september the 11th
well. i watched this documentary that was on channel 4 tonight. it was so graphic. and it made me think. what if that had been buffalo. what if that had happened to my city. i mean NYC is my city, but its not my hometown city like buffalo is. its kinda scary to think that those planes crashed 6 hours away from me. thats really close. thats not a long time. i can remember that day too. i was sitting in my earth science class with julia. we were working on a paper on the back counter. and all of a sudden buggs comes over the PA and tells us what happened. i got freaked out cause my dad was supposed to go to NYC soon and i didnt know if he had gone or not.
i remember everyone just feeling so lost and not knowing what to do. it was like walking in a daze. there were TVs on at each corner of the school. the TVs in the guidence office were on, they didnt ahve them in the cafeteria yet but they were on in there in the corner of the room.
those memories are so vivid yet so surreal. alot of my life feels like its surreal latley. like when Carol died. it still hasnt hit me. it still hasnt hit me that Papa is gone either. and its been 9 months since it happened. God, 9 months since two important people in my life died. everything is a daze and i hate it. i feel like im partly detatched from the real world. i live in my own world, in my dream. im so afraid of this all not being real either. i mean. i got the best kiss of my life 2 weeks ago. i mean, the best.
and i dont wanna wake up one day and find that its not real. i want this all to be real to me. i want this all to be real and i want to feel it. i dont want to walk around in a daze anymore
WAKE UP STUPID
i remember everyone just feeling so lost and not knowing what to do. it was like walking in a daze. there were TVs on at each corner of the school. the TVs in the guidence office were on, they didnt ahve them in the cafeteria yet but they were on in there in the corner of the room.
those memories are so vivid yet so surreal. alot of my life feels like its surreal latley. like when Carol died. it still hasnt hit me. it still hasnt hit me that Papa is gone either. and its been 9 months since it happened. God, 9 months since two important people in my life died. everything is a daze and i hate it. i feel like im partly detatched from the real world. i live in my own world, in my dream. im so afraid of this all not being real either. i mean. i got the best kiss of my life 2 weeks ago. i mean, the best.
and i dont wanna wake up one day and find that its not real. i want this all to be real to me. i want this all to be real and i want to feel it. i dont want to walk around in a daze anymore
WAKE UP STUPID