excerpt from Fragile Bones
I have no clue if anyone is reading these, but I'm having fun posting these little teasers. :)
I finished chapter 22 this evening and those boys sure do surprise me. This takes place about a week after the previous excerpt... Michael just returned and found Nathan in a state. After shaking him back to reality, this little scene takes place and ends the chapter:
“I'm sorry,” I said again. “You were right. I went too far. There's no excuse for me this time.”
“If that's the worst you'll do, it's hardly a reason for such drastic self-punishment.”
“You were gone for so long,” I whined a little.
“It's difficult to remember what the pressure feels like. It's such a distant memory for me now. I know what you're going through, but it's knowledge, not empathy. Then when you give in to your strong urges, I'm taken back to the time when I, too, couldn't repress them.” He sagged. “I must be strong for you. For both of us. Sometimes that strength feels too feeble a thread to hold us both. Then I have to leave. It's I who should apologize to you.”
“You're afraid.”
He looked at me hard. “It's an emotion I have little experience with.”
“It makes you more human,” I said. “And what if I don't need you to be strong for me? What if what I need is for you to bend a little?”
“In bending, I may snap. You don't know what I'm capable of.”
“I have an idea, but I trust you. How long has it been? How long since you've even tried to love someone?”
“I can't allow myself that luxury.”
“I would have you be weak for me just for a little while. But I'm beginning to learn that's selfish and self-centered of me. I should be happy for what little I get.”
“What little? You still can't comprehend how difficult it is for me to be around you? Over a century, I've put aside my desires. My craving for flesh. My most insidious, carnal compunctions to devour, to satiate myself on the bodies of countless people. And you sit there and tell me to tear down those walls. The little I can give is all that I have to give.”
I didn't know what to say. His confession lashed at me. I took all of him and kept demanding more.
“Can I apologize forever?” I asked. “If I keep saying, 'I'm sorry,' will you continue to forgive me? Every time I push the boundary you created, will your resolve weaken until it finally breaks? I'm sorry. I'm sorry!” I wanted to scream at him, but my voice trickled down to a whisper. “I'm sorry. I'll break for you so you'll remain strong. And I'll keep saying it until the end of time: I'm sorry. I'm sorry...”
Tears ran down my cheeks. To such a place we'd come.
I began to wonder if this journey wasn't just about me, but the both of us.
Things are moving right along at a pace I'm happy with. I'm hoping to have this story finished by the end of Feb; then on to line edits. And if things go according to my wishes, I'll have this available for purchase sometime in June. :)
I finished chapter 22 this evening and those boys sure do surprise me. This takes place about a week after the previous excerpt... Michael just returned and found Nathan in a state. After shaking him back to reality, this little scene takes place and ends the chapter:
“I'm sorry,” I said again. “You were right. I went too far. There's no excuse for me this time.”
“If that's the worst you'll do, it's hardly a reason for such drastic self-punishment.”
“You were gone for so long,” I whined a little.
“It's difficult to remember what the pressure feels like. It's such a distant memory for me now. I know what you're going through, but it's knowledge, not empathy. Then when you give in to your strong urges, I'm taken back to the time when I, too, couldn't repress them.” He sagged. “I must be strong for you. For both of us. Sometimes that strength feels too feeble a thread to hold us both. Then I have to leave. It's I who should apologize to you.”
“You're afraid.”
He looked at me hard. “It's an emotion I have little experience with.”
“It makes you more human,” I said. “And what if I don't need you to be strong for me? What if what I need is for you to bend a little?”
“In bending, I may snap. You don't know what I'm capable of.”
“I have an idea, but I trust you. How long has it been? How long since you've even tried to love someone?”
“I can't allow myself that luxury.”
“I would have you be weak for me just for a little while. But I'm beginning to learn that's selfish and self-centered of me. I should be happy for what little I get.”
“What little? You still can't comprehend how difficult it is for me to be around you? Over a century, I've put aside my desires. My craving for flesh. My most insidious, carnal compunctions to devour, to satiate myself on the bodies of countless people. And you sit there and tell me to tear down those walls. The little I can give is all that I have to give.”
I didn't know what to say. His confession lashed at me. I took all of him and kept demanding more.
“Can I apologize forever?” I asked. “If I keep saying, 'I'm sorry,' will you continue to forgive me? Every time I push the boundary you created, will your resolve weaken until it finally breaks? I'm sorry. I'm sorry!” I wanted to scream at him, but my voice trickled down to a whisper. “I'm sorry. I'll break for you so you'll remain strong. And I'll keep saying it until the end of time: I'm sorry. I'm sorry...”
Tears ran down my cheeks. To such a place we'd come.
I began to wonder if this journey wasn't just about me, but the both of us.
Things are moving right along at a pace I'm happy with. I'm hoping to have this story finished by the end of Feb; then on to line edits. And if things go according to my wishes, I'll have this available for purchase sometime in June. :)