Fic: Pure Love - Chapter Five
Title/Chapter: Pure Love (05/13+Prologue/Epilogue)
Author: amanda: jaclyn's twin sister / writefiction
Beta: scorpio_15
Artist: creativmind1281
Pairing: Kradam
Rating: PG (nc-17 over all)
Notes: AU, MPREG, written for kradambigbang
Warning: none
Word Count: 2,453
Summary: When Kris starts feeling sick he's sure the only place he can go to for answers is a place he swore he'd never return to. With his boyfriend Adam by his side, he makes the trip back to the town where he grew up. His mother welcomes him back with open arms but when she learns about Kris' illness, she decides it's time he knew the truth about their people.
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CHAPTER FIVE
Two weeks later found Kris and Adam driving a rented car from the airport, through the city and out into the country. After they’d driven twenty minutes over the city line, Adam turned to his boyfriend. “Where the hell is this town you grew up in?!” he exclaimed. “We keep getting further and further away and into the middle of nowhere!”
Kris laughed bitterly. “Don’t worry it’ll only be about ten more minutes till we get to the Sanctuary,” he told Adam.
“Are you sure?” Adam asked. “Maybe you took a wrong turn somewhere?”
Kris gripped the steering wheel tighter, his knuckles turned white and he grit his teeth. “Trust me, Adam. I know where I’m going.”
Adam slid across the bench seat and pressed into Kris’ side. He slid an arm around the younger man’s waist and rested his head on a tense shoulder. “Baby, relax,” he purred soothingly. “How bad can visiting your parents really be?” His words only served to make Kris’ nerves wind tighter. Adam immediately noticed. “Shh, Kris, it’s gonna be okay.”
“This is going to be far from okay,” Kris muttered. “You don’t know what it’s like in Sanctuary. I’m not sure they’ll even let us in.”
“Let us in?” Adam asked.
“You’ll see.”
And Adam did see. When they got closer to the entrance of the town, there were two men standing guard at a small security gate. Before Kris pulled up to the gate, he pushed Adam away, surprising the older man. “Hey, what was that for?” he asked with a pout.
“They definitely won’t let us in if they think we’re more than friends, so no PDA, got it?” Kris said sternly.
“Yeah, okay,” Adam agreed and it was evident by the tone of his voice that he was not happy about being put back in the closet.
When Kris stopped at the gate one of the guards came over and leaned down to the window. Surprise colored his face when he saw Kris. “Kris? Kris Allen?” the guard asked in disbelief.
Kris smiled politely and nodded his head. “How ya doin’, Jerry?”
“Well, I’ll be damned,” Jerry murmured. “What are you doing here? Better yet, where have you been? Your mama has been worried sick! Most people figured you weren’t ever coming back, but your mama… she never gave up hope.”
Kris grit his teeth and forced a smile. “I thought it was time to pay my mama a visit,” he said. “Let her know I’m doing okay.”
Jerry grinned. “She’ll be so happy to see you again. Let me just get the gate and you can pull on in.” Kris nodded and gave the guard a little wave as he let Kris pull onto the Sanctuary’s land.
When they were passed the gate and about a mile down the road, Adam turned to Kris. “So um, how do you know that guy?”
Kris shrugged. “Small town. Everyone knows everyone. Plus, you’re forgetting, I ran away. They probably sent out search parties and put my face on frickin’ milk cartons. The thing you have to remember is, kids don’t just leave the Sanctuary. And if they do, they don’t come back.” When Adam stayed silent, Kris glanced at him. Adam was staring down at his lap, picking at a frayed thread on the knee of his jeans.
Neither of them said anything as Kris cruised slowly down the street, the landmarks as familiar as ever to him. The scenery hadn’t changed in the slightest in the past eight years. Kris really shouldn’t have been surprised. When had anything ever changed in the Sanctuary? He bet his old bedroom was exactly the way he left it too. Suddenly Adam broke the silence, although he did so quietly. “What… what are you going to tell them about me?”
“What do you mean?” Kris asked, glancing out of the corner of his eye at his boyfriend. Adam was still picking at that thread, his head down.
“I just… when they ask who I am, what are you going to tell them?” Kris saw Adam finally lift his head to look at him.
“I can’t…” Kris shook his head. “I’m not going to tell them you’re my boyfriend, Adam. If I want answers, I just can’t.”
“Okay,” Adam whispered. Kris sighed. He knew this was hard for Adam, but it was hard for him too. He wanted his parents and the whole of the Sanctuary to know how in love with Adam he was and how much Adam loved him back. But he knew that his parents, and the whole town, would turn their backs on them, would send them away and they’d be banned from ever returning. Kris just couldn’t risk it, not with so much at stake.
“I’m sorry,” Kris murmured. “But I’ll make it up to you. When we leave here, I promise I’ll make it up to you, okay?”
Adam nodded. “Yeah, okay.” He didn’t sound very convincing. Kris sighed and gripped the steering wheel a little tighter as he looked for the street his childhood home was on. When he found it, he put his blinker on and turned up the street. The two were silent as Kris stopped in front of a red house with a white picket fence surrounding the yard and put the car in park. He turned the engine off and just sat there, trying to remember how to breathe.
Suddenly there was a hand on his arm and a gentle squeeze. “Kris? Are you okay?” Adam asked quietly. Kris turned his head slowly to look at Adam, but didn’t say anything. “Kris?”
“I’m terrified,” Kris murmured.
Adam linked their fingers together and squeezed. “It’s going to be okay, Kris. I’m going to be at your side the whole time. There’s nothing to be afraid of.”
Kris gave Adam a yeah right, look. “You don’t know that. You don’t know what they’re like.”
“They’re your parents, Kris.”
“Who are in a religious cult, Adam.” Kris crossed his arms over his chest, his terror making him a bit defensive. But he couldn’t be blamed as he didn’t know what he was about to face, how hard it was going to be. He didn’t know what his parents would do when they opened the door to find their estranged son standing on their doorstep. He closed his eyes and breathed slowly for a minute, trying to get himself to relax just the slightest bit. Then he looked over at his boyfriend. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m having a little bit of a nervous break down.” He gave Adam an awkward smile.
Adam smiled back and reached over to comb his fingers through Kris’ short hair. “It’s okay,” he told Kris. “I know that today is hard for you and that I’m the safest one to take it out on.” He shrugged.
“You don’t have to come in with me,” Kris said quietly, trying to give Adam an out. But Adam shook his head no.
“I don’t think so, Kris. You’re not getting rid of me that easily. I’m here to help. If those scriptures are true, and there’s a baby inside you, then that baby is mine too, is ours, and we’re doing this together.” Adam gave Kris’ knee a pat. “So lets go up to that door and knock, okay?”
Kris took a deep breath and nodded. “Yeah, okay, yeah.” Then he and Adam climbed from the car. Both had the strong urge to hold hands, but they resisted. Together they walked up to the picket fence and Kris opened the gate and let Adam through first. Kris’ feet felt heavy as they walked up the path way to the front door and his heart started to pound so hard he could hear it in his ears.
“It’s gonna be okay, Kris,” Adam said quietly when he noticed his boyfriend’s face go deathly pale. Kris just bobbed his head, unable to speak, trying to concentrate on his breathing and placing his feet one in front of the other. When he took the last step to the door, he stopped and stared straight ahead. The door was plain white with a gold knocker at eye-level. Kris took a deep, soothing breath and raised his fist to knock, but dropped it back down quickly.
“You do it,” he breathed.
“What?” Adam asked, not sure he’d heard right.
Kris jerked his face around toward his boyfriend. “You do it. I can’t.” Adam nodded and rapped his knuckles against the door. A muffled voice called out from behind the door telling them, “Just a minute!” A moment later the door knob twisted and the white lacquered door swung open. The woman standing before them was petite and heavier than Kris remembered, her hair graying around the edges. It must have been the stress of losing a child, Kris thought. Suddenly he was startled from his scrutinizing by a loud gasp.
“Kristopher!” the woman exclaimed and threw her arms around Kris.
“Hi, Mama,” Kris replied, not hugging back. Although he was sure that his mother didn’t notice with the way she was hugging him so tightly.
She pulled back and held him at arms’ length. “Let me take a look at you.” Her eyes traveled up and down his body and then landed on his face, just studying him. “It’s been too long,” she murmured. “You’ve grown up.”
“It was bound to happen,” Kris muttered. “It’s been eight years.”
“Eight years and three months,” his mother replied, her eyes filling with tears. "Eight long years and three long months. The longest years of my life." She pulled her son close again and kissed his cheek. She held on tightly and Kris wondered if she'd ever let go. But then he heard her sniffle and it tugged at his heart. The sound made his arms move up and wrap around his mother, wanting more than anything to have her stop crying.
"Don't cry, Ma," he murmured.
"It's just... it's been so long. I was scared I had lost you forever," Mrs. Allen replied.
"I'm here now."
Mrs. Allen pulled back and smiled at her son, tears still leaking from her eyes. "Yes, you are. And I couldn't be happier." Without warning she pulled Kris back to her, one hand cradling the back of his head. "I can't believe my baby's back," she whispered, her voice thick with emotion and tears. "I don't want you to ever leave like that again. I know you're all grown up and have a life of your own now but... don't stay away so long next time. Don't make me worry like that again." Kris didn't know what to say so he just gave his mother a gentle squeeze.
When it was obvious his mother wasn't going to be the one to pull away first, Kris untangled himself from her embrace. He didn't want to prolong his visit anymore than he had to, so Kris dove right in. “Mama, I’m sick,” he said.
Mrs. Allen frowned. “You don’t seem to have a fever,” she responded as she touched his forehead.
Kris brushed her hand away. “Not that kind of sick.”
“Then what is it, Kristopher?”
“Mama…” Kris took a deep breath. “I think I’ve been cursed with an unholy child.” Mrs. Allen gasped and clutched at her chest as if she were having chest pains.
“We need to get you to Father Eli right away,” she said. “We need to get this child out of you. You can still be forgiven.”
Kris’ stomach lurched at what he was hearing. “So it’s true?” he asked. “I’m… I’m pregnant? There’s a fetus inside me?”
“It can be taken care of,” Mrs. Allen told him as she reached for his hand. But Kris jerked away from her.
“What aren’t you telling me?!” he shouted.
“Kris, dear, not in front of your friend.” Mrs. Allen nodded in Adam’s direction.
Kris’ chest began to heave with emotion. He needed Adam, he needed the other man to wrap his strong arms around Kris and tell Kris it would be okay. Tell him that he didn’t need these people, that the only ones he needed were Cale and Adam. Kris remembered what he’d told Adam, that he had to lie about who Adam was. But Kris couldn’t do it. He wasn’t going to be forced to hide who he was.
Kris balled his hands into fists at his sides. “His name is Adam,” he ground out. “He’s my boyfriend.”
Kris’ mother gasped. “Oh dear lords in Heaven,” she murmured. “You have to go, right this instant before your father finds the two of you.”
“Mama, I’m not leaving till I get some answers,” Kris said, his jaw still clenched painfully. “Besides, it’s Tuesday and if I know Pop he’s down at the chapel with the guys having scripture study. He won’t be home for hours.”
Mrs. Allen paused as if she were unsure of how to respond, but then she spoke. “Well, yes, he is down at the chapel.” She stopped and peeked her head out the door, looking right and then left. Then she ushered the two men into the house. “I will tell you what you need to know, Kristopher,” she said as she led them from the foyer to the living room and sat down in a wing-backed chair. Kris and Adam sat down next to each other on the couch that was stationed across the room.
“Mama, how am I… how could I be… Mama, I’m a guy,” Kris said.
Mrs. Allen had pulled a handkerchief seemingly out of nowhere and was twisting it tightly with her hands. She sighed heavily. “There is so much you don’t know about, Kristopher, about where we come from.”
Kris frowned. “Where we come from? What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Have you ever wondered about the scriptures? About why we are so against homosexuality?” Mrs. Allen asked.
The frown lines in Kris’ forehead deepened. “No... I just thought the scriptures were some crazy beliefs Father Eli or someone before him came up with and I've never understood the... the hate you all have for homosexuality."
Mrs. Allen bit at her lip a second before speaking. “The scriptures aren't just our beliefs, sweetie, they're our history. Those wars, being banished by the Creator, it all happened to our people.”
Kris stared at his mother for a moment. “I… just… what?” He was so confused, he wasn’t grasping what she was trying to tell him.
“I know this is going to be hard for you to understand but… we’re not from here,” Mrs. Allen told her son. He just raised an eyebrow at her. “We’re not from Earth, Kristopher.”
& & &
Chapter Four | Chapter Six