Today I went outside and wrote all of my thoughts down.
It was so therapeutic and refreshing. All brought on by the beautiful day and the subject of Glenn's class making me smile all class long and afterwards. I'm posting this for posterity, in case I lose the paper it's written on. Hope everyone's day was as amazing as mine. I thought about all of you today, and prayed for each of you. It was just one of those perfectly peaceful days.
Today is perfection. Not perfect, but perfection. Whenever something is dubbed perfect, it's implied that that something measures up to that quintessential "World of Forms" idea- the best of whatever is. This, today, is that best.
Perfection.
Today I am wearing jeans and a tank top. I would also be comfortable in shorts. Or a sweater. Today is comfort. Today is stillness, but with a breeze. I love the chimes, but today I'd rather silence. It's five o'clock. My only want right now is a pillow for my back; this bench is pretty stiff. Rustic. The bench is rustic, and beautiful in its chipped paint, sharp-edged splendor. The paint looks like it was once white, now gray, and chipped away to expose wood. It looks as if the one I'm sitting on has been the most loved. The two to its right look newer, less wood showing. I definitely prefer loved and worn-in. Comfortable. Today is comfort.
There are brick pillars all around, in two circles, supporting the spiderweb pattern of planks creating the arbor. One of my favorite things in the world is this criss-crossed, draping, overhanging ivy that's serving as my roof presently. Tree-like vines have grown up beside each pillar and entwine the planks above my head. They look fake, but I know they aren't, and what a wonder they are. Like living creatures, they grow and breathe and find support in their surroundings. There's greenery all around me, and fall's first claim of leaves in a pile on the ground beneath my feet.
Independence- I feel it right here and now. I am not grown up, by any means, but I feel very much established as my own person. Gone are the days when my high school friends helped make me who I am. I've been shaped and now is when others view me as a solid, take me or leave me, but not try to change me. My family is far away, but they have molded me well enough to know what they would say or think at any given point in my life. I'll hear their voices in every situation I'm thrown into. I'm not looking for a guy to make me happy. This is not a good time for me to balance a new relationship with the inexperienced present that is college. Ample time needs to be allowed before any guy decides whether or not he really likes my true colors. The people I've met have only known me for a month. My friends of seven years are still learning about me. I'm not jumping into anything. Rather, I'll take every day as an opportunity and every person I want to get to know better as a blessing. Twice blessed for those who want to get to know me as well. My only search right now shall be a search for my passion. I don't know in what area of study my heart lies, and that is my moment's concentration. And I am content.
I'm so peaceful right now, minus the slats of this bench making sitting uncomfortable and the occassional pestering bite of an ant or mosquito. I wonder, is it body temperature that determines how pleasant the air outside is? People are all different, hot and cold natured and everywhere in between, but everyone seems to agree about how amazing the weather today is. To me that can only mean that this temperature, breeze, and feeling transcend the physical and go straight for the spiritual. Days like these are a gift to the soul.
I almost thought Philosophy would break me. But Philosophy is aimed for the skeptics. It's fine to ask questions, but not to the point that things begin to lose beauty. As John Lachs said, we are in love with life. I am in love with my life. I love living and dancing and walking and laughing, and, as Glenn said, sneezing and clouds and putting on my favorite pair of jeans, and I love just sitting here, marveling, taking it all in and being in awe of what I see. This paper, this moment, rereading this will never be so beautiful as it is right now. Never will the sunlight be cast upon the page in this same way, and never will shadows of leaves dance across my words as they are now.
The now is what I am in awe of. The now is all I am. Yesterday is gone, a memory, and tomorrow will always be yet to exist. I am now. Now is this beauty that surrounds me, and it is all I need.
Today is perfection. Not perfect, but perfection. Whenever something is dubbed perfect, it's implied that that something measures up to that quintessential "World of Forms" idea- the best of whatever is. This, today, is that best.
Perfection.
Today I am wearing jeans and a tank top. I would also be comfortable in shorts. Or a sweater. Today is comfort. Today is stillness, but with a breeze. I love the chimes, but today I'd rather silence. It's five o'clock. My only want right now is a pillow for my back; this bench is pretty stiff. Rustic. The bench is rustic, and beautiful in its chipped paint, sharp-edged splendor. The paint looks like it was once white, now gray, and chipped away to expose wood. It looks as if the one I'm sitting on has been the most loved. The two to its right look newer, less wood showing. I definitely prefer loved and worn-in. Comfortable. Today is comfort.
There are brick pillars all around, in two circles, supporting the spiderweb pattern of planks creating the arbor. One of my favorite things in the world is this criss-crossed, draping, overhanging ivy that's serving as my roof presently. Tree-like vines have grown up beside each pillar and entwine the planks above my head. They look fake, but I know they aren't, and what a wonder they are. Like living creatures, they grow and breathe and find support in their surroundings. There's greenery all around me, and fall's first claim of leaves in a pile on the ground beneath my feet.
Independence- I feel it right here and now. I am not grown up, by any means, but I feel very much established as my own person. Gone are the days when my high school friends helped make me who I am. I've been shaped and now is when others view me as a solid, take me or leave me, but not try to change me. My family is far away, but they have molded me well enough to know what they would say or think at any given point in my life. I'll hear their voices in every situation I'm thrown into. I'm not looking for a guy to make me happy. This is not a good time for me to balance a new relationship with the inexperienced present that is college. Ample time needs to be allowed before any guy decides whether or not he really likes my true colors. The people I've met have only known me for a month. My friends of seven years are still learning about me. I'm not jumping into anything. Rather, I'll take every day as an opportunity and every person I want to get to know better as a blessing. Twice blessed for those who want to get to know me as well. My only search right now shall be a search for my passion. I don't know in what area of study my heart lies, and that is my moment's concentration. And I am content.
I'm so peaceful right now, minus the slats of this bench making sitting uncomfortable and the occassional pestering bite of an ant or mosquito. I wonder, is it body temperature that determines how pleasant the air outside is? People are all different, hot and cold natured and everywhere in between, but everyone seems to agree about how amazing the weather today is. To me that can only mean that this temperature, breeze, and feeling transcend the physical and go straight for the spiritual. Days like these are a gift to the soul.
I almost thought Philosophy would break me. But Philosophy is aimed for the skeptics. It's fine to ask questions, but not to the point that things begin to lose beauty. As John Lachs said, we are in love with life. I am in love with my life. I love living and dancing and walking and laughing, and, as Glenn said, sneezing and clouds and putting on my favorite pair of jeans, and I love just sitting here, marveling, taking it all in and being in awe of what I see. This paper, this moment, rereading this will never be so beautiful as it is right now. Never will the sunlight be cast upon the page in this same way, and never will shadows of leaves dance across my words as they are now.
The now is what I am in awe of. The now is all I am. Yesterday is gone, a memory, and tomorrow will always be yet to exist. I am now. Now is this beauty that surrounds me, and it is all I need.