fuck guys
so help me god, if I ever see him again I'm going to kick his ass...if he doesn't run like a pussy again. amazing how he can sit there and blame me for everything in his life going to shit, but I try to do it and he throws a big drama queen fit, complete with yelling and cursing and making me feel like shit. I'm sorry but no matter how mad you are, things like "I wish you'd just die and go to hell already " and "You're such a fucking stupid fat bitch, why don't you stop eating and lose some god damn weight" are not ok things to say. Any love i still had for him is gone, at least at present. I would be more than happy never to hear from again. I know I will because he wants the money he thinks I owe him (he stuck me with a shitty car under the pretense that if things broke he would fix them, the radiator blew out and it cost $125 to replace[because when he replaced it a few months earlier he bought the cheap one instead of the one that would work well]I offered to pay for part of it because I didn't want to hear him bitch even though he said he'd cover the cost of whatever needed to be fixed). Sucks for him. That just made my weekend most likely more enjoyable as I will now have an extra $125 to spend. He pissed me off enough to make me want to hit him, so I did. It takes a lot now a days to evoke that from me. He can go fuck himself. Fucking self centered egotistical prick. Things started off fine, until he started talking about the vairous girls he's seeing which i asked him not to tell me about. The girl who he's going to go see in san diego again this weekend (that he lied to me about when he went out there before for no reason) because although orange is too far apparently SD is not. Or, and this is what really started my being mad at him last night. He came down here for the purpose of sex. We had alreay decided we were going to keep on with it because it was a good way to have consistent safe sex, however when he tells me after he;s gotten done fucking me that he "really likes Melissa (a girl at his work), but he wouldn't want to just fuck her because she's a nice girl," yeah, i was pissed. I am aware of the fact that everyone thinks I'm a whore. I get that. Even when I don't act the part the thought is still there. But to have him pretty much say "yeah I'm gong to keep fucking you because i respect this other girl too much to do it to her" hurt for one, it was like a big slap in the face, but 2 it just pissed me off that he would be that big of a prick. He told me he had put me above everything so everything in his life had gone to shit. Umm, excuse me? first off I'd like to point out the incident on our effing anniversary last year where working on his truck (nothing that actually needed to be worked on, just detailing it and such) took priority over our anniversary. His parents bought him a mustang to forget about me and he did. Not really looking like he valued me all that much at all. But then oh dear God, I point out that he convinced me to trust and depend on him and he turned around and broke my heart, I point out to him that i stopped hanging out with most of my friends because he wanted me to spend that time with him, I point out that I forced myself to grow up to make him happy, I point out that he pretty much screwed me money wise because stuff keeps going wrong with my car and my parents car really afford to even help out with the cost, and the now extra $60 i have to pay a month for a cell phone plan, I tell him how miserable he's made me and I'm a stupid fat bitch that needs to go die. Fuck men.