Realization
I've just noticed that I never formally said that Michael and I broke up. Yep, it's over. I ended it on May 2nd, 2008. It's sad I remember that. I was at SunFest, watching Fergie with my mom when I get a call.
Why did you change your Facebook status to It's Complicated?
What do you mean Michael? And you don't even have a Facebook...
I looked at it. What do you mean It's Complicated? What's going on?
I was being watched. I couldn't do anything without having it broadcasted. Each wrong move was put on replay for the next month. I broke up with him on the phone. I could feel his tears, they were my own. I was completely distraught, screaming out of anger and sadness. I didn't want to end it, but I couldn't stand him anymore. For the last few months of our relationship I couldn't even touch him. The sight of him infuriated me, and on the rare occasions it didn't, he would say something so utterly rudeI was instantly insulted.
It ended. On Sunday he begged me to be with him again. I shot him down. I didn't want any part of that mess. And this happened online.
Funny thing is that I was going to break up with him that Saturday. I already warned his mom to watch over him for the next few days. I knew what I was going to say. I was ready. But he ruined my plans....one last time.
We didn't talk for awhile after I graduated. It was too hard. Then we started talking again. It hurt most when he got a new girlfried two weeks after we broke up. Two weeks after that they were having sex. HEAR THAT WORLD?!?! SEX!!!!!! I was done. That was the final straw. He'd call me and I couldn't stop yelling at him. It hurt so much. All the anger I kept inside for the last 6 months of our relationship was never let out. So...I burst.
We haven't talked in months. I haven't seen him or anything. My friends have, though, and they say he looks terrible. All strung out and gross. He's making bad choices now. It still hurts to think about him, but at least I can sleep now.
Despite all that has happened, I only wish the best for him. I want him to succeed, to prosper. I'm not sure if he deserves the best, but he can at least try to attain it himself. I miss him sometimes. I gave my mom the ring he gave me, told her to put it out of my sight. The sight of it twists that knife in my hard a little bit more each time I look at it. I really just want to forget.
Why did you change your Facebook status to It's Complicated?
What do you mean Michael? And you don't even have a Facebook...
I looked at it. What do you mean It's Complicated? What's going on?
I was being watched. I couldn't do anything without having it broadcasted. Each wrong move was put on replay for the next month. I broke up with him on the phone. I could feel his tears, they were my own. I was completely distraught, screaming out of anger and sadness. I didn't want to end it, but I couldn't stand him anymore. For the last few months of our relationship I couldn't even touch him. The sight of him infuriated me, and on the rare occasions it didn't, he would say something so utterly rudeI was instantly insulted.
It ended. On Sunday he begged me to be with him again. I shot him down. I didn't want any part of that mess. And this happened online.
Funny thing is that I was going to break up with him that Saturday. I already warned his mom to watch over him for the next few days. I knew what I was going to say. I was ready. But he ruined my plans....one last time.
We didn't talk for awhile after I graduated. It was too hard. Then we started talking again. It hurt most when he got a new girlfried two weeks after we broke up. Two weeks after that they were having sex. HEAR THAT WORLD?!?! SEX!!!!!! I was done. That was the final straw. He'd call me and I couldn't stop yelling at him. It hurt so much. All the anger I kept inside for the last 6 months of our relationship was never let out. So...I burst.
We haven't talked in months. I haven't seen him or anything. My friends have, though, and they say he looks terrible. All strung out and gross. He's making bad choices now. It still hurts to think about him, but at least I can sleep now.
Despite all that has happened, I only wish the best for him. I want him to succeed, to prosper. I'm not sure if he deserves the best, but he can at least try to attain it himself. I miss him sometimes. I gave my mom the ring he gave me, told her to put it out of my sight. The sight of it twists that knife in my hard a little bit more each time I look at it. I really just want to forget.