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This might just be the worst day of my life, a living nightmare. I was subbing at the high school, a 9th grade class and includes some bad students. There are usually two teachers in the class, but there was no sub for the other one so it was only me
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OK you know that epiphany i had?? I feel right now is the time to share... not in email but on here.
First of all.. this is not a perfect world. THere are those that will try your patience. THe most you can do is NOT lose your cool.. But yea something like this happened to a friend and he has now been black listed for 2yrs. Not to scare you.
NOW for the other... for some reason i thought of my friend Steve. I am really seeing a connection between you and him... and its a warning. More or less i dont want to see you TURN into him. He's barely into his 30's... and he has a job... lives at home... he cant figure out why he cant meet any decent women. HE only focuses on the net... wont move out... NOW i have seen and heard this from the "outside" girl part. ONe of my friends met him and as she said she sees things...
1) They see that he STILL LIVES at home! First of all thats a bad thing for a female. March is coming up soon... remember your goal?
2) They see the fact that he has ONE degree but wont better himself with another degree or keep up with his education. There are things to do to keep up with the education... to further your degree. He refuses.. doesn't see the need to.. makes a living, but not a very good one as in.. its all he does.
3) HE RELIES strictly on the net for meeting girls!! HE does NOT get away from the net to meet women... hes shy... quiet.. and refuses to jump out of his shell like every man has before him (and if they say its easy for them, they lie).
4) NOW i see and notice you watch alot of reality shows... and i have seen and heard you place yourself or compare yourself to these people. First of all they are 1 in 500,000,000. You are a individual... live as one. Have you thought about stopping the reality shows? Its weird to say but maybe you should.
ok i hate to say these but PLEASE dont take them the wrong way. Look how long we have known each other and i dont mean this in a wrong way. But you cant keep doing subbing all your life. You cant keep living at home... YOU Need to create your OWN adventure!! Makes things work for you. Make yourself venture out of your shell... yes its going to be hard... but you seriously need to.
I dont want to see you turn into Steve but im seeing it. You dont want to get that bad... trust me. You need to venture away... do the school thing.. maybe become a teacher!! your great at that kind of thing. WHILE your doing that, keep writing.. NOTHING is holding you away from that.
but maybe this seems pointless but after reading this... i couldn't handle it. You cant get upset over this... this is a small thing... just stay with the truth... and find other work.. save up... move out... go to a University... WORK on that TEACHING degree.. OR ANY degree you want... find people there... get out more in public and away from the TV and the net. I know there is potential for you to make something of yourself... something great. BUT dont ever hold yourself back because of fear or "not in your comfort zone".
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Makes perfect sense....
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Thing is, you didn't tell me anything I didn't already know and spend a lot of time thinking myself. I know I need to make the changes to improve my life. And I don't like who I am.
The situation that happened with the student is a bad thing, but is also a help to lead me in the new direction that I need. It's the opportunity provided to get away from subbing and in to something else without me having to make that step myself. I do hold myself back in fear of leaving my comfort zone.
I do spend to much time online and allow it to consume to much of my life. That's one reason while working on the cruise would be good for me. Would keep me away and be forced to spend my time elsewhere. And also to meet and associatte with people and gain my independence.
Only thing I dispute you on is the need to stop watching reality tv, just because I made a couple posts about comparing myself to the geeks doesn't mean I dwell on it. I was just trying to make a post.
One of these days I hope to make you and myself proud.
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Cruises are fine... but i'll just say its not the answer. First of all they are hard to get in.. my friend Nikki the singer, wasn't even accepted.. even tho shes a singer. BUT just remember they are only for the job. You still will be living at home right??? How will you meet girls more steadly?? Also Cruise ships offer email and net so you wouldn't exactly be getting away from it.. since for some thats the only connection you'll have with family.
as for the reality.. remmember we have been talking for a long time... you talk about them all the time and even talked about wanting to join. You haven't said it, but i have read it between the lines with you. Im just saying is get away from TV.. get away from the net.
The adventure im taking about for you, getting that education... makign something of yourself higher up. So this situation wont happen again. move away from family... NOT in the same town, but like we talked before, go to a Uni.. do something there... lots of ways of meeting single females your age there.
Remind me to tell you about Chris.. hes 30.. finaly moved away from home (150 miles from)... went to school... met a girl there 6 months ago, and now is engaged to her. As he said himself, he would have NEVER met her if he hadn't forced himself to expand... jump out of his shell and force himself that move. Who's to say the one your to meet has net right?? MAybe she attends the uni???
Keep your possibilities open. Unlike Steve, who still bitches and complains about not meeting women despite me giving him the same advice. he comes up with every excuse in the book not to move out or move away.
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