QAF minor rant
I've had some health issues in the last couple of months, and am currently in recuperation mode after an operation. So I've been catching up on some QAF reading.
In the last few days I've read a couple of stories about Mel and Lindsay's wedding. And they kind of pressed my buttons a bit. So here is a little minor rant about it. Would be interested in hearing what you think.
I'm really, really tired of the double standards that apply so often in QAF - behaviors that Brian gets pilloried for are perfectly acceptable from anyone else.
There are lots of these, but one of the ones that really bugs me is about the wedding and the White Party.
There's the obvious stuff about how everyone expects Brian to somehow "fix" the wedding - despite the fact that they know he doesn't believe in all that stuff, and, more importantly, despite the fact that one of the brides has never stopped telling him and everyone else around them that he's a complete asshole and a selfish narcissist into the bargain. I mean, talk about narcissistic! You revile someone at every given opportunity, but then turn to them and insist that they drop everything to help you when things go wrong for you. That, IMO, is about as selfish and as narcissistic as you can get.
Then there's Lindsay's little number with the white dress and the "did you ever wonder?" moment. Because, seriously, if she did ever wonder, if she is still somewhere inside clinging to that little fantasy, she shouldn't be even considering getting married. That's bad enough. But then there's the spiteful little assassin's dagger she plants between his ribs. What she effectively says to him is "I don't want you at my wedding because you're just the hedonistic asshole Melanie always says you are, so go to the White Party and fuck yourself stupid so there's nothing to spoil my fantasy day."
I hate the way that his "friends" seem to have no concept that Brian has feelings that might conceivably be hurt by the way they treat him.
And then there's Justin.
To understand how I feel about Justin in this episode, let's think about the aborted trip to Vermont. They have plans to go away together. Brian, faced with a crisis that could destroy his whole career, has to cancel. True, he doesn't really explain the details to Justin or, one assumes, to anyone else. But at least he has a valid, concrete, reason for canceling their plans for a holiday together.
Justin, having accepted his invitation to the White Party, decides to cancel on him for no other reason than there's something else he'd rather do. And at no point does anyone even seem to feel that Brian might feel disappointed, or rejected or even hurt by Justin's change of mind. There's no acknowledgement by anyone, least of all by Justin, that Brian has any right to feel anything about being suddenly told, "Sorry, but I've changed my mind. There's other people I'd rather spend that time with."
From the first time I saw this episode I seriously wanted to slap Justin silly. At the very least, I wanted someone to call him on being a totally selfish, thoughtless little shit. But of course, no one ever did, because ... well, it's only Brian. And everyone knows Brian doesn't have any feelings to be hurt. Don't they?
But see ... I believe it's shit like this that makes it harder than ever for Brian to trust. And his friends - and Justin - pull this kind of shit on him constantly through all five seasons. I'm not surprised he doesn't really trust any of them to be there for him. I wouldn't either. Because none of them ever really demonstrate that they will be, not when it counts, not when it means they need to give something up to help him. None of them.
And it pisses me off.
Okay - rant over.
But do let me know what you think.
.
In the last few days I've read a couple of stories about Mel and Lindsay's wedding. And they kind of pressed my buttons a bit. So here is a little minor rant about it. Would be interested in hearing what you think.
I'm really, really tired of the double standards that apply so often in QAF - behaviors that Brian gets pilloried for are perfectly acceptable from anyone else.
There are lots of these, but one of the ones that really bugs me is about the wedding and the White Party.
There's the obvious stuff about how everyone expects Brian to somehow "fix" the wedding - despite the fact that they know he doesn't believe in all that stuff, and, more importantly, despite the fact that one of the brides has never stopped telling him and everyone else around them that he's a complete asshole and a selfish narcissist into the bargain. I mean, talk about narcissistic! You revile someone at every given opportunity, but then turn to them and insist that they drop everything to help you when things go wrong for you. That, IMO, is about as selfish and as narcissistic as you can get.
Then there's Lindsay's little number with the white dress and the "did you ever wonder?" moment. Because, seriously, if she did ever wonder, if she is still somewhere inside clinging to that little fantasy, she shouldn't be even considering getting married. That's bad enough. But then there's the spiteful little assassin's dagger she plants between his ribs. What she effectively says to him is "I don't want you at my wedding because you're just the hedonistic asshole Melanie always says you are, so go to the White Party and fuck yourself stupid so there's nothing to spoil my fantasy day."
I hate the way that his "friends" seem to have no concept that Brian has feelings that might conceivably be hurt by the way they treat him.
And then there's Justin.
To understand how I feel about Justin in this episode, let's think about the aborted trip to Vermont. They have plans to go away together. Brian, faced with a crisis that could destroy his whole career, has to cancel. True, he doesn't really explain the details to Justin or, one assumes, to anyone else. But at least he has a valid, concrete, reason for canceling their plans for a holiday together.
Justin, having accepted his invitation to the White Party, decides to cancel on him for no other reason than there's something else he'd rather do. And at no point does anyone even seem to feel that Brian might feel disappointed, or rejected or even hurt by Justin's change of mind. There's no acknowledgement by anyone, least of all by Justin, that Brian has any right to feel anything about being suddenly told, "Sorry, but I've changed my mind. There's other people I'd rather spend that time with."
From the first time I saw this episode I seriously wanted to slap Justin silly. At the very least, I wanted someone to call him on being a totally selfish, thoughtless little shit. But of course, no one ever did, because ... well, it's only Brian. And everyone knows Brian doesn't have any feelings to be hurt. Don't they?
But see ... I believe it's shit like this that makes it harder than ever for Brian to trust. And his friends - and Justin - pull this kind of shit on him constantly through all five seasons. I'm not surprised he doesn't really trust any of them to be there for him. I wouldn't either. Because none of them ever really demonstrate that they will be, not when it counts, not when it means they need to give something up to help him. None of them.
And it pisses me off.
Okay - rant over.
But do let me know what you think.
.