Guilt is overwhelming
Just came back from the hospital to find out that my grandmother has no chance of making it. And what were doing is just prolonging her death and causing her more pain. So tomorrow we have to decide what "date" we want to let her go into eternal sleep. Ive cried for 3 hours straight. I dont know what to do. It hurts so much. I never saw her and i should have, no the guilt is catching up with me.
Today i told her my goodbyes. I told her i loved her and that i was sorry for not seeing her all the time. That she is welcome to go if she wants, and ill miss her. But when she gets there can she tell grandpa hi and that i love him. That i will see her there soon enough. And that i loved her.
So it really hit me now. I will no longer have the sweet little lemme run around everywhere 92 year old grandma that i loved. It really hit me. I dont know what to do...
Today i told her my goodbyes. I told her i loved her and that i was sorry for not seeing her all the time. That she is welcome to go if she wants, and ill miss her. But when she gets there can she tell grandpa hi and that i love him. That i will see her there soon enough. And that i loved her.
So it really hit me now. I will no longer have the sweet little lemme run around everywhere 92 year old grandma that i loved. It really hit me. I dont know what to do...