Shower Pirates [Xaldin/Xigbar, Zemyx, Saix/Xemnas]
Title: Shower Pirates
Pairing: Xaldin/Xigbar, hint of Zemyx, Saix/Xemnas mentioned
Type: humor, hint of fluff
Rating: PG-13 language/implied
Xigbar had a penchant for randomly appearing on the ceiling.
In Xaldin’s shower.
Naked.
Xaldin growled. “There’s barely enough room for one naked man in here, let alone two!”
Xigbar pouted, hands on his hips. “Saix and Xemnas seem to manage well enough…”
Xaldin gave the Freeshooter a deadpan look. “Yes, but those two can make do with any flat surface available. Or without one.”
“Maybe if you weren’t so fat…”
“What are you talking about?” Xaldin raised an eyebrow. “I don’t have any fat!”
“Heh, yeah…” Xigbar looked Xaldin up and down, a predatory grin on his face. “You’re aaaall muscle.”
Xaldin sighed inwardly. “If anyone’s fat here, it’s you.” He reached up and poked Xigbar’s tummy, which was a little squishy and currently right in front of his face.
“Hey, stop that!”
“Okay.” Xaldin stopped poking… and started squeezing.
“Hey!!”
Xaldin grinned. “Couldn’t you have come in a little higher, or a little lower? Your stomach is entirely unattractive.”
“Nope!” Xigbar crossed his arms and grinned. He, on the other hand, had a very good view.
Xaldin leaned forward and blew a loud raspberry on Xigbar’s stomach.
Xigbar tried to punch Xaldin in retaliation… and hurt his hand.
Xaldin smirked and grabbed Xigbar’s ass.
And Xigbar lost his concentration, fell off the ceiling, and knocked himself out on the tile floor.
Xaldin sighed and finished showering, ignoring the body beneath him. Afterwards, he dropped by Demyx’s room.
“Demyx. There’s something in the shower. Go clean it up.”
Demyx looked up from his desk, which was covered with messy sheets of staff paper. “Okay!” He leapt up and headed for the shower area. Shower pirates… I hope there are shower pirates! He was very excited about pirates lately, having been listening to Luxord talk about his home world. Shower pirates!
…Not this kind. He arrived at the shower, and was totally surprised to see Xigbar there, out cold on the floor. He crouched down and shook his superior’s shoulder. “…Are you okay?”
Xigbar shook his head, waking up… then brushed past Demyx and grabbed a towel, moving with short, fast motions.
Demyx looked up. “Uhm, you forgot your hairtie…” It had been lying in the drain.
Xigbar glared back at him. “Keep it,” he growled after a moment, and swept out the door. It just felt better to walk there - throwing the door open himself gave so much more emphasis.
Xaldin looked up at the familiar stomping. “Oh… you’re still alive?”
Xigbar glared at him, dripping wet, towel almost falling off his slim hips.
“God, you’re like a fucking cockroach.” Xaldin twirled a pen idly in his fingertips, waiting.
They glared at each other for another long minute… then suddenly, Xigbar cracked a grin. “Ha. You said cock.”
“How old are you again?”
“Old enough to - ”
“And why is that the first thing you think of?” Xaldin mused, feigning innocence.
Xigbar scowled at him. “It’s on the brain, okay?”
“I thought you said you weren’t gay.”
Xigbar slammed his hands down on Xaldin’s armrests, leaning in close. “Just shut up and kiss me already!”
“Someone’s demanding.”
“I give the orders around here…”
Xaldin kissed him, barely brushing their lips together, then sat back, smirking. “Happy?”
“NO.” Xigbar grinned, then, and slid forward onto Xaldin’s lap. He leaned in to take the kiss that he’d previously demanded, and Xaldin gave it willingly. The towel slid to the floor, and neither of them minded much.
{ + }
“What… is that?” Zexion pointed at his friend, looking up from the book in his lap.
“It’s Xigbar’s! Xaldin left him naked in the shower!” Demyx sat on the edge of Zexion’s desk, totally unaware that there was such a thing as ‘personal space’.
Zexion blinked. “What?”
“And he said I could keep the hairtie!” This was, obviously, the most important part of the story. Demyx had used the hairtie to make a tiny little poofy ponytail at the base of his skull, with the longer strands of hair at the back.
“Why would he…” The realization hit Zexion like a truck. “Oh dear god.”
Demyx was far too happy with his ponytail. “Do you like it?” He turned his head so Zexion could see better, unconsciously showing off his neck and shoulder.
Zexion gulped. “It’s very…” He blushed. “Cute.”
{ + }
Xaldin sighed. “You know… it’s getting kind of aggravating.”
Xigbar frowned, already half-asleep. “What?”
“You. Appearing in my shower.”
He yawned widely. Couldn’t they talk about this some other time? “But it’s fun.”
“But you end up hurting yourself.”
Oh, so that’s why he didn’t like it! Well, that explained a few things. Xigbar smirked. “Oh, come on. A little passing out never did anyone any harm.”
Xaldin glared.
“Okay, so I get a few bumps here and there, but wait a second, isn’t that your fault for breaking my concentration?”
“I’m just saying that if you didn’t show up in the first place - ”
“As if! If I didn’t love you in the first place - ”
“Braig - ”
Xigbar reached up and clamped a hand over Xaldin’s mouth. “Just shut up. If you have a better reason for me to stop interfering with your shower, feel free to let me know. Until then, keep your stupid sentimental notions to yourself, okay?” He sighed and let his head fall, this argument was over and he was tired.
Xaldin let him sleep… and snorted. Ha. You shouldn’t be the one accusing me of sentimental notions, he thought darkly. He hadn’t heard that since… before all of this. When he was just Dilan, head over heels for his fellow apprentice.
Had anything really changed?
Pairing: Xaldin/Xigbar, hint of Zemyx, Saix/Xemnas mentioned
Type: humor, hint of fluff
Rating: PG-13 language/implied
Xigbar had a penchant for randomly appearing on the ceiling.
In Xaldin’s shower.
Naked.
Xaldin growled. “There’s barely enough room for one naked man in here, let alone two!”
Xigbar pouted, hands on his hips. “Saix and Xemnas seem to manage well enough…”
Xaldin gave the Freeshooter a deadpan look. “Yes, but those two can make do with any flat surface available. Or without one.”
“Maybe if you weren’t so fat…”
“What are you talking about?” Xaldin raised an eyebrow. “I don’t have any fat!”
“Heh, yeah…” Xigbar looked Xaldin up and down, a predatory grin on his face. “You’re aaaall muscle.”
Xaldin sighed inwardly. “If anyone’s fat here, it’s you.” He reached up and poked Xigbar’s tummy, which was a little squishy and currently right in front of his face.
“Hey, stop that!”
“Okay.” Xaldin stopped poking… and started squeezing.
“Hey!!”
Xaldin grinned. “Couldn’t you have come in a little higher, or a little lower? Your stomach is entirely unattractive.”
“Nope!” Xigbar crossed his arms and grinned. He, on the other hand, had a very good view.
Xaldin leaned forward and blew a loud raspberry on Xigbar’s stomach.
Xigbar tried to punch Xaldin in retaliation… and hurt his hand.
Xaldin smirked and grabbed Xigbar’s ass.
And Xigbar lost his concentration, fell off the ceiling, and knocked himself out on the tile floor.
Xaldin sighed and finished showering, ignoring the body beneath him. Afterwards, he dropped by Demyx’s room.
“Demyx. There’s something in the shower. Go clean it up.”
Demyx looked up from his desk, which was covered with messy sheets of staff paper. “Okay!” He leapt up and headed for the shower area. Shower pirates… I hope there are shower pirates! He was very excited about pirates lately, having been listening to Luxord talk about his home world. Shower pirates!
…Not this kind. He arrived at the shower, and was totally surprised to see Xigbar there, out cold on the floor. He crouched down and shook his superior’s shoulder. “…Are you okay?”
Xigbar shook his head, waking up… then brushed past Demyx and grabbed a towel, moving with short, fast motions.
Demyx looked up. “Uhm, you forgot your hairtie…” It had been lying in the drain.
Xigbar glared back at him. “Keep it,” he growled after a moment, and swept out the door. It just felt better to walk there - throwing the door open himself gave so much more emphasis.
Xaldin looked up at the familiar stomping. “Oh… you’re still alive?”
Xigbar glared at him, dripping wet, towel almost falling off his slim hips.
“God, you’re like a fucking cockroach.” Xaldin twirled a pen idly in his fingertips, waiting.
They glared at each other for another long minute… then suddenly, Xigbar cracked a grin. “Ha. You said cock.”
“How old are you again?”
“Old enough to - ”
“And why is that the first thing you think of?” Xaldin mused, feigning innocence.
Xigbar scowled at him. “It’s on the brain, okay?”
“I thought you said you weren’t gay.”
Xigbar slammed his hands down on Xaldin’s armrests, leaning in close. “Just shut up and kiss me already!”
“Someone’s demanding.”
“I give the orders around here…”
Xaldin kissed him, barely brushing their lips together, then sat back, smirking. “Happy?”
“NO.” Xigbar grinned, then, and slid forward onto Xaldin’s lap. He leaned in to take the kiss that he’d previously demanded, and Xaldin gave it willingly. The towel slid to the floor, and neither of them minded much.
{ + }
“What… is that?” Zexion pointed at his friend, looking up from the book in his lap.
“It’s Xigbar’s! Xaldin left him naked in the shower!” Demyx sat on the edge of Zexion’s desk, totally unaware that there was such a thing as ‘personal space’.
Zexion blinked. “What?”
“And he said I could keep the hairtie!” This was, obviously, the most important part of the story. Demyx had used the hairtie to make a tiny little poofy ponytail at the base of his skull, with the longer strands of hair at the back.
“Why would he…” The realization hit Zexion like a truck. “Oh dear god.”
Demyx was far too happy with his ponytail. “Do you like it?” He turned his head so Zexion could see better, unconsciously showing off his neck and shoulder.
Zexion gulped. “It’s very…” He blushed. “Cute.”
{ + }
Xaldin sighed. “You know… it’s getting kind of aggravating.”
Xigbar frowned, already half-asleep. “What?”
“You. Appearing in my shower.”
He yawned widely. Couldn’t they talk about this some other time? “But it’s fun.”
“But you end up hurting yourself.”
Oh, so that’s why he didn’t like it! Well, that explained a few things. Xigbar smirked. “Oh, come on. A little passing out never did anyone any harm.”
Xaldin glared.
“Okay, so I get a few bumps here and there, but wait a second, isn’t that your fault for breaking my concentration?”
“I’m just saying that if you didn’t show up in the first place - ”
“As if! If I didn’t love you in the first place - ”
“Braig - ”
Xigbar reached up and clamped a hand over Xaldin’s mouth. “Just shut up. If you have a better reason for me to stop interfering with your shower, feel free to let me know. Until then, keep your stupid sentimental notions to yourself, okay?” He sighed and let his head fall, this argument was over and he was tired.
Xaldin let him sleep… and snorted. Ha. You shouldn’t be the one accusing me of sentimental notions, he thought darkly. He hadn’t heard that since… before all of this. When he was just Dilan, head over heels for his fellow apprentice.
Had anything really changed?