I spend my days worried out loud, at least in my head, then choke 'em back down.

[xovernowx]

I can't keep choking back my tears. it hurts. and it doesn't help that I feel lonely. like no one [outside of those in my home] can bother to see how I am or try to make me smile. like they believe that I am ok, even though it's only been a month and it's Christmas time. don't you know me better than that. don't you care more than that?

the novelty of New Years Eve is completely wasted on me. I don't drink. I don't enjoy sitting around watching others drink. I could stay up/out everynight if I so desired. blah blah blah. my life is one big new years eve...how thrilling.

my alkaline trio cd has been lost for months. monthssssssssss. I want to find it.