she said what?? and i told her that i didnt know...
wellpp its tuesday and what do ya know?? i have time to write...
sunday i ended up going to the movies w/kiana & laura...which was funny cause theyre a riot. we saw alot like love whichhh was definately not up to my standards but i guess it was alrright. afterwards we waited for a ride for abbout an hour and just got food and hung out...then i came home andddd did more homework...yessss. talked to josh for an hour and a half and he knew that shit was gonna hit the fan soon...and i told him he could make a decision to fix eeverything but hes made up his mind. theres nothing i can do now and i feel so helpless but what can ya do. i know this kids making a huge mistake and im gonna be hearing about it for the next year or so. and hes gonna ask for comfort from me and even though i told him it would happen, i have this weakness for him that i just cant let him go and i know that ill give him the comfort he needs but GOD DAMNIT he frusterates me so much.
k, glad i got that out...that felt a little better haha, most of you dont know the story but w/e...ill tell you if you must know but its complicated...
monday i thought would be easy cuz all the teachers arent supposed to assign homework cuz of MCAS but i was wrong...i got a shitload which sucked. and i had forgotten my chem lab was due, so now thats late. SWEEET. there goes my grade. i also got back about 4 bad grades whih brought my grade down 5 points. which is even more awesome. got a homework assignment in CERAMICS which is ridiculous, lots of bookwork for history, and worksheet in algebra2, plus studying for a quiz. yeahhhh so good thing tenis was cancelled cuz i did homework for approximately 3 1/2 hours...probably more. between then my dad and i dropped off some food at bill millars, some vertran from a war that lives in town...andddd peter called me to reassure me that shit hit the fan with josh and that theyre done talking and being best friends. i cant blame peter but now shit is so messed up. i mean, now when i go up to NY peter and i cant hang out if im with josh because peter hates him...GREATT. this is just awesome. peter and i talked for an hour...and then my dad and i figured out some of the minor details about the roadtrip...and i called steve to ask him a few questions about the graudation yadayadayada. i talked to josh last night and i was upset with him but i just tried to hide it cuz theres nothing i can do now that he made this stupid decision...but i gotta deal with it and stick with him cuz thats what friends do...i just dont know anymore. i reallyyyyy dont. i gotta see where this goes...and i guess i care so much because deep down he still has a part of me which sounds gay but...idk all i know is that i hate it and sometimes i wish i never met the kid even though he made such an impact on my life. why does this always happen to me. i wish i could jsut be normal...
today, was mcas, then cait and i went to all 3 lunches and skipped C period but i had to go to D because i had a friggan QUIZ that took me and HOUR to finish...yeah shoulda been a test cuz it was like 4 sections. oh well...afterwards i had a match, and i played 1st doubs against st.bernards...and joelle and i won 6-3, 6-2 but half the time i thought i was playing well the other half i sucked there was no middle. uggggggh oh well. afterwards i had rehersal and we cleaned up the dance which was good...but i was exhausted. and nowwww im just hangin out cuz i dont have homework due tomorrow. yeahhh how relieveing is that...
okayy imm out, enough ranting<3
sunday i ended up going to the movies w/kiana & laura...which was funny cause theyre a riot. we saw alot like love whichhh was definately not up to my standards but i guess it was alrright. afterwards we waited for a ride for abbout an hour and just got food and hung out...then i came home andddd did more homework...yessss. talked to josh for an hour and a half and he knew that shit was gonna hit the fan soon...and i told him he could make a decision to fix eeverything but hes made up his mind. theres nothing i can do now and i feel so helpless but what can ya do. i know this kids making a huge mistake and im gonna be hearing about it for the next year or so. and hes gonna ask for comfort from me and even though i told him it would happen, i have this weakness for him that i just cant let him go and i know that ill give him the comfort he needs but GOD DAMNIT he frusterates me so much.
k, glad i got that out...that felt a little better haha, most of you dont know the story but w/e...ill tell you if you must know but its complicated...
monday i thought would be easy cuz all the teachers arent supposed to assign homework cuz of MCAS but i was wrong...i got a shitload which sucked. and i had forgotten my chem lab was due, so now thats late. SWEEET. there goes my grade. i also got back about 4 bad grades whih brought my grade down 5 points. which is even more awesome. got a homework assignment in CERAMICS which is ridiculous, lots of bookwork for history, and worksheet in algebra2, plus studying for a quiz. yeahhhh so good thing tenis was cancelled cuz i did homework for approximately 3 1/2 hours...probably more. between then my dad and i dropped off some food at bill millars, some vertran from a war that lives in town...andddd peter called me to reassure me that shit hit the fan with josh and that theyre done talking and being best friends. i cant blame peter but now shit is so messed up. i mean, now when i go up to NY peter and i cant hang out if im with josh because peter hates him...GREATT. this is just awesome. peter and i talked for an hour...and then my dad and i figured out some of the minor details about the roadtrip...and i called steve to ask him a few questions about the graudation yadayadayada. i talked to josh last night and i was upset with him but i just tried to hide it cuz theres nothing i can do now that he made this stupid decision...but i gotta deal with it and stick with him cuz thats what friends do...i just dont know anymore. i reallyyyyy dont. i gotta see where this goes...and i guess i care so much because deep down he still has a part of me which sounds gay but...idk all i know is that i hate it and sometimes i wish i never met the kid even though he made such an impact on my life. why does this always happen to me. i wish i could jsut be normal...
today, was mcas, then cait and i went to all 3 lunches and skipped C period but i had to go to D because i had a friggan QUIZ that took me and HOUR to finish...yeah shoulda been a test cuz it was like 4 sections. oh well...afterwards i had a match, and i played 1st doubs against st.bernards...and joelle and i won 6-3, 6-2 but half the time i thought i was playing well the other half i sucked there was no middle. uggggggh oh well. afterwards i had rehersal and we cleaned up the dance which was good...but i was exhausted. and nowwww im just hangin out cuz i dont have homework due tomorrow. yeahhh how relieveing is that...
okayy imm out, enough ranting<3