(no subject)
umm... so i havent been able to really do much with my livejournal. until today of course. as you can see, i changed my layout... several times trying to get them to work. i think i am going to have to delete a couple of my online journals because it is hard to keep up with them all and write something different in each one. i quit. hah... umm...yeah
i just got out of the pool, and showered, again. not that anyone really needs to know that. i should probably make some lunch for my brothers and i. i am not supposed to use the phone. i just got grounded last night.<<< if you want to know why i will leave it under a cut.
i went to six flags yesterday... if you want to hear about that i will put that under the cut too.
i need to see some of my friends like danielle, jenn, alex, ian, and christina. i havent seen those people in a long time. they probably think i am avoiding them or something. which i am totally not. its just that i just got ungrounded not too long ago so i was trying to see my nick as much as possible. its not that i forgot about my friends or disowned them for a short time of being, i just really needed to see nick. i am going to start making plans again to hang out with people but continue hanging out with nick at the same time. yeah, i hope i can manage this.
nick (this is to you):
im really sorry about today. i am just fed up with my dad already. and its only been like one day. what the hell. i know i shouldnt take my anger out on you... but its just so easy since you are the only one that i express my feelings to. i know i was being a bitch on the phone and i apologize. and i know you just called me back, and i didnt answer. i just dont want to talk to you until i calm down. I AM NOT MAD AT YOU. i just wanted you to know that. i love you with all of my heart!!
jenn (this is to you):
sorry that i havent been much of a friend lately. i havent called or even informed you of me being ungrounded. what the hell is wrong with me? i love you. you are my closest friend and the most understanding person i know. we have been through so much together and i dont want to just let that slowly evaporate. "i love you man!" (said very sappily. ha ha ha) we will hang out soon. sometime after sunday of this weekend. you will have to come to our block party next saturday!! i will invite a couple of friends and nick of course.
danielle (this is to you):
i dont think you are going to get this anytime soon... but i love you too!! call me so we can talk about things... and uh, yeah.
well... enough of that shit. (not saying that it means shit to me just saying its so pathetic that i have to say this online instead of in person.)
hear is the cut if you want to read.
Before:
i wake up around 4:30 because i didnt sleep very well. so i go online for a bit fixing my music files on real player and windows media player and download some music off of limewire. then i go take a shower, call nick. then i had to hang up because my dad had come back home for like ten minutes. then as soon as he left over came ray (oh yeah i went with ray, ethan, and jeff to six flags). we ate some cereal together and then went off into the garage to grab a cooler for the subs we were going to purchase over at the subway. i dropped off my brother at the sitters house and then we went back to rays to grab some pops and waters. then we headed off the ethan and jeffs house to pick them up. then we were on our way to six flags... we had our navigator: ethan our music selector: me (of course) and our driver: ray. jeff did nothing. we didnt get lost but we had to make lots o pit stops... we had to find a bank one, get ice, get a car wash (which was shit), and go to subway.
During:
when we arrived at six flags we rode like all of the rides at least twice. everyone was at the hurricane harbor (the waterpark in the six flags) because it was so effin hot out. it was lots of fun. i like to hang out with ray and ethan they are really cool. though ray can become a bit annoying after some time. and jeff, he was just there. after riding the batman twice in a row i got really sick. the whole day i had felt woosy and lightheaded and shit. i am sensitive to the light. any light, not just the sun, but anything that is too bright. (ever since i broke my jaw, this is how i have been) well the doctor said it had something to do with my energy dont ask me how. hah. so after riding batman twice in a row i waited as they went on a third time. i was falling over so i rested against the wall feeling as if i was about to faint. i didnt want to make a big deal so i just kind of tryed to shake it off i guess and they got off and we walked over to the little stand to get free water. we had been drinking water like every hour. it was insane. i couldnt take it anymore. i couldnt have another cup of liquid with no taste. i needed something other than water. so i bought some sprite. it was too late. i took one sip and then i barfed in my mouth, nobody noticed until i walked over to the garbage can and spit out the vomit. it was soooo sick. i was soooo dehydrated. so i finished my sprite and felt fine. so we continued riding all of the coasters. then the last ride we went on was the superman. which is like one of my favorites. i know it isnt thrilling or scary or anything like that, that usually makes it someones favorite roller coaster but i like it because it is fun. so... not that that was important sorry. i am getting off subject.
After:
we left the six flags and went to joes crab shack for some dinner. we got there at like 8 at night and stayed until like 10ish. then we headed home for our one hour and 15 minute ride home. we had to stop to get gas, a new car wash since the other one was shit, and drop off ethan and jeff. when we dropped off ethan we stayed there for like twenty or thirty minutes. then ray dropped me off at my house. when i got in i knew i was in trouble. my dad was pissed. though i had called him 4 times that day it wasnt enough. i called him when we left for six flags, when we got there, when we left six flags and went to joes, and then once we were at ethans. he didnt answer on my last phone call from ethans house. i got the answering machine at the house. when i had called him from joes crab shack it was like 8. and when i had gotten home it was like 11:50ish. so four hours without hearing a word from me. if i were a parent i would be worried, not mad. well maybe a little mad but not as mad as he was. it was his fault. on the phone he asked how long it would take to get home and i told him and 1 and 30 minutes becasue we had to get gas and a car wash on the way home. i did forget to tell him that we had to drop off two people. but he didnt ask when we were leaving the restaurant and when we thought we would be home. and he ASSUMED (which they tell me NEVER to assume because it makes an ass out of you and me) that we would be home by like 10:30 or 11:30 the latest. well obviously his assumption was very wrong. so he was pissed at me. and he was like "four hours i didnt hear from you, kid. that is the lack of responsibility we talk about katlan. you obviously dont care... and ethan called from wherever his house or his cell or something about the time you said you were over there." and at the point i had to interrupt because i had forgotten to tell him that i tryed to call him when i was at ethans on his cell because my cell was in rays car. and then he said "oh so now you did try to call now that i mentioned ethan called?" and i said "no, i just remembered now. why did you talk to him?" he replyed "no." and i said..."see i did try calling. that was me. but i got the answering machine. the phone only rang once." and he said "ok, sure" and then that pissed me off because (nick this is what i was about to say on the phone that i wouldnt tell you) i havent lied to my parents in like a week. that is a long time for me. well probably more than a week like two or three weeks. but i do dishonest things behind their back like invite nick over when no one is home and have drinks every now and then, but that is it. i havent lied in forever. so why would he think i was lying. i mean that really pissed me off. so when i went to get up to leave he said "sit your fucking ass down kid! i am not done talking to you about this!!" and i forgot what i said but it pissed him off and then he said "you know what i am done with you just go to your fucking bed." so i did. but he continued rambling on about how i suck at life (not literally but just how i was mouthing off to him or something and why i hadnt called and my "so called lie") so i just drowned him out with my anger and just grabbed my shit and went into my room and went to sleep. oh and he took my phone away before we started talking (that is why i knew i was in trouble) and he also told me right away that i wouldnt be continuing any further with my plans for the weekend (going to nicks dads house on saturday to watch the fight). so i was pretty pissed for the rest of the night and fell asleep with anger in my system... which is never healthy for me because the next day i am always a fucking bitch. and i dont mean to be. i am just a stupid emo kid inside. but on the outside i am this happy little mother fucker who seems to not give a fuck when people try to care for me, are mad at me, or when i am hurt. but really i am that emo kid who gets really emotional when no one else is around. it is ridiculous. and the only reason why i am two different people is because i dont like that emo part. i dont want people to see what i am feeling. i dont want people to be able to read me. i dont want to be read.