036 [TEXT

[worksmart]

WARNING: INFECTIOUS DISEASE

The sheep currently attacking the city are carrying a viral disease. Anyone with a sheep bite or prolonged exposure to any of the animals should report to the City Hospital immediately for post-exposure prophylaxis. Do not wait until you're showing symptoms. Otherwise stay inside if possible. Disinfect any areas that

Comments

Voice; Thanks to Solomon-mun... -___-'

[justcautious]

'ow are condoms goin' t'be useful after a sheep attack?
...
They ain't...y'know...?!

Voice; Soooob

[worksmart]

What? I don't think the sheep are just trying to cuddle.

Voice;

[justcautious]

S-so...the sheep are...the sheep are rapin' people?!

Voice;

[worksmart]

[Oh the longest pause. The longest pause ever. He can't even pretend he misheard the accent.]

What are you talking about?

Voice;

[justcautious]

Jus' what y'said! Needin' prophy-whotsits after bein' taken down by sheep! Though I still dunno what good they'd do after the fact...

Voice; 1/2

[worksmart]

...Prophylactics? Post-exposure prophylactics?

Voice;

[worksmart]

Oh, God.

Voice;

[justcautious]

So it won't help, then?! What d'we do?!

Voice;

[worksmart]

Detective Constable Skelton, prophylactic comes from the Greek for 'preventative measure'. A post-exposure prophylactic would be a series of treatments preventing an infection from developing. A rubber prophylactic is what you use when you can't afford child support.

Voice;

[justcautious]

Oh. Okay. So th'sheep are jus' regular sheep, then, not rapist sheep? I mean, besides them bein' zombies, obviously.

Voice;

[worksmart]

They're not zombies. Haven't been close enough to one to find out if they're rapists, but try tracking down a New Zealander and let me know.

Voice; 1/2

[justcautious]

Actually, there were this one bloke I knew, criminal, Sticky Dicky Fingers an' he--

Voice;

[justcautious]

Though I s'pose 'e's dead now. Wouldn't be right. An' I meant only sort of zombies. That's what Beckett says, anyway.

Voice;

[worksmart]

[Another one of those pauses. Any other day he'd find it funnier, Chris.] Beckett's not a doctor. Zombies are dead things re-animated. You might as well call a rabid dog a zombie.

Voice;

[justcautious]

Yeah, but 'ow d'we know? I mean, maybe if y'planted one o'them plants in a graveyard it'd grow a human copy. Could be zombies.

Voice;

[worksmart]

Right. Fine. It could be zombies. Luckily, no one's trying to treat the sheep.