this is just a rant.
so my mother's mom is in town and there's a lot of background hostility in this situation that can be summed up in that she accuses me and dad of killing her or whatever. anyway, she calls me and wants to see my little brothers, because dad won't let her see them. so i have to find some time that's conveinent for everybody at a very short notice to sneak her in some visitation time. the boys dont really know her, but i understand that they're wendy's kids and she wants to see them, whatever. well we cant do it today, cause the boys have swim lessons and karate classes, and she starts ranting about how her time is comming and she's going to get the boys, dad's going down, blah blah blah. WTF? so I told her, look, if you wouldn't be such a fucking psyco bitch and accuse him of things and say that you're going to take his kids and such, you might get to fucking see them. so she yells and tells me that the call is taped. so fucking what? i do not have a guilty conscience and i could give two fucks less if she broadcasted it on a megaphone throughout the entire state. she really is a psyco bitch, she comes up with all these conspiracy theories that she can barely keep straight so that she can blame somebody. she wasn't even there, I was, and she tries to tell me that i wasn't, and where i really was and a whole bunch of other bullshit that her other daughter, who claims to have been there but i didn't see, keeps on feeding her. she's a grieving mother. i understand that, but i'm grieving too, and i wish that i had some scapegoat, someone to blame, because i dont like the situation. but i just cant run around and blame everybody for what happened, because the truth hurts. she left, under odd circumstances, yea, but she left. It wasn't like she was some sane person who hasn't left her family before. I love my mother, and always will love my mother, but she wasn't right in the head. she was on god knows what, she left her family, and where i don't believe that we should stop looking for her, I do believe that we should get past the point of blaming each other for everything that happened. I hate not knowing, but it doesn't mean that i should blame someone for it.