(no subject)
Dear Livejournal,
I'm in Arkansas, and boy is it HOT HOT HOT. I'm having a good ole' time here. My girlfriend moved to New York last week. She's really sad to be apart from me. I miss her but so far I'm pretty ok. I feel somewhat guilty that I'm not more broken up about it. I'm sure it'll hit me harder in a week or two.
I don't have a single other friend in Little Rock, but I have so many family members around that I'm not too lonely. Still, I really ought to get out there and make a friend or two. As Pedro The Lion was wont to say: It's hard to find a friend. I miss living with Alec and Devion. Alec, you're one of the 3-4 people who might possibly read this someday, so I'd like to take this opportunity to give you an online WAZZZAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
I realized a few nights ago that I hadn't prayed in a long time, so I went ahead and did it. The Lord is so disarming. Not always in a comfortable way. I realize sometimes that I'm talking to The Almighty as though he were an equal, someone I can subtly manipulate and prop myself up to. In realizing that, humility comes naturally, because I feel like a such and such. I'm embarrassed at the way I carry myself with God, and then I realize I am embarrassed at the way I treat other people. You see, the thing is, I want people to think I'm really cool. I hope they like me, but that's pretty secondary. For most of my life I was very unsure of myself, and now for some reason I've really bought into what I project to the world. I'm not proposing that the Christian thing is to be down on myself, but yeah kind of. If not that, then at least second guessing my intentions is a Christian reflex that has forced me to grow spiritually, and its something I've unlearned for the most part. I think a bit more humiliation at the throne of God would do me good, that's my prayer for the moment.
If anyone is out there, God Bless you, and I probably miss you.
I'm in Arkansas, and boy is it HOT HOT HOT. I'm having a good ole' time here. My girlfriend moved to New York last week. She's really sad to be apart from me. I miss her but so far I'm pretty ok. I feel somewhat guilty that I'm not more broken up about it. I'm sure it'll hit me harder in a week or two.
I don't have a single other friend in Little Rock, but I have so many family members around that I'm not too lonely. Still, I really ought to get out there and make a friend or two. As Pedro The Lion was wont to say: It's hard to find a friend. I miss living with Alec and Devion. Alec, you're one of the 3-4 people who might possibly read this someday, so I'd like to take this opportunity to give you an online WAZZZAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
I realized a few nights ago that I hadn't prayed in a long time, so I went ahead and did it. The Lord is so disarming. Not always in a comfortable way. I realize sometimes that I'm talking to The Almighty as though he were an equal, someone I can subtly manipulate and prop myself up to. In realizing that, humility comes naturally, because I feel like a such and such. I'm embarrassed at the way I carry myself with God, and then I realize I am embarrassed at the way I treat other people. You see, the thing is, I want people to think I'm really cool. I hope they like me, but that's pretty secondary. For most of my life I was very unsure of myself, and now for some reason I've really bought into what I project to the world. I'm not proposing that the Christian thing is to be down on myself, but yeah kind of. If not that, then at least second guessing my intentions is a Christian reflex that has forced me to grow spiritually, and its something I've unlearned for the most part. I think a bit more humiliation at the throne of God would do me good, that's my prayer for the moment.
If anyone is out there, God Bless you, and I probably miss you.