What's Next?
So, Heath Ledger died yesterday. I was shocked at first but I didn't get upset over him being dead, I was upset over the media frenzy that went on. I'm so sick and tired of people's personal lives and problems being aired on tv and being put into print for the whole world to see. And for what? Our entertainment? It's sick. Anna Nicole, Britney, and now watching Heath's body being wheeled into the ambulence, when does it stop? They're just people dealing with real life situations that people go through every single day. People get divorced, go through custody battles, and even die. It happens every day. That may make me sound heartless but that's how I felt yesterday.
Today though, I woke up and realized that he was actually dead. I loved so many of his movies, and he was so charming. I couldn't stop thinking about how young his daughter is and how she'll only get to know him by what she see's on film. That's terrible. I hate it when people die, who doesn't, but I always take it so personally even if I don't know the person. I become so numb to the world that I can barely function. This is so awful, I feel terrible for his daughter, and family.
One of my best friends at school told me last night that she will probably be leaving the shcool. She failed a class last semester and she's now inelligable for the swim team and our coach isn't allowed to give her money for her scholarship so there's no point in her being here if she's not going to swim. She's going back to Seattle and I'm left here. She was my swimming partner, my other sarcastic half, my Thai food buddy and Chris Crocker fan. This girl knew so much about me and I opened up to her and vice versa when no one else was breaking through my barriers. I couldn't help buy cry when she told me, and when she tells the team today I know I am going to be bawling like a baby. I am not going to swim tonight, i am going to burry myself in homework and pass the time away.
Nothing like people dying and leaving. I know there's a reason for everything, I truly believe that, but sometimes it's so hard to see past what's going on right in front of you.
What's going to happen next? Is it downhill or uphill from here? I really want to know so I can be somewhat prepared for whatever is thrown at me next.