and i know i wont get him... No body knows how much I love him.. No ones knows how happy i was with him.... Yes, you could all see it but you couldn't feel the way that i felt.. Christian is Gorgous... And for once i actually felt like i ment something to someone... Christian made me feel like i was beautiful... Like i was someone in this world... He told so many people that i was perfect... That he loved me so much and couldn't see his life without me... That i ment EVERYTHING to him... And so much more... When i heard this it made me cry... Because i never thought that I could mean so much to someone like Christian.. I love him so much and cant see my life without him right now... Im so scared and dont know what to do.... And theres no one that can help me right now either because no one has been through what i'm going through..... All i want is Christian... Is that to much to ask for... I want my happiness back, my life...