EPISODE IN REVIEW: FAMILY

May 08, 2007 19:06

OKayz. So this is liek sooper late. I knowz. But I shall be posting an extra gift shortly to make up for this bein' late. And then I shall be posting tonight's episode in review on time for once. OMG. Awesomeness.

So without further ado, here we are with the fakkin' EPISODE IN REVIEW OF LATENESS!

Eye!Makeup-Mama: Now don't be too scared now. Hez awl freaky lookin'.
Baseball!Kid: I iz nawt scaired!
Disinfection-chamber: WHOOOOOOOSHHHH! Gawd, I lovez doin' that. Hey, how'd yer eye-makeup stay on through that?
Eye!Makeup-Mama: Shh. Don't ask questions.

Leukemia!Kid: Yo.
Baseball!Kid: O_O
Leukemia!Kid: I lookz like a alien-man. :(
Baseball!Kid: Hey. Yoo do. Iz funny :D
Leukemia!Kid: *tear*

Baseball!Kid: *SNEEZE*
Wilson: O_o Oh hellz no.

Hector: I LOVEZ YOO!
House: GET OFFA MAH BED!
Hector: YOOZ ALL WARM AND CUDDLY!
House: wut teh FAKK is wrong wiff you!? YOU EATED MAH FAVORITE GAY-MAN SHOOOOOOEZ! I know I have liek, fifty billion pairz, but still... *glarez*
Hector: ......woof. :D

Foreman: Deer Jeebus, why am I teh angst?
Jeebus: I don't know. Srsly.
Foreman: You think if I try summuh that Bible stuff you'd make mah life less angsty?
Jeebus: I dunno.
House: STOP TALKIN' TO YER 'MAGINARY FRIEND! We gotsa case.
Jeebus: Hey, now. That's nawt nice.
Foreman: *tear*

House: How old iz Hector?
Wilson: Liek, 17.
House: Holy crap! That's liek a bazilionty-twelve in dawg yearz. Howz he awl alive?
Wilson: Well, as Soopur!Gay-man, I needed a side-kick, and soz I knocked him in a puddle of radioactive goo that makes him awl soopur and stuff, and soz he livez longer than the average dawg.
House: .....
Wilson: ..... :D
House: Srsly. Yoo need a hobby 'er sumfin. Talkin' to no one but me and teh cancer kids is makin' you all loopy.

House: Soz, parent-type-ppl, yoo should do wut I say!
Wilson: But yoo need ta make yer own decision.
House: So nowz I intimidate you! GRARRR!
Wilson: And I look at you in a sympathetic manner. *bambi eyez*
House: Wow, we're rly good at this whole good-cop, bad-cop thing. It's kinda awesome.
Wilson: Yes, plz. ;D

Indecisive!Parents: Should we do eet?
House: Yes.
Wilson: Do whutya want.
House: As long as that's what I say to do.
Wilson: Shh.

Foreman: Soz, I can't 'member the color of her shirt 'n stuff, so I'm teh angst.
Chase: Yeah, you really are. That's lame. Here, letz play baseball. *THROWZ*
Foreman: Soz, do you think I'm liek a bad person?
Chase: I think that you need help if alluva sudden yer comin' to ME fer advice and squishy-feel-good-talkz.
Foreman: That's probably troo. I think i'm awl turnin' inta House. *THROWZ AND MISSES BADLY*
Chase: Wow. You missed. It's awl ominous 'n stuff.
Foreman: Wutz up with all the symbolism they keep tryin' to put inta the show?
Chase: I dunno. It's creepy.

Foreman: Hez gots acute scrotum.
House: AAAWWWZ! A CUTE SCROTUM! Let's, liek, dress eet up and have a tea party! :D
Foreman: ACUTE. Not a cute. Srsly, wut teh fakk is wrong wiff you?

Chase: IZ TUESDAY! Guess wut? I LOVEz YOU!
Cameron: *horrified stare*
Chase: .....okay, well, take yer time decidin' if'n you want to have passionate sex, 2.5 kidz and a house wiff a white picket fence. I'll wait.
Cameron: *even more horrified stare*
Chase: Teehee.

Cameron: ZOMG. Hiz heart iz awl screwy.
House: Musta been takin' lessons from Angsty-man, here. Iz it all broked-ed and black like his soooooouuuul?
Foreman: *tear* Shaddup, yoo asshole.
House: .....  :D

House: I know wut we do wiff teh bone marrow! We'll simmer 'n serve eet!
Wilson: COOKIN! YAYZ! I go getz out mah pots, pans 'n "Kiss-Teh-Cooker-Man" apron!
House: Wtf.

Foreman: If'n we do eet, he diez!
Wilson: Well, I think we oughta, cuz mah hair looks fabulous!
Foreman: Noz, we srsly shouldn't.
Wilson: Noz, rly, we should. Look how it bounces and shines! *hair-flip*(
Cuddy: Wow, I got shafted this episode, what with two scenes 'n all. Wut do YOU think, House?
House: Wilson's hair iz teh sex and he'z right, Foreman haz no hair 'n hez wrong, and yer bewbies are showin',

Cuddy: Srsly, wut iz wiff Foreman bein' awl emo?
House: I dunno. I think I fire heem.
Cuddy: *gasperz*
House: You really did get shafted this episode.
Cuddy: I knowz...

Drama!Daddy: We has ta CRIPPLE heem?
House: He won't play BASEBALL. That don't make you a CRIPPLE. I KNOWZ WUT MAKEZ YOU A CRIPPLE! *tear* Omg. Wilson, hold me.
Wilson: *pats*

Indecisive!Parents: Wut should we DOOOOO?
House: Do eet.
Wilson: ..... do eet.
Indecisive!Parents: Okayz.
House: Wowz, yer awl good at that manipulatin'. It's teh awesome.
Wilson: I knowz. It's how I got ya ta sleep wiff me that first time.
House: Whaddidyoo say?
Wilson:....... nuthin'..... :D

Drama!Daddy: We shoulda told heem!
Eye!Makeup-Mama: No we SHOULDN'T.
Drama!Daddy: Omg. Yes we SHOULD'VE.
Eye!Makeup-Mama: NU-UH!
Cameron: SHADDUP! Jeezus. You guyz iz really bad at makin' decisions. Srsly.

House: *pickz up fone* Hellooooo?
Wilson: Hey thar. Wutz happenin?
House: Well, nuthin' mu--... ZOMG! HECTOR KILLED HISSELF!!!
Wilson: WUT?
House: NOOOOOZ! WHY WOULD HE DO EET?! HE HAD SO MUCH TO LIVE FOOOOOR! *tear*
Hector: Whoooooaaaa.... trippy. This is good shit, man. I see why you iz poppin' it like teh M&Mz.
House: ....dammit. Nevermind. He's all high 'n stuff....
Hector: Heehehehehe!
House: I hait yoo.

House: Wanna catch a movie?
Wilson: At one in the morning?
House: I knowz this place. *leer* I wouldn't wear those shoes, though it won't rly matter since yer gonna be on yer knees most of the time anywayz....
Wilson: *shudder* I'll go get the car.

Cane: *iz ded*
House: DAMMIT! *glarez*
Wilson: Don't look at me! I didn't do eet this time!
House: I knowz. It'z yer stoopid-hed dog. I hait heem!
Wilson: *on radio* Soopur-gay-dawg! Yer mission iz accomplished! :D
Hector: *on radio* I even peed on hiz Beetles records too!
Wilson: *on radio* GOOD JOB! Extra-gay points!
House: Wtf. I can still hear you.
Wilson: WE'VE BEEN DISCOVERED! CODe rED! *sashays away*
House: I think we've taken this joke too far.
Hector: Nu-uh. It'z just gettin' started. :D
House: oh hell.

Foreman: Soz, we found a differnt way ta do eet wiff a new donor that's prob'ly awl stoopid.
Indecisive!Parents: KAYZ!
House: OMg. You totally just undercut me. Oh hellz no, bitch.

Wilson: Foreman iz-a IDIOT! LOOK AT MAH SEXY RIGHTEOUS ANGER!
House: Noz. Foreman's a moron, but yer a COWARD.
WIlson: ...... :O
House: Yoo look good speechless wiff yer mouth awl open. Hold me back, now.

House: O NOZ! I left teh door open an' mah dog got all killed by a train er a car er a ANVIL.
Bugz-Bunny: Hey, bitch, stop stealin' mah thunder.

House: *slams door*
Hector: OWCHIE! That hurt!
House: Good, yoo dum-face. :D
Hector: Oh, yoo iz goin' down. Soopur-gay-dawg powerz AWAY! *projectile pee on teh leather couch*
House: Srsly. We are sooooo done with this joke. Now. Plz.
Wilson: Yoo knowz yoo love eet.  :-*
House: Shaddup.

House: I iz sry.
Wilson: Kayz.
House: Yer pathetic. I didn't mean that.
Wilson: Yes yoo did.
House: No I didn't.
Wilson: Yes yoo did, er no sex fer yoo.
House: ..... Yes I did.
WIlson: See? Yer pathetic.

Cool!Shop-dude: Here. Iz made-a bull penis.
House: Penis!cane. Kinky.
Wilson: Eewz.

Cameron: zomg. That cane iz flaming!
Chase: Well... so iz House.
House: It makez me look awl fast too. Vrooooooom!
Foreman: wtf...

Drama!Daddy: Hez a fighter! We're nawt givin' up on heem! NAWT!
House: *tosses roses* That wuz a beautifully over-acted performance! *tear*
Drama!Daddy: Thanks.

Wilson: House is gonna fire yoo.
Foreman: Well, we still gotsta figure this out. Now the water-pump wuzn't the problem...
Wilson: Water-pump? Wtf.

Foreman: Do yoo luv yer brother?
Baseball!Kid: Um.... yeah...?
Foreman: *STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB!*
Baseball!Kid: GRAAaaAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!
baka_sesei: O_____O Holy shit. That's just uncalled for.

Wilson: Yoo killed Hector yet?
House: Noperz.
Wilson: Iz impossible to kill soopur-gay-dawg! :D
House: But iz NAWT impossible to turn him to dark side! Now he'z soopur-LIMPY-dawg!
Hector: *chewin' on Wilson's stethoscope* The benefits are better.
Wilson: *tear*

Wilson: Wife Numbah 2 wants heem back.
House: .... okayz.
Hector: *bambi eyez*
House: I will always remember yoo.... *tear* Now go walk away in dramatic slow motion with appropriate background music!
WIlson: wtf.

Foreman: I CAN'T STAND TEH ANGST ANYMORE!
House: Yer lame. Srsly. wtf.
Foreman: I don't want ta be liek you. I quit.
House: Wtf. I'm AWESOME. Who DOESN'T want to be like me!? Even the DAWG wanted to be liek me!
Foreman: *tear*

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