life updates = LJ's purpose apparently...
First let me apologize for the last post i made about new orleans, i was perhaps a bit intoxicated when i wrote it, and it is of course horribly grammatically incorrect...
anyhow ive been down here for just about two weeks now. i stopped doing dirty work and started working at the legal collective, which is great, so great in fact that i've decided to come back down (after reece's visit) and stay for awhile, either until my unemployment runs out, or until tammy needs a roommate in nyc (june) either way its a scary scary plunge into nonstable life for me. but after three solid years of doing the grown up thing to the extreme, i figure my soul needs a little youthful rejuvination...
in other news its still crazy down here, i still can't really wrap my emotional brain around the lack of action around here...but i also stopped trying because i think i would curl up into a ball and die if i allowed myself to really comprehend it. but working with the legal collective is great, and its the kind of legal work ive always wanted to do, so that feels really good, even if it is a little confusing to be back in an office, when i swore that that was not what i wanted to do...
but leaving everything behind feels soooo scary to me. and im horribly afraid of being lonely as shit, even though everyone down here is new, and its pretty easy to make friends, i worry i will stop connecting to folks and start feeling really alienated. But so far thats not whats happening, in fact today during a quiet moment while everyone else was hustling and bustling and i was just sitting there alone watching, which is a time when i usually start to feel totally alienated and freaked out (seriously folks, this is me letting you in to my head in a big way) i didn't and i stopped and thought about it, and thought about how i just felt tired, and really appreciative of the people i was with, when did i turn into such a fucking hippy...
anyway what im trying to say is that you should all send me copious amounts of love in the next few months, cause im gonna need it...and it could never be more appreciated...just sayin...
upon a re-read i realize that this is all over the place, but c'mon when have my lj entries ever been anything but....
xo
anyhow ive been down here for just about two weeks now. i stopped doing dirty work and started working at the legal collective, which is great, so great in fact that i've decided to come back down (after reece's visit) and stay for awhile, either until my unemployment runs out, or until tammy needs a roommate in nyc (june) either way its a scary scary plunge into nonstable life for me. but after three solid years of doing the grown up thing to the extreme, i figure my soul needs a little youthful rejuvination...
in other news its still crazy down here, i still can't really wrap my emotional brain around the lack of action around here...but i also stopped trying because i think i would curl up into a ball and die if i allowed myself to really comprehend it. but working with the legal collective is great, and its the kind of legal work ive always wanted to do, so that feels really good, even if it is a little confusing to be back in an office, when i swore that that was not what i wanted to do...
but leaving everything behind feels soooo scary to me. and im horribly afraid of being lonely as shit, even though everyone down here is new, and its pretty easy to make friends, i worry i will stop connecting to folks and start feeling really alienated. But so far thats not whats happening, in fact today during a quiet moment while everyone else was hustling and bustling and i was just sitting there alone watching, which is a time when i usually start to feel totally alienated and freaked out (seriously folks, this is me letting you in to my head in a big way) i didn't and i stopped and thought about it, and thought about how i just felt tired, and really appreciative of the people i was with, when did i turn into such a fucking hippy...
anyway what im trying to say is that you should all send me copious amounts of love in the next few months, cause im gonna need it...and it could never be more appreciated...just sayin...
upon a re-read i realize that this is all over the place, but c'mon when have my lj entries ever been anything but....
xo