fic- "Time Heals" (NC-17, Complete, SGA, Ties that Bind) Part 7
Time Heals by CJ aka WritinginCT (NC-17)
Fandom: Stargate SGA
Pairing: multiple m/m (primarily OC's), m/f, m/m/f
Warnings: rape/ torture recovery (non graphic descriptions of the assault itself)
Categories: Drama, romance, friendship, family, BDsM.
Disclaimer: I don't own the recognizable characters I'm just inspired by them.
Status: Complete 6/08/2011 53200 words
Summary: Time may have healed their bodies, but for two damaged men assigned to Atlantis, it will take meeting each other to truly become whole again.
Note: Set, with permission, in the alternate SGA universe The Ties That Bind created by keiramarcos , which was inspired by xanthelj 's works Coming Home and General & Dr. Sheppard.
Thanks to singletailwhip for the grammar beta! She's a master comma wrangler and error catcher!
Special thanks to Keira for letting me play in her sandbox and her support and beta. I adore the TTB series and I'm so excited to have permission to be a part of it- thank you, Keira!
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Joey nodded and stepped aside so Carmine could enter. Carmine was trying to figure out where to sit or stand to best put Joey at ease, especially given his nudity and current aroused state. He finally decided on the couch and sat down as casually as he could.
Joey's face was still flushed and he was looking at the now closed door. Carmine asked conversationally, "So I'm thinking that exhibitionism is one of your kinks."
Joey went and sat on the end of the bed facing Carmine. He answered honestly, "It used to be."
"So tell me about your dynamic, then and now," Carmine prompted.
Joey relaxed a bit and replied, "I used to really like exhibiting. Having sex in public or even just being stroked and caressed used to be an amazing turn on for me. I don't really have heavy pain kinks, but I like things like floggers and cats when they're used to tease and not cause pain. I used to enjoy... I used to like complete bondage, you know, hoods, gags, that whole thing, but I don't think I could handle that any more. You should know that I never really had any formal training, being a foster kid, and Steven..." He paused looking for Carmine's reaction.
"I don't want to know every intimate detail of your relationship with Caldwell, Joey, but you don't ever have to hesitate to mention him, I know how important he is to you, and how big a part he played in your past," Carmine replied evenly.
"Yes, sir," Joey said with a grin, then continued, "When I first met Steven, he knew I didn't have any training and he pointed me to some small training seminars that the different houses put on, and I took a few here and there. Later when I wore his collar we took a few together, and we had planned to take a couple's session at La Petite Mort but we split up before we could take it."
"He mentioned to me that your dynamics just didn't mesh well enough long-term."
"Yeah, he likes S&M exhibiting just fine, but he's not really that fond of sexual exhibition or really any sort of public displays of affection. Steven's a very private man, and like I said, I used to really like it. He also had some sadistic needs that I couldn't meet, I'm just... I'm just not into pain. Eventually we were both frustrated and miserable and that's when we decided to separate."
Carmine nodded. He licked his bottom lip and said, "I trained for two full sessions at Casa di Bella Nascosta in Italy. That translates to the House of Hidden Beauty. I also did a session at La Petite Mort in California. I have master's standing in both houses. My needs as a top are very tame compared to most, I'm not a sadist although I'm trained in those techniques." Carmine paused and threw Joey a wicked grin. "Of course there's nothing like giving a nice open hand spanking every once in a while."
Joey grinned back and his cheeks were flaming. Carmine figured they just might permanently stay that way by the end of their conversation.
"I like being obeyed and I like completely dominating my submissives. I don't have many personal kinks. I honestly get the most enjoyment out of giving my submissive exactly what they need, I guess you could say that's my kink. I used to like exhibiting, but haven't done it since I was injured. I'm not into blood play, or play piercings or any of the extreme fringes, for me it's all about giving pleasure and not pain. Some of the fetish stuff can be fun, and role-playing can be hot. Lisa... well she had a thing for latex and we played with that quite a bit. My Papa calls me a hopeless romantic that needs a sub with a pet mentality to spoil. I should warn you though that I am overly protective and I will not hesitate to hurt people to protect you. I'm also a jealous bastard that doesn't share with other tops, though I will sometimes invite a second sub to play with us if we're both interested in them. Think you can handle all that?"
Joey swallowed hard and nodded eagerly. "It sounds like we might have a good dynamic mesh, sir. But..."
"But what?" Carmine prodded.
"I still might freak out trying something or have a panic attack," Joey admitted, a little defeated, like he had been given a great present only to have someone rip it out of his hands.
Carmine patted the couch next to him. "C'mere."
Joey settled himself next to him and Carmine wrapped an arm around Joey and said, "I told you before that this thing between us isn't just about sex or dynamics, and I meant that. I want to bring you home to meet my parents and my sisters, and I want to be there in the front row when you get your diploma, and I want to take you to Italy for a real session at my pleasure house and share a mark with you. I want you in my life, Joey, not just my bed. I want to collar you and build that life with you, Joey."
Joey's voice was thick with trying to hold back his emotions. "Your Papa was right, you are a hopeless romantic."
Carmine reached over and clucked Joey's chin and teased, "I know."
"Kiss me? Please, sir," Joey asked softly.
Carmine cupped Joey's cheek with his hand and said before pressing his lips to Joey's, "At least a hundred times day from now on."
Carmine's erection came back in force as they explored each other's mouths and little did Carmine know but Joey's own cock had gotten on board with the party, though his BDU's hid the evidence.
When they pulled back and took a breath, Joey looked to Carmine's cock and asked, "May I, sir?"
Carmine nodded and opened his legs a bit further. Joey rose from the couch and gracefully went to his knees in front of Carmine. He looked up briefly and could see the lust glazing Carmine's eyes and it gave him a little confidence, but he was still hesitant.
Taking a chance, in a low commanding voice Carmine ordered, "Suck me."
It was the absolute right thing to do, and it sent a bolt of desire through Joey. Without any further hesitation he took Carmine's cock in his mouth.
Carmine's head fell back and he closed his eyes in bliss as Joey's lips and tongue worked him. Joey was making happy little sounds and it let Carmine know that the sub was getting just as much out of the experience as he was. Joey knew all the tricks, just how to hold his balls and gently press a finger right behind them, and how to use the other hand to give a squeeze and twist to his cock to accompany what his mouth was doing. It was heaven.
He let Joey steer the show and set the pace, Carmine knew that he could hold his erection as long as he wanted and there was no rush. Lazily he lifted his head and looked down. He enjoyed the show of his cock sliding in and out of Joey's perfect mouth. Joey hadn't deep-throated him, something that Carmine suddenly craved. He placed his hand gently on Joey's head and ordered, "Take it. Take it all."
Joey shifted his position a bit to do so and as he did, his BDU-covered cock brushed against the couch and he came in his pants with a little groan even as he took Carmine's cock deep in his throat.
It only took a few slow of the long deep strokes for Carmine's own release to be upon him and he warned Joey, "I'm going to come now. I'm going to come in your mouth."
As the first salty spurt hit his tongue, Joey responded and took everything that Carmine gave him. It wasn't until Carmine was resting with his head thrown back and trying to calm his breathing that Joey realized that they hadn't discussed condoms. Steven had been the only person he had ever been with willingly without one, even for oral sex.
Joey rested his head on Carmine's thigh and immediately felt Carmine's fingers in his hair, gently stroking, petting.
Carmine's voice was low as he asked, "That was amazing. You okay?"
Joey turned his face and placed a light kiss on Carmine's thigh, not caring that his lips fell on rubbery scars, and replied, "Very okay, sir."
"Good," Carmine said with a grin. Then he asked, "You came too, didn't you?"
Joey swallowed and nodded against Carmine's thigh.
"Good," was Carmine's simple reply as he continued to stroke Joey's head. He purposely did not make a big deal either way even though his ego inside wanted to crow loudly about it, but he didn't want to put any undue pressure on Joey in that particular regard. They sat that way for about a half an hour, just enjoying the closeness.
Carmine shifted and sat up straighter and nudged Joey to do the same so he could see his face. He had never seen Joey look so relaxed or at peace--he was beautiful, and Carmine told him so. "You're beautiful like this, all relaxed and satisfied."
Carmine leaned down and kissed Joey, long and slow and possessive. He pulled back and promised, "I'm going to take you down like this every night, just so I can see you like this. You're so fucking perfect."
Joey shivered and was just gone, high on the afterglow of an intense orgasm and being so completely and thoroughly wanted after thinking no one ever would want him again.
Carmine nudged again and said, "C'mon. You need to get out of those pants before you chafe yourself. Let's go take a shower."
Joey stood, a little wobbly on his feet, and let Carmine lead him to bathroom. Carmine started the shower and turned to Joey. He gently pulled the sub to him and claimed his mouth again and teased, "I still owe you about ninety of those today."
Carmine's hands slipped around Joey and tugged on his still-tucked in t-shirt. As his hands slipped under it to find skin, he took Joey's mouth again, distracting him from what his hands were doing. He pulled back and teased, "Eighty-nine," as he slipped Joey's t-shirt over his head.
He pulled Joey in close, reveling in the skin-to-skin contact, and he nuzzled Joey's neck and said softly, "You're safe with me, Joey. I will never hurt you. Not ever. But I want you to have a safeword, something you can use whenever you need to, okay? I want you to pick something."
Joey didn't say anything right away, he just pressed himself closer to Carmine, so skin hungry he couldn't help himself. After several long minutes he looked up at Carmine with a little grin and said, "Poodle."
Carmine raised an eyebrow in amusement and repeated, "Poodle?"
"Yeah. My last foster family had one and it was the nastiest little dog. I hated that thing."
Carmine chuckled and ran his coarse hands up and down Joey's back. "Okay, poodle it is then."
He kissed Joey and said, "C'mon. Let's get under the hot water."
Carmine's hands slipped between them and deftly unbuttoned Joey's pants and moved to the waistband to hook his fingers and gently push them down. He could see the unconscious worry that his actions brought and he said quietly, "It's just me and you here, and all that's going to happen is we're going to get a little wet and soapy. We're not rushing into anything else."
Joey nodded and moved to assist Carmine in removing his pants and stood nervously naked in front of Carmine.
Carmine made a point of not making a big deal out it until they got into the shower and under the hot spray. He noticed that Joey kept his back turned away from him, an obvious effort to keep him from seeing the scars there. Joey lathered up a cloth with soap and made himself busy bathing Carmine.
Carmine had turned his own back to Joey so he could scrub it and Joey admitted sheepishly as he washed Carmine's shoulders, "These were the first thing I noticed about you. You walked up to the front of the group in that black t-shirt and all I saw were your shoulders."
Carmine turned around with a grin. He took the soapy cloth from Joey's hands and re-lathered it. He gestured with a finger for Joey to turn around. He saw Joey set his jaw tensely, but complied with Carmine's command. Carmine gently scrubbed Joey's back, working very hard to not get angry at his first in-person view of Joey's back. He could feel the tension building in Joey and he said as he ran the soapy cloth over Joey's skin, "I saw you for the first time back at the SGC, you were in he hallway and had your nose stuck in a data pad. My first thought was Christ, he's fucking gorgeous, then I was so surprised that you weren't wearing a collar I couldn't stop staring at your bare neck."
Carmine bent his neck and brushed his lips over the side of Joey's neck and teased, "This neck, right here."
Carmine slipped his arms under Joey's and pulled him back against him and proceeded to continue his scrubbing on Joey's front. As his hands drifted lower, the tension was back in Joey and Carmine whispered near his ear, "You don't have to hide from me, not ever."
"I know. I'm just... embarrassed."
"You never have to be embarrassed, not about this. Besides, you gave my ego an enormous boost by coming just from blowing me earlier. Huge boost."
Joey snorted wryly, "I can't control if or when I do, just so you know."
"I know, Beckett told me. So I'm going to make our first rule. Are you listening?" Carmine dropped the cloth and cupped Joey's flaccid cock gently with his soapy hand.
With a sharp intake of breath, Joey said, "Yes...sir."
"Rule number one, you will come as often as you're able and you won't try to hold it off, but I want to know when you're going to come, so you're going to tell me each and every time. Got it?"
Carmine was softly stroking Joey's cock as he spoke and was pleased when Joey arched back against him and tried to press his cock harder into his hand.
"Got it, sir."
Joey wasn't getting hard in the least that Carmine could feel and he asked gently, "Can you come from this?"
Joey let out a little moan and replied, "I don't think so, sir, but it feels really good anyway."
Carmine chuckled. "Nice. You need to tell me when I'm doing something you like, at least 'til we get to know each other better, alright?"
"Mmm, yes, sir." Joey barely managed to breathe out as Carmine tightened his grip a bit and stroked a little harder.
Carmine amused himself by tormenting Joey's neck with his teeth and mouth while his hand continued to stroke Joey's still-soft cock.
Carmine always enjoyed the responses of the submissives he topped, and he liked finding the things the things that turned them on the most. With Joey, it seemed to just be the simplest of Carmine's caresses and the plain skin to skin contact that had been so devoid in his life since Borden that made Joey the neediest. Carmine grinned against Joey's neck at the thought, he could give Joey as much of that as he would ever want.
Waterlogged, they reluctantly left the shower a while later. The wariness was back again as Joey realized that there was no way he could stand where Carmine wouldn't clearly see his back, he would either see it head-on or as a reflection in the mirrored walls. Carmine saw his distress and said, "Joey, I already know it's there. You don't have to try to hide, remember? It's just me here."
Joey saw the honesty and affection in Carmine's eyes. That made him feel a little braver and he nodded as he found a more natural position to stand in to dry himself off.
Carmine caught glimpses of the scars on Joey's back, but he kept his expression neutral. He could order Joey to just turn around and be done with it, but it wouldn't be productive. He wanted Joey to know that he accepted them as part of him, that they didn't matter in the grand scheme. He could best do that by just ignoring them.
Playfully Carmine rolled up his towel and looped it around the back of Joey's neck and pulled him in closer so he could kiss him.
His stomach growled loudly in the middle of the kiss and Joey looked at the noisy interloper with a silly little smile. Carmine grinned back and said, "I missed lunch. It's been sort of a busy day."
Joey got out, "I'm s..." before Carmine's fingers on his lips shushed him.
"I know, " Carmine said. "So I don't think I actually asked you. I want to collar you, will you accept a collar from me?"
Joey trembled at the question but his words were clear and strong as he replied, "I would be honored to wear your collar, sir."
Carmine pulled him back in for a long possessive kiss then said, "Now that we've got that out of the way. I think you should get dressed and lend me a pair of sweats so I can get back to my quarters and get some clothes without being bare-assed for the masses. Then we're going go find a supply rat that's got a stash of collars, and after that it's going to be food and a big nap together."
Joey blushed and with an odd little grin said, "Yes, sir."
Carmine caught it and asked, "What's that look for?"
Shyly Joey replied, "I miss sleeping with someone."
Carmine reached over and ruffled Joey's wet hair. He admitted honestly, "Me too."
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After they dressed, they both had a chuckle over the sight of Joey's too-short sweat pants on Carmine's long legs, and Carmine the bad ass Navy SEAL in a "Property of the United States Air Force" t-shirt.
They headed for the other tower where Carmine's quarters were housed and had just gotten off the transporter when they saw Colonel Sheppard walking towards them in the corridor.
Both men straightened and Sheppard addressed them, "Commander, Sergeant."
Carmine replied for them both, "Colonel."
Sheppard looked first at Carmine then briefly to Joey and back to Carmine. With a knowing grin - the news of Carmine's little hallway skin show had quickly made the rounds - he asked Carmine, "So should I assume that the issues in our earlier discussion have been resolved, Commander?"
"Affirmative, Sir."
"Good. Glad to hear it. Carry on, gentlemen."
"Thank you, sir."
Colonel Sheppard had taken a few steps past them in the hall when Carmine called after him. "Sir?"
Sheppard paused and turned. "Commander?"
Carmine gestured vaguely in the air towards his neck and asked, "Collars, sir?"
"Ah, see Sergeant Hawkins, he should have something in the lines of a leather field collar that will get you by until you can order something from Earth."
"Thank you, Sir."
Sheppard looked to Joey for a moment, the sub was demurely standing next to the big SEAL. He wasn't meeting Sheppard's eyes, but his entire demeanor was relaxed and stress free, and there was a charming flush to his face and a little smile playing at the corners of his mouth. It all told Sheppard that Olsen was happy with the outcome. He nodded once at Carmine and then continued on his way.
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As it turned out, they wouldn't be needing Sergeant Hawkins' services after all. When they entered Carmine's quarters there was small flat box on his table with a note on top of it.
Carmine picked up the note, knowing it had to be from Adrian or Ramon, as no one else would have entered his quarters uninvited.
Carmine,
Call it a gut feeling or something, man, but I brought this with us hoping you'd find someone. Joey's good for you, and I think you're good for him, so do it right and make Joey family. You know I like him and Adrian adores him, and so will the rest of the clan.
Ramon
PS- Adrian got you both some food, it's in the cooling unit.
Carmine smiled at the note, reminded yet again how blessed he was with family. He opened the box to see a beautiful hand-crafted collar nestled in some tissue. It was similar in craftsmanship to the one that Adrian wore every day, and there was no doubt that it had been made by Ramon's brother Luis. Luis was a skilled silversmith who lived in Arizona. Carmine traced a gentle finger over the hand-hammered links and pieces of turquoise worked into the design. It was, as was all of Luis' work, stunning, and Carmine couldn't think of a submissive that deserved such a beautiful collar more than Joey.
He turned to Joey with the box in his hands, and said with a smile, "Ramon left us a present."
Joey had been trying to casually look at some of the multitude of photos that were around the room. It was the first time he had been in Carmine's private domain and he was curious.
Joey stepped closer and drew in a sharp breath at the sight of the beautiful collar. "That's... it's beautiful. It looks a little like Adrian's."
Carmine laid the box back on the table and picked up the key and unlocked the collar as he said, "Ramon's brother, Luis makes them. He's got a shop in Arizona."
Carmine held an end of the open collar in each hand and asked Joey, "Shall we?"
Joey's eyes flicked from the collar back to Carmine and he asked hesitantly, giving Carmine one final out, "Are you sure, sir, even with everything about me?"
Carmine leaned in over the collar and kissed Joey and said firmly, "I have never been so fucking sure of anything in my whole life, Joey."
Joey opened his mouth to say something, then closed it again in favor of simply hitting his knees in front of Carmine and bowing his neck.
With sure hands Carmine placed the collar around Joey's neck, his nimble fingers securing the lock. It was with that final click of the lock that Carmine felt any remaining worry he had about Joey dissipate. He was confident that he was the patient and understanding Dom that Joey needed to rebuild his shattered self-image, and now with his collar in place he could also protect Joey like he deserved to be protected. Dynamics, sex and everything else would fall into place in their own time.
Carmine gently stroked Joey's head and savored the moment.
His stomach growled again, breaking the serenity and he questioned, "Hungry? The note said that Adrian filled the fridge."
Joey looked up at him, and as long as Carmine lived he would never forget the look of absolute trust and adoration on his sub's face as the light played off the shiny silver now gracing his neck.
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They gratefully ate the meal that Adrian had procured for them, and they laughed seeing the extra portions of dessert in the back of the cooling unit. Adrian and Ramon both had infamous sweet tooths that they seemed to think everyone needed to share.
When they were done, Joey cleared the plates away without a word and Carmine wondered if they were going to be one of those couples that just fell into domestic bliss or if there were going to be bumps in that particular road. He and Lisa had been oil and water, he was tidy by nature and job necessity, she had been a slob. Carmine had liked warm family-style dinners and could even cook most of his favorites. Lisa hated to cook and preferred being taken out to dinner and shown off. He had enjoyed attending more family-type things like nautical festivals, movies, and even amusement parks with his nieces and nephews. Lisa had wanted to go clubbing and attend society functions. The more he thought about it now in retrospec, he could see what his family had seen. His mother had called her shallow and a snob and a gold-digger, and the only thing his Mamma had given Lisa any credit for was that she would have given Carmine beautiful children.
As he mused to himself, Carmine could see Joey looking at some of the pictures he had around his quarters. He couldn't imagine not having anyone to call family. He smiled thinking that Joey no longer had that problem, he just didn't know it yet.
"Hey, grab that photo album over there and let's stretch out. I'll give you a tour of the family tree."
Carmine went to the bed and moved the pillows up to the headboard so they could get comfortable. Joey brought the album over and took off his boots before climbing into bed to sit next to Carmine underneath the welcoming arm he had raised.
The very first picture was that of a beautiful scenic long distance shot of a vineyard in a fertile valley. It was gorgeous shot that belonged in a travel brochure.
"Well, that's home."
"What?" Joey asked, a little confused.
"I grew up there."
"In that town?"
Carmine chuckled. "No, in that vineyard."
Carmine turned the page of the album and there were more photos of the vineyard, its modern winery, and a near mansion-sized ranch house on the property.
Joey asked curiously, "Your parents work there?"
"In a way, I guess. My folks own it. Look, I know we haven't really talked a whole lot about my family, just that there's a lot of us, but there are a few things you should know. We're not... filthy rich exactly, more like very well off. My family has owned that vineyard in California for over a hundred years. It's done well and our family has made a good living from it for several generations now. The Picone name is held in pretty high regard in the area, too, and my Papa is on the city council, like my grandfather was before him.
Joey was intently studying the pictures and tried to imagine what it would have been like to grow up in such a place with parents and family that loved him.
Carmine hesitated a moment before sharing, "I don't normally let people know too much about the vineyard and that whole being well off thing. It gives people the wrong idea sometimes."
Joey nodded and replied, "There are a lot of subs out there that would do anything to be collared by someone with money."
Carmine snorted, "Don't I know it, and my Mamma can see them coming a mile away. She is not shy about calling them gold-diggers to their faces either."
Joey frowned and said quietly, "She's probably going to think that about me, given my background and how fast this has all sort of come about."
"Actually, I think she's going to take to you like a long-lost son. She'll tuck you under her wing and drag you to the kitchen and stuff you full of whatever she's got cooking on the stove while she's gibbering at you a hundred miles an hour about people you don't even know."
"Really?"
"Yup, and Papa will find some subtle way to rescue you and drag you out to his workshop so he can show you all of his little projects. He could spend days out there tinkering."
Joey grinned but Carmine could still see the doubt lingering and said, "Joey, you are the most non-materialistic sub I've ever met. The only time you even mentioned money or spending it was when you were talking about picking your graduate school and what you thought you could afford. Which, by the way, is no longer an issue, you're going to pick the school that you like the best regardless of cost, but we'll talk about that some other time. What I'm trying to say, Joey, is that I didn't think for even one second that you were one of those subs. Not one fucking second. Okay?"
Joey nodded. "I'm sorry. I've just heard it before, when I wore Steven's collar. People assumed that because I was a foster kid that I was only with him for money and prestige and helping my career."
"If anyone says anything to you directly or indirectly this time, I want to know. I will not tolerate you or the validity of your collaring being disrespected, got it?"
"Got it, sir."
"Good," Carmine said and turned the page of the album, "Oh, look, speaking of Mamma and Papa...."
Page by page they went through the album with Carmine sharing tidbits and funny stories about nearly everyone. There were a lot of pictures of Carmine and Adrian as kids and growing up into young men. The two men were the same age and Joey found it interesting to watch them grow up together in pictures to become the men he knew.
Carmine ran a finger absently over a picture of the two of them grab-assing at the beach as teenagers. He smiled, lost in the memory, and said softly, "Don't tell him I said so, but he really is my favorite cousin."
Joey shot Carmine a quick grin, and teased, "We'd never hear the end of it."
Carmine chuckled and closed the album. He squeezed Joey a little closer with the arm around his shoulder and reached over to lay his other hand on Joey's wrist and softly stroke it with his thumb. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the headboard, just savoring the sensations.
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Part 8
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