she said im not normal, and i should give boys a chance.
Mom-
When you die, would you rather have loved who your parents wanted you to love, or who you really loved? Obviously, if you have any heart, you would choose the latter, and so do I. I think it is very sick on your part to turn on Bridget now, when last week you were giving her an Easter basket. We are not breaking up, I am just jealous that she has a new friend. That is normal. At least I’m honest. Reread the letter she gave you regarding her loving me. She meant every word of it. If she didn’t, she would not have stuck around for 1 year and 7 months. I have seen her every day since October of my senior year, I have told her more than I have ever told anyone, and she has done the same. She did not have many friends in high school because they were all as narrow-minded about her looks as you have been. She met this guy at her work who is as passionate about food as she is, and she wants to spend time with him. This is her first real friend, I am just jealous. I am trying to give her space, and it is hard. We are not breaking up, and she is not going anywhere. Even if she were to no longer be for any reason, I love women. I dated Louis, Jason, Shawn, and Tre in high school and found them to be entirely unfulfilling emotionally and in every other facet of human emotion. Besides that, I cheated on them with other girls. Obviously, I find women to be better, and they have more of a capacity to love, in my eyes. I think the only people who are not normal are those who don’t love anyone at all. I love Bridget, and she loves me, and we are together. I thought you had accepted that? If you find it makes you feel better to tell your own daughter she’s not normal, and for her to deny her own heart in order to please her mother’s petty friends, then fine. But I’m not changing. Also, I believe there are many other qualities I have, I am not just my relationship status. I thought maybe you knew that. I will live with Bridget eventually, and you will have to accept that also. It is 45 miles from here to UNO and back, and that is ridiculous. It is only 5 miles from Bridget’s place, the same thing with work. There are women all over the world who choose to live together, and some even adopt and raise children together. And their children are healthy! And normal! I know some of them! Accept this. I love Bridget and I do not want to get married to a man. I don’t want kids. If that changes, I’ll adopt. Then me and my child will have something in common. On that note, Bridget took me to Charity Hospital recently to find out the name of my parents. I talked to a woman in the psych ward who had worked with my father (and Mrs. Vesterfelt). His name was Steven Smith. He was a short, quiet man and he looked just like me. Him and my mother walked from their house in the French quarter to Charity Hospital with me and my twin sister. He tried to give her CPR but she died. My mother left and went to New York. He left alos, and when he got to New York and could not find her, he killed himself. All this time I thought my mother left me because I wouldn’t have a father. Turns out I was not even that important. This has affected me in a huge way, but you would never know. You only asked how I was today because you talked to Nana and she told you what happened. Otherwise, you would have gone about your life, not noticing or caring what was happening in my life. And that’s fine, I understand that your sick and I know your life is very hard. I know you don’t like your job anymore, it’s too exhausting, and your disappointed with your kids. I’m sorry. I do love you, you are my mother, you accepted me when my own biological mother did not. I thank you for everything you have ever done for me, but do not make me feel ashamed about who I choose to love. Bridget makes me happy. Be glad for me.
When you die, would you rather have loved who your parents wanted you to love, or who you really loved? Obviously, if you have any heart, you would choose the latter, and so do I. I think it is very sick on your part to turn on Bridget now, when last week you were giving her an Easter basket. We are not breaking up, I am just jealous that she has a new friend. That is normal. At least I’m honest. Reread the letter she gave you regarding her loving me. She meant every word of it. If she didn’t, she would not have stuck around for 1 year and 7 months. I have seen her every day since October of my senior year, I have told her more than I have ever told anyone, and she has done the same. She did not have many friends in high school because they were all as narrow-minded about her looks as you have been. She met this guy at her work who is as passionate about food as she is, and she wants to spend time with him. This is her first real friend, I am just jealous. I am trying to give her space, and it is hard. We are not breaking up, and she is not going anywhere. Even if she were to no longer be for any reason, I love women. I dated Louis, Jason, Shawn, and Tre in high school and found them to be entirely unfulfilling emotionally and in every other facet of human emotion. Besides that, I cheated on them with other girls. Obviously, I find women to be better, and they have more of a capacity to love, in my eyes. I think the only people who are not normal are those who don’t love anyone at all. I love Bridget, and she loves me, and we are together. I thought you had accepted that? If you find it makes you feel better to tell your own daughter she’s not normal, and for her to deny her own heart in order to please her mother’s petty friends, then fine. But I’m not changing. Also, I believe there are many other qualities I have, I am not just my relationship status. I thought maybe you knew that. I will live with Bridget eventually, and you will have to accept that also. It is 45 miles from here to UNO and back, and that is ridiculous. It is only 5 miles from Bridget’s place, the same thing with work. There are women all over the world who choose to live together, and some even adopt and raise children together. And their children are healthy! And normal! I know some of them! Accept this. I love Bridget and I do not want to get married to a man. I don’t want kids. If that changes, I’ll adopt. Then me and my child will have something in common. On that note, Bridget took me to Charity Hospital recently to find out the name of my parents. I talked to a woman in the psych ward who had worked with my father (and Mrs. Vesterfelt). His name was Steven Smith. He was a short, quiet man and he looked just like me. Him and my mother walked from their house in the French quarter to Charity Hospital with me and my twin sister. He tried to give her CPR but she died. My mother left and went to New York. He left alos, and when he got to New York and could not find her, he killed himself. All this time I thought my mother left me because I wouldn’t have a father. Turns out I was not even that important. This has affected me in a huge way, but you would never know. You only asked how I was today because you talked to Nana and she told you what happened. Otherwise, you would have gone about your life, not noticing or caring what was happening in my life. And that’s fine, I understand that your sick and I know your life is very hard. I know you don’t like your job anymore, it’s too exhausting, and your disappointed with your kids. I’m sorry. I do love you, you are my mother, you accepted me when my own biological mother did not. I thank you for everything you have ever done for me, but do not make me feel ashamed about who I choose to love. Bridget makes me happy. Be glad for me.