Inviz Blend Interlude
Title: Joel’s Epic Senior Year
Author: Um. Me. x-tired-crazy-x
Summary: AU (not related. SRY) Joel crushes on Benji… in epic proportions. The story takes place during their senior year of high school. I know… I’m so creative. Anyways, the whole world is… Wait, no, better than that, the entire universe is working against him. Can they even manage to get together or will evil scheming bitches keep them apart? Who knows? You gotta read it. It’s like a mystery.
Disclaimer: Not real. Never happened. Kind of impossible.
Last Minute Notes: This story is mildly complete. Right now, its over 50 pages. And I’m on the last part. I just felt like getting it up. (Posting it that is.)
Joel Has This Crush...:: Best Birthday Present Ever... Duh:: Fucking Bitch is What the Girl Is:: You Don't Even Know Me
School isn’t so bad during the following week. Benji doesn’t show up until Thursday, but Kris eases my worrying by keeping me up to date with what’s going on. It kills me to hear about his depression and his sister’s helplessness to get through to him, but I can’t help but feel betrayed by him. And even if I did want to go talk to him, I really wouldn’t have time considering someone came forth about the incident and turned Samara in. Unfortunately, she was simply suspended for ten days because she wasn’t ‘directly’ involved and while the ‘person that came forth’ had shown proof of her involvement, it wasn’t enough. She fought the charge, her parents threatened a lawsuit and she gets her way…
I know it was Benji that turned her in. It kind of makes it bittersweet, but at the same time, I’m happy that all the students responsible have finally paid for all the pain and suffering I was forced to endure.
I didn’t have the guts to turn them in myself. Even though I knew who a couple of them were, I never had the guts to stand up for myself. I guess it’s kind of sad, but at the same time, I know if that were to happen now… well, it probably would never happen now, but if it did I wouldn’t stay silent. I would turn them in right away. I guess I finally learned the meaning of self-respect.
The entire school population knows what happened to me two years ago and act like they haven’t had a secret document pledging their allegiance against me. No, girls are perky when they wave at me and say hello and if a guy has an issue with my sexual orientation, he just doesn’t talk to me, which is such amazing change. I don’t think I could possibly ask for anymore. It’s like this for a while, Benji slowly slipping off the radar while I finally take a place in the student body. A place all my own.
And then Benji disappears again and rumors start flying around that he’s been sent off to some mental health facility. I want to ask Kris, because even though Kris thinks that what Benji did to me was fucked up, he says and I quote, “I’ve known this kid since the first day of pre-school. Friendship like that, you just don’t throw away…”
I can accept that. I don’t have a problem with Kris still talking to Benji, but it just makes me feel guilty when I use Kris to ask about my ex. Besides that, Kris is pretty much my best friend.
Anyways, when Benji disappears, word catches my ear that Sarah is ‘talking shit’ on me or something, but I don’t buy it. In fact, instead, I go up to her one day after school and offer her a ride home. She smiles at me politely and nods.
Upon entering my vehicle, in the front seat for a change, she sits up straight as if trying to act older than she really is… I wonder if this is just a show for me so I’ll think she’s matured, or if it’s an actually character trait spawned by the events recently taking place in her life. That’ll always be a mystery to me, but by what she says next, my vote sways more towards her being a naturally genuine person. No gimmicks, just Sarah.
“I don’t hate you or anything. I don’t blame you either,” she says quickly like the words have been on the tip of her tongue, dying to get out. I smile sadly, looking in my rear view mirror before lazily checking my blind spots and pulling out of my parking spot.
“I didn’t think you did,” I reply truthfully and she nods.
“I figured, but just in case…” she trails off with a shrug.
I pull out of the school parking lot and somehow manage to get in front of all the school buses. We’re both silent… I know what I want to ask, but I don’t exactly know how to go about asking it. Thankfully, she offers.
“You wanna know where he is?”
I look over to her, only pulling my eyes from the road for a second while I bite my lip and nod. “Yeah, I think I do,” I say, truthfully unsure.
“I think you do too,” she agrees making me laugh. She reminds me of him… I want to tell her that, but I don’t.
“He asked to move in with his Uncle in Connecticut. Guess they have better drugs up there,” she shrugs lamely.
“What?” I question as if I heard her wrong, because I must have.
“His dad’s brother offered to take him in. Don’t ask me how Benji found him, but he did…” Sarah begins to explain.
“No, about the drugs,” I clarify and she falls silent, kind of sad.
“Oh, it’s nothing really,” she answers. I raise a brow at her, which she catches.
“We got into a fight before he left, I told him he smokes to much weed and we got into a screaming match. Didn’t get to apologize before he left,” she says and I can hear the tears in her voice so I don’t press on any longer.
In fact, I don’t really have to seeing as I pull up in front of her friend’s house.
“I’m sorry,” I offer, grim.
“Don’t be, Joel. It’s his fault, his life,” she tells me looking into my eyes with sincerity.
“Yeah but-”
“No buts, Joel. It’s his life to fuck up, just like you’ve got your life, and I’ve got my life,” she takes a moment to breathe while she opens the car door to get out. “The thing is most teenagers think they don’t have control over anything without realizing that they control everything… I’m not saying that it’s all his fault, there’s a lot of things that contributed to his choices, but in the end, they’re his choices to make, y’know?”
As I look up at Sarah, the sun shining sideways on her face, I stare in amazement at the sounds of wisdom way beyond her short 15 years.
“You’re a smart girl, Sarah,” I tell her. She smiles brightly which is nice to see in contrast to the almost-tears.
“Heh… And you’re still in love with my brother,” she says. “Or at least who he was,” she adds before slamming the passenger door shut and running to her friends house.
I tilt my head at the thought, denying that statement through and through.
Benji comes back. He’s quiet kind of how I used to be, except nobody bothers him. He keeps to himself barely speaking to even Kris. Kris confesses his frustrations to me, all while he begs me to go speak to him, thinking that I’ll be able to work some kind of magic. Everyone seems to think that…
I tell him I have nothing to say to Benji… even if that is certainly the lie of the century, we’ll let that go.
“It’s not like Benji’s made a move to talk to me,” I point out.
“Yeah, probably because he knows you won’t listen to him,” Kris argues.
“I’d listen to him,” I reply quickly. I would too, if he made the effort.
“Well you try to convince his head of that.” And with that Kris walks away annoyed to hell only to apologize a couple of hours later after he talks with the guru that Sarah has become.
Sarah really has grown up a lot over this year, but then again so have I. I think there’s no exact age where someone becomes an adult, it’s more of a time in your life kind of thing that when it happens, it just happens. Then, before you know it you’re thinking differently and your outlook on life has totally changed. It’s actually a quite miraculous moment in a person’s life when they look back on the things they’ve done and laugh at their passed actions, but not in a self-deprecating kind of way, in the kind of way where you’re simply just thinking about all the stupid shit you used to do and all the foolish fun you had doing it. Like our parents really don’t know that we’re running off to get high and the teachers honestly believe that we carry lighters around to light candles in our bedrooms.
I still watch Benji. I sometimes don’t even realize that I’m doing it. I’ll be outside during lunch or maybe in the cafeteria and he’ll just walk by and my eyes automatically go to him. His form, slumped and depressed, skinnier than he used to be… I think it’s because I’ve always watched him. He’s pretty much been the crush of my life and you can’t just flip a switch and turn that off.
It’s all out of habit though. A really bad habit…
People talk about him way more than they ever talked about me. Benji must be the number one topic of interest these days, and if he isn’t yet, he’s well on the way. Every day you’ll hear a conversation along the lines of, “I saw him yesterday walking down the street, it was raining and he didn’t even have a hood on,” like its some big scandalous secret. Like a walk in the rain isn’t one of the most comforting things when you’re down-in-the-dumps. Of course, it’s not like they’ve ever experienced the feeling of walking around and living like you’re already dead, and they may never in the lives understand…
Whatever, they’re not even worth a rant, they don’t really matter.
Okay, so yeah. Benji’s back. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t relieved.
TBC...
Okeeday. This is pretty much just a filler to let you guys know what's gone down. If anybody would like some more insight on any of the events mentioned, feel free to leave a comment here or message me on AIM with a scene you'd like to read more of. I'm in a generous mood and up for taking requests =D
On the other hand, the next big chapter will be the last one. Joel's Epic Senior Year is already coming to an end... It's just a matter of getting the rest of the story out of my head. With this story I took a different approach then I do with most of my stories and actually planned ahead... Yeah, if you know me then I know you must be shocked to hear that.
Thanks for reading as always and I hope you take a second to review.
Oh, and my screen name is x3thedeadsaints (AIM) or email me at BrokenLovesucks@yahoo.com with your ideas of what you'd like to read more of.
♥Jess
Author: Um. Me. x-tired-crazy-x
Summary: AU (not related. SRY) Joel crushes on Benji… in epic proportions. The story takes place during their senior year of high school. I know… I’m so creative. Anyways, the whole world is… Wait, no, better than that, the entire universe is working against him. Can they even manage to get together or will evil scheming bitches keep them apart? Who knows? You gotta read it. It’s like a mystery.
Disclaimer: Not real. Never happened. Kind of impossible.
Last Minute Notes: This story is mildly complete. Right now, its over 50 pages. And I’m on the last part. I just felt like getting it up. (Posting it that is.)
Joel Has This Crush...:: Best Birthday Present Ever... Duh:: Fucking Bitch is What the Girl Is:: You Don't Even Know Me
School isn’t so bad during the following week. Benji doesn’t show up until Thursday, but Kris eases my worrying by keeping me up to date with what’s going on. It kills me to hear about his depression and his sister’s helplessness to get through to him, but I can’t help but feel betrayed by him. And even if I did want to go talk to him, I really wouldn’t have time considering someone came forth about the incident and turned Samara in. Unfortunately, she was simply suspended for ten days because she wasn’t ‘directly’ involved and while the ‘person that came forth’ had shown proof of her involvement, it wasn’t enough. She fought the charge, her parents threatened a lawsuit and she gets her way…
I know it was Benji that turned her in. It kind of makes it bittersweet, but at the same time, I’m happy that all the students responsible have finally paid for all the pain and suffering I was forced to endure.
I didn’t have the guts to turn them in myself. Even though I knew who a couple of them were, I never had the guts to stand up for myself. I guess it’s kind of sad, but at the same time, I know if that were to happen now… well, it probably would never happen now, but if it did I wouldn’t stay silent. I would turn them in right away. I guess I finally learned the meaning of self-respect.
The entire school population knows what happened to me two years ago and act like they haven’t had a secret document pledging their allegiance against me. No, girls are perky when they wave at me and say hello and if a guy has an issue with my sexual orientation, he just doesn’t talk to me, which is such amazing change. I don’t think I could possibly ask for anymore. It’s like this for a while, Benji slowly slipping off the radar while I finally take a place in the student body. A place all my own.
And then Benji disappears again and rumors start flying around that he’s been sent off to some mental health facility. I want to ask Kris, because even though Kris thinks that what Benji did to me was fucked up, he says and I quote, “I’ve known this kid since the first day of pre-school. Friendship like that, you just don’t throw away…”
I can accept that. I don’t have a problem with Kris still talking to Benji, but it just makes me feel guilty when I use Kris to ask about my ex. Besides that, Kris is pretty much my best friend.
Anyways, when Benji disappears, word catches my ear that Sarah is ‘talking shit’ on me or something, but I don’t buy it. In fact, instead, I go up to her one day after school and offer her a ride home. She smiles at me politely and nods.
Upon entering my vehicle, in the front seat for a change, she sits up straight as if trying to act older than she really is… I wonder if this is just a show for me so I’ll think she’s matured, or if it’s an actually character trait spawned by the events recently taking place in her life. That’ll always be a mystery to me, but by what she says next, my vote sways more towards her being a naturally genuine person. No gimmicks, just Sarah.
“I don’t hate you or anything. I don’t blame you either,” she says quickly like the words have been on the tip of her tongue, dying to get out. I smile sadly, looking in my rear view mirror before lazily checking my blind spots and pulling out of my parking spot.
“I didn’t think you did,” I reply truthfully and she nods.
“I figured, but just in case…” she trails off with a shrug.
I pull out of the school parking lot and somehow manage to get in front of all the school buses. We’re both silent… I know what I want to ask, but I don’t exactly know how to go about asking it. Thankfully, she offers.
“You wanna know where he is?”
I look over to her, only pulling my eyes from the road for a second while I bite my lip and nod. “Yeah, I think I do,” I say, truthfully unsure.
“I think you do too,” she agrees making me laugh. She reminds me of him… I want to tell her that, but I don’t.
“He asked to move in with his Uncle in Connecticut. Guess they have better drugs up there,” she shrugs lamely.
“What?” I question as if I heard her wrong, because I must have.
“His dad’s brother offered to take him in. Don’t ask me how Benji found him, but he did…” Sarah begins to explain.
“No, about the drugs,” I clarify and she falls silent, kind of sad.
“Oh, it’s nothing really,” she answers. I raise a brow at her, which she catches.
“We got into a fight before he left, I told him he smokes to much weed and we got into a screaming match. Didn’t get to apologize before he left,” she says and I can hear the tears in her voice so I don’t press on any longer.
In fact, I don’t really have to seeing as I pull up in front of her friend’s house.
“I’m sorry,” I offer, grim.
“Don’t be, Joel. It’s his fault, his life,” she tells me looking into my eyes with sincerity.
“Yeah but-”
“No buts, Joel. It’s his life to fuck up, just like you’ve got your life, and I’ve got my life,” she takes a moment to breathe while she opens the car door to get out. “The thing is most teenagers think they don’t have control over anything without realizing that they control everything… I’m not saying that it’s all his fault, there’s a lot of things that contributed to his choices, but in the end, they’re his choices to make, y’know?”
As I look up at Sarah, the sun shining sideways on her face, I stare in amazement at the sounds of wisdom way beyond her short 15 years.
“You’re a smart girl, Sarah,” I tell her. She smiles brightly which is nice to see in contrast to the almost-tears.
“Heh… And you’re still in love with my brother,” she says. “Or at least who he was,” she adds before slamming the passenger door shut and running to her friends house.
I tilt my head at the thought, denying that statement through and through.
Benji comes back. He’s quiet kind of how I used to be, except nobody bothers him. He keeps to himself barely speaking to even Kris. Kris confesses his frustrations to me, all while he begs me to go speak to him, thinking that I’ll be able to work some kind of magic. Everyone seems to think that…
I tell him I have nothing to say to Benji… even if that is certainly the lie of the century, we’ll let that go.
“It’s not like Benji’s made a move to talk to me,” I point out.
“Yeah, probably because he knows you won’t listen to him,” Kris argues.
“I’d listen to him,” I reply quickly. I would too, if he made the effort.
“Well you try to convince his head of that.” And with that Kris walks away annoyed to hell only to apologize a couple of hours later after he talks with the guru that Sarah has become.
Sarah really has grown up a lot over this year, but then again so have I. I think there’s no exact age where someone becomes an adult, it’s more of a time in your life kind of thing that when it happens, it just happens. Then, before you know it you’re thinking differently and your outlook on life has totally changed. It’s actually a quite miraculous moment in a person’s life when they look back on the things they’ve done and laugh at their passed actions, but not in a self-deprecating kind of way, in the kind of way where you’re simply just thinking about all the stupid shit you used to do and all the foolish fun you had doing it. Like our parents really don’t know that we’re running off to get high and the teachers honestly believe that we carry lighters around to light candles in our bedrooms.
I still watch Benji. I sometimes don’t even realize that I’m doing it. I’ll be outside during lunch or maybe in the cafeteria and he’ll just walk by and my eyes automatically go to him. His form, slumped and depressed, skinnier than he used to be… I think it’s because I’ve always watched him. He’s pretty much been the crush of my life and you can’t just flip a switch and turn that off.
It’s all out of habit though. A really bad habit…
People talk about him way more than they ever talked about me. Benji must be the number one topic of interest these days, and if he isn’t yet, he’s well on the way. Every day you’ll hear a conversation along the lines of, “I saw him yesterday walking down the street, it was raining and he didn’t even have a hood on,” like its some big scandalous secret. Like a walk in the rain isn’t one of the most comforting things when you’re down-in-the-dumps. Of course, it’s not like they’ve ever experienced the feeling of walking around and living like you’re already dead, and they may never in the lives understand…
Whatever, they’re not even worth a rant, they don’t really matter.
Okay, so yeah. Benji’s back. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t relieved.
TBC...
Okeeday. This is pretty much just a filler to let you guys know what's gone down. If anybody would like some more insight on any of the events mentioned, feel free to leave a comment here or message me on AIM with a scene you'd like to read more of. I'm in a generous mood and up for taking requests =D
On the other hand, the next big chapter will be the last one. Joel's Epic Senior Year is already coming to an end... It's just a matter of getting the rest of the story out of my head. With this story I took a different approach then I do with most of my stories and actually planned ahead... Yeah, if you know me then I know you must be shocked to hear that.
Thanks for reading as always and I hope you take a second to review.
Oh, and my screen name is x3thedeadsaints (AIM) or email me at BrokenLovesucks@yahoo.com with your ideas of what you'd like to read more of.
♥Jess