Too young for tattoos and real men
Alright so it's been a while since I truly updated. Like really said what’s going on in this head of mine and completely laid out all my problems. So here it goes, completely bare no holding back.
There’s been a lot going on lately that of which I don't share with everybody, and that of which I share too much of with everybody. My mind is a complete chaotic hellhole right now. Some of it I can't really stand to bare any longer. I have been dealing with the fact that I'm single for far to long now. I can't really cope with that fact that now Shane is not coming back for sure. We all know how much I need him and really none of you know exactly how much I truly need him around me. Whenever I seem to find someone new someone I could be with and be happy with it all goes wrong. I'm not talking about petty shit like oh they want me to go out with him and she want me to go out with this guy and I like neither of them. I'm talking about real issues as in I've fallen for them and they don't want me, they already have someone, or they're too old for me. That one I seem to get myself in trouble with them most. Yes you all know about Adam, and teddy and so on. So honestly I see no problem with dating older guys. I know societies views on it but honestly society’s pretty fucked so I really don't give a shit what society has to say about who I am allowed to love or like. You can help whom you’re attracted to. I happen to like guys with brains who can think for themselves. I like mature guys, who actually know what the hell is going on. The boys my age have no idea how to be any of that and half of them don't have a brain. So why settle for a boy with no brain and not be happy, when I could be with guy whom is everything I want and more? I don't care about age. Fuck it its just a number. If I find what I'm looking for in someone whose 16 or 17 then amazing I will be the happiest person in the world. But until then I only see what I want in older guys. Yes this is a problem in many of your eyes but hey, I’m not going to settle for being unhappy. If I have to be unhappy for the next couple of years because I have to wait until I’m old enough to be with someone so be it but I'm not going to settle. Sorry but people have really been giving me shit lately for this. Here a message for all of you who have. FUCK YOU no one controls me but me.
Moving on with other issues I've been dealing with. Tattoos, yes tattoos I said it. I've made some of you aware with this issue already but for those that can't keep up here you go. I am too young in the state of Maine to "legally" get inked. So my over protective mother decided she doesn’t want me having one. So I decided I'm not going to wait until she says its ok. Excuse me but the last time I checked she doesn't walk around in MY skin every day of her life now doses she? Just because the government says she owns me until I'm 18 doesn't mean I agree or am going to abide by that. Fuck that shit the government can kiss my ass. It’s a tattoo for fuck sake. Ink put into MY skin. A perminate mark yes, but that’s the point. So when my brother decides what he wants I'm going to get one with him. He just needs to hurry up because I'm a little to impatient but I made a promise to him and myself that he would be there when I got one and I think I'm going to let him get one before I do. Just because well if you can't figure it out then whatever I don't feel like typing it all out.
I wish that when people talked they would use a higher vocabulary. Talk as if you had higher grade of education than 6th grade. Instead of saying hott, or cute when talking about a guy, say handsome. Instead of saying fine when referring to a girl say something like beautiful or gorgeous. It just seems to me that today’s language has been dumped up quite a bit. And frankly it’s annoying. I've also heard people using aim terms in real life conversations. What the hell is that? You can't take the two seconds to say just kidding you actually have to say JK. I was in a class the other day and I used a word, not a big or complex word, but the kid actually was like "Whoa can you speak English, damn man I ain’t smart!” Ok well for one, I'm not a man so don't ever refer to me as one again, my reproductive organs are on the inside, and two it was English, good, proper English. Something today’s teens know nothing about apparently. Maybe instead of asking me to rephrase my statement maybe you could try to ask what that word means. And I don’t know, up your vocabulary level a little.
There’s been a lot going on lately that of which I don't share with everybody, and that of which I share too much of with everybody. My mind is a complete chaotic hellhole right now. Some of it I can't really stand to bare any longer. I have been dealing with the fact that I'm single for far to long now. I can't really cope with that fact that now Shane is not coming back for sure. We all know how much I need him and really none of you know exactly how much I truly need him around me. Whenever I seem to find someone new someone I could be with and be happy with it all goes wrong. I'm not talking about petty shit like oh they want me to go out with him and she want me to go out with this guy and I like neither of them. I'm talking about real issues as in I've fallen for them and they don't want me, they already have someone, or they're too old for me. That one I seem to get myself in trouble with them most. Yes you all know about Adam, and teddy and so on. So honestly I see no problem with dating older guys. I know societies views on it but honestly society’s pretty fucked so I really don't give a shit what society has to say about who I am allowed to love or like. You can help whom you’re attracted to. I happen to like guys with brains who can think for themselves. I like mature guys, who actually know what the hell is going on. The boys my age have no idea how to be any of that and half of them don't have a brain. So why settle for a boy with no brain and not be happy, when I could be with guy whom is everything I want and more? I don't care about age. Fuck it its just a number. If I find what I'm looking for in someone whose 16 or 17 then amazing I will be the happiest person in the world. But until then I only see what I want in older guys. Yes this is a problem in many of your eyes but hey, I’m not going to settle for being unhappy. If I have to be unhappy for the next couple of years because I have to wait until I’m old enough to be with someone so be it but I'm not going to settle. Sorry but people have really been giving me shit lately for this. Here a message for all of you who have. FUCK YOU no one controls me but me.
Moving on with other issues I've been dealing with. Tattoos, yes tattoos I said it. I've made some of you aware with this issue already but for those that can't keep up here you go. I am too young in the state of Maine to "legally" get inked. So my over protective mother decided she doesn’t want me having one. So I decided I'm not going to wait until she says its ok. Excuse me but the last time I checked she doesn't walk around in MY skin every day of her life now doses she? Just because the government says she owns me until I'm 18 doesn't mean I agree or am going to abide by that. Fuck that shit the government can kiss my ass. It’s a tattoo for fuck sake. Ink put into MY skin. A perminate mark yes, but that’s the point. So when my brother decides what he wants I'm going to get one with him. He just needs to hurry up because I'm a little to impatient but I made a promise to him and myself that he would be there when I got one and I think I'm going to let him get one before I do. Just because well if you can't figure it out then whatever I don't feel like typing it all out.
I wish that when people talked they would use a higher vocabulary. Talk as if you had higher grade of education than 6th grade. Instead of saying hott, or cute when talking about a guy, say handsome. Instead of saying fine when referring to a girl say something like beautiful or gorgeous. It just seems to me that today’s language has been dumped up quite a bit. And frankly it’s annoying. I've also heard people using aim terms in real life conversations. What the hell is that? You can't take the two seconds to say just kidding you actually have to say JK. I was in a class the other day and I used a word, not a big or complex word, but the kid actually was like "Whoa can you speak English, damn man I ain’t smart!” Ok well for one, I'm not a man so don't ever refer to me as one again, my reproductive organs are on the inside, and two it was English, good, proper English. Something today’s teens know nothing about apparently. Maybe instead of asking me to rephrase my statement maybe you could try to ask what that word means. And I don’t know, up your vocabulary level a little.