Hell Breaks Loose 5/?
Title: Hell Breaks Loose 5/?
Author: Maggsie! (me)
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Pairing: Emily/JJ, JJ/Will
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Unfortunately I do not own any of the characters
Spoilers: Just WIll and Henry
AN: This has not been beta-ed due to the unavailability of darkbardzero
AN2: But this is dedicated to her :) Get well soon!
Summary: When problems occur in JJ and Will's relationship, what will it mean for JJ and Emily?
Emily walked in to the empty BAU bullpen, sighing in relief as she saw that neither Morgan nor Reid was there. The profiler had decided to come into work early, after a night of tossing and turning over thoughts of JJ. Every time she had shut her eyes, all she saw was the blonde and Will kissing, the kiss in Miami. JJ wasn’t ready to leave her husband, Emily thought and obviously the liaison still loved him. That made something in Emily’s stomach flip, and she swallowed to get it back down. If JJ loved Will, then she’d have to learn to deal with it. If the blonde wasn’t willing to leave him for her, then Emily wasn’t going to make her. The ball was in the blonde’s court.
Placing her stuff on her desk, she glanced up at Hotch’s office, and saw him through the window on the phone. She wondered if JJ was even in yet, she was usually one of the first ones in, but that was before Henry had been born. Her priorities had changed since then, and rightly so. Looking down at her watch, she figured she had another half an hour before Hotch wanted them in to talk about the profile.
Striding over to the coffee pot, she poured herself a cup and turned around to lean against the counter top. She loved being in the BAU bullpen first thing in the morning, before everything got busy and it was filled with hustle and bustle. It allowed her time to think about things, work and her personal life without becoming distracted by anything else.
She loved her team, they were family, but sometimes she just loved the peace and quiet and this was one of those times. Emily knew that when Morgan came in, if she wasn’t right and she was deep in thought, he would immediately notice. He was one of her best friends after all, but JJ wasn’t something she could talk to him about. It would make things more complicated than they already were. It was already going to be tough enough being just professional with JJ, but if they weren’t acting normal it would be picked up on more or less straight away.
Emily and JJ had always had a close relationship, and they had a kind of routine in the morning. One of them would take the other a coffee, and mid way through the morning the blonde would come out into the bullpen and come and talk to her. Then there were the touches and the glances, but the brunette didn’t feel right trying to act normal, too much had happened. She was in love with JJ, and she couldn’t just put that to one side. But she had to; she knew that, for the sake of the team, JJ’s marriage, Henry, and their careers.
There was obviously too much risk for JJ to take it, and in some way Emily couldn’t blame her. The blonde had a family, she was in love with him, and he wasn’t that bad of a man, the profiler had to admit. But JJ had confessed her love to the brunette, and that was what hurt the most, knowing she wasn’t worth the sacrifice. Knowing she wasn’t worth the risk to start a relationship.
Walking back over to her desk, she sat in her seat and leaned forward to rest her head in her hands, rubbing her temples with her thumbs, trying to rub away the headache that was starting to form. There was so much going on in her head, and she just wanted it all to go away. She wanted to go back to before she kissed JJ, when she didn’t know JJ loved her. Not knowing would be better than feeling the hurt she was, having experienced what it could be like with JJ and Henry. Last night had been one of the best of her life, and then it had just been ripped away from her cruelly. She was jealous of Will; he got to experience that every single day.
Leaning back in her chair, she lifted the coffee mug up to her lips to take a sip, but spluttered it out as she felt a hand on her shoulder. Bringing her hand to her chest, trying to stop herself from choking, she turned her seat around to come face to face with Garcia. She had been so lost in thought that she hadn’t heard the tech analyst come up behind her.
“Hey Garcia.”
She greeted as cheerfully as she could, not wanting Garcia to pick up on anything. When the quirky blonde wanted to know something, she was like a dog with a bone.
“Morning Princess. You looked deep in thought there...everything okay?”
Garcia asked, never missing a beat. Grabbing Morgan’s chair, she wheeled it up next to Emily’s desk to take a seat next to her. She had been watching the brunette for a couple of minutes before she let on she was there, and the analyst knew there was something going on in the pretty brunette’s head.
“I’m fine Garcia.”
Emily stated, as she turned her chair towards Garcia. The blonde leaned forward, her elbows resting on her knees, as she took the profiler’s hands in hers.
“No you’re not. I can’t help unless you talk to me.”
The brunette looked up, meeting Garcia’s stare. However quirky she was, Garcia was always there to talk to, she was a good friend. The only problem was that she was JJ’s best friend, and it could make things a little awkward. Sighing, Emily knew she wasn’t going to get out of this however hard she tried, so she bit the bullet.
“I’m guessing you know that I kissed JJ.”
“Yeah she told me, and she kissed you back.”
Emily knew that, she knew that JJ had told Garcia, they were best friends after all. Emily didn’t mind that the quirky blonde knew, everyone needed someone they could talk to. Usually JJ was the brunette’s confidante but this was something that she couldn’t talk to her about.
“I don’t know what to do Garcia.”
The brunette confessed, as she looked down at their joined hands. The quirky blonde squeezed her hands gently, and Emily looked back up to meet Garcia’s gaze. She could see the understanding in her eyes, and she smiled gently. The analyst reached up and brushed a strand of loose hair behind the brunette’s ear.
“What do you want to do Em? What do you want to happen?”
Emily swallowed hard, trying to stop the sob that was about to come out. She had always been an emotional person, but it was something she tried to hide at work. But this thing with JJ had tipped her over the edge, and it seemed like now the flood gates were open, she couldn’t seem to stop it.
“I want to be with her, all of her. I want to be a family, her, me and Henry. Last night...last night, was the best night of my life -“
“Em...”
“And I just want that all the time. Now I’ve experienced it, I never want to lose it. But there’s Will, and she isn’t prepared to leave him for me-“
“Em...”
“I just...I just love her so much, and it hurts because I obviously love her more than she loves me...and I’m obviously not worth the sacrifice-“
“Em...”
The brunette stopped talking, as Garcia broke through her speech. She hadn’t realised how much she had confessed, but it obviously needed to be said. And if she was honest, it felt like a little bit of weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She took in the quirky blonde’s expression, her mouth was agape and she was looking past the profiler’s shoulder. She turned to her right, to see that Morgan and Reid had turned up, but they were lost in their own conversation. Gulping, she turned her chair round, and came face to face with the object of her affections. She took in JJ’s sympathetic smile, and quickly turned round to face Garcia, who suddenly had a big grin on her face. She had been set up!
The quirky blonde stood up, squeezed her arm gently, before heading back to her hole. Suddenly feeling the courage, she turned round again to face JJ, but kept looking down at the floor, highly embarrassed at being caught.
“How long have you been standing there?”
Emily whispered, finding her shoes very interesting.
“I heard all of it. Emily...”
JJ was cut off by Hotch’s booming voice from the stairs.
“We have another body.”
x x x
“It’s the same MO, but because we had people watching the landfill site he’s had to change his dumping ground.”
Emily stated. The whole team was surrounding the victim; a 35 year old Caucasian male...Jason McGregor. A single slit along his throat, the same as all the other victims. A phone call to Garcia had confirmed that he had also been on the sex offender’s register. He had been thrown on to the side of the quiet street like a bag of rubbish, and so far there were no witnesses.
JJ was stood right next to Emily, both finding it hard to have all their focus on work. Their arms were touching and the brunette could feel her arm tingling from the touch.
“Will...”
The blonde whispered, and Emily’s head snapped up to where JJ was looking. The Cajun was walking towards them and liaison turned back to look at Emily, trying to get through to her using her eyes but the brunette wasn’t looking at her. All her focus was on the man walking towards them, and she knew the profiler had tensed up at seeing him.
The rest of the profilers turned to him, as he joined their circle they had formed as they were bouncing around things. JJ frowned as he held out his hand to shake hands with them, everyone except Emily.
“Detective.”
Emily sneered, and Will turned to her. They stared at each other for a few moments, and JJ could swear she could cut the tension in the air with a knife. All she wanted to do was reach back and take Emily’s hand in hers, to try and put across that she was there for her. But she couldn’t do that in front of everyone, particularly not Will. They just needed some time alone, but it seemed to be hard to get at the moment.
“Agent Prentiss.”
Will replied, as he turned to JJ, a smile spreading across his face. Emily was finding it hard not to knock that smirk off his face, or tell him everything that had happened between his wife and herself. But she was more mature than that.
“What are you doing here Will?”
JJ demanded, very surprised to see him at the crime scene. He hadn’t mentioned anything about being on the case to her and she had asked him about work just the night before. Hotch looked just as surprised as she did.
“I’m lead detective on the case.”
“Since when?”
“Since now.”
The Cajun stated, turning to Hotch so therefore missing JJ’s glare at him. She couldn’t quite believe she was in this position; she was stood in between her husband and the person she loved. She wasn’t sure things could get any more complicated than they were. JJ turned round too, risking a glance at Emily. She could see the hurt on her face, but that quickly turned when she put her professional mask on again.
After what she’d heard Emily telling Garcia, she was determined to make the brunette see that it was her she wanted. She couldn’t go on letting Emily think otherwise.
“Emily, Reid, I want you to go with the local police and see if anyone around here did see anything. They may just be scared, but you know the questions to ask. Morgan and Rossi, I want you to go to the coroner’s office and talk to him. I will stay here. JJ, I want you to go with Will and talk to the victim’s family...”
“Sir, do you think that’s a good idea?”
JJ asked, motioning between herself and Will. She didn’t dare to look at Emily right then, she was worried about what she would see. Will just had a big grin on his face.
“Yes, I’m sure. You’re the best person to talk to the family.”
The blonde nodded, turning away and walking away with Will. Emily watched her walk away until she was out of sight, before shaking her head and going back to the job in hand. Her personal life had to wait for now.