My Random,RANDOM thoughts...
WARNING!:If u do not wish to know my thoughts or what i REALLY think and feel then DO NOT i repeat DO NOT Read On. You've been Warned...
I hate writing this stuff in my Xanga becuz i find that i have to water it down or make it so other ppl cant read it and i dont like that.My livejournal has NEVER Been sugar coated,and i wont begin now!I also find that when i write i'm able to elaborate the things i think and feel and say them a hell of a lot better without actually speaking and that i think is priceless and is truly more worth the time to explain myself.
This entry is more for Chris than anything but i still wanted to write it because its a part of me and if u want to know what's been on my mind lately then here it is.
I'm completely and totally in love with Chris!! i know i've stated this before but i dont think i could say it enough.I do however keep some things in from even Chris thinking that i'm gonna embarass myself or sound stupid or crazy.And honestly,if it looks that way then maybe i am and i kinda feel like i shouldnt care anymore and just say what it is.I think i should be able to say what i want and not feel stupid.So here goes...
Chris...hold ur breath.
(its not that shocking ppl really,but the dramatic disclaimer helped me a little)
*********
Lately..or maybe more like it recently..i've really thought about Chris and i and i know we joke about certain things.Random things.But really an truly i wondered ,and have to admit that i kinda wish that Chris was "The One".There i said it.lol.But i really do.FOR THE SIMPLE FACT That i could either be getting ahead of myself(which isnt like me so it makes me wonder why) or i'm just really into Chris and yeah ppl begin to think.I wasnt lying when i said that I hope ur the one,If not...You're the protype.that songs rings true. Maybe u are...maybe u arent..but i know if u arent he'll be a lot like u !!Becuz i'm loving my life right now and its becuz ur in it.So if he isnt you then now i know what to look for and how i want to feel if that someone isnt you.I guess thats not so bad as i thought but i think "that subject" is kinda touchy and maybe not the best thing to say to someone like hmmm 3 months in.Yeah i wanted to share that...especially with u Chris cuz ur girl is slightly retarted lol.not really but i feel like it sometimes for thinking that but hey,its the truth.i dunno.Its crossed my mind a few times.Maybe becuz even if i'm not trying to i dream of us being together like literally Years down the road and i love how things are now so i guess i kinda wonder what it would be like if i found out that he was the one or if i knew that i wouldnt have to let him go someday.I could just be selfish too.Just curiousity i suppose.Its no biggie but i did have to mention that i sometimes do think about it.I dunno if that makes me weird or if he'll run screaming but i suppose if i'm weird i'm weird and if he'll run screaming then so be it but its my thoughts and it is only a thought.i'm not planning a wedding or anyhing guys.I think i'll pass on that for several more years.so there u have it.
I hate writing this stuff in my Xanga becuz i find that i have to water it down or make it so other ppl cant read it and i dont like that.My livejournal has NEVER Been sugar coated,and i wont begin now!I also find that when i write i'm able to elaborate the things i think and feel and say them a hell of a lot better without actually speaking and that i think is priceless and is truly more worth the time to explain myself.
This entry is more for Chris than anything but i still wanted to write it because its a part of me and if u want to know what's been on my mind lately then here it is.
I'm completely and totally in love with Chris!! i know i've stated this before but i dont think i could say it enough.I do however keep some things in from even Chris thinking that i'm gonna embarass myself or sound stupid or crazy.And honestly,if it looks that way then maybe i am and i kinda feel like i shouldnt care anymore and just say what it is.I think i should be able to say what i want and not feel stupid.So here goes...
Chris...hold ur breath.
(its not that shocking ppl really,but the dramatic disclaimer helped me a little)
*********
Lately..or maybe more like it recently..i've really thought about Chris and i and i know we joke about certain things.Random things.But really an truly i wondered ,and have to admit that i kinda wish that Chris was "The One".There i said it.lol.But i really do.FOR THE SIMPLE FACT That i could either be getting ahead of myself(which isnt like me so it makes me wonder why) or i'm just really into Chris and yeah ppl begin to think.I wasnt lying when i said that I hope ur the one,If not...You're the protype.that songs rings true. Maybe u are...maybe u arent..but i know if u arent he'll be a lot like u !!Becuz i'm loving my life right now and its becuz ur in it.So if he isnt you then now i know what to look for and how i want to feel if that someone isnt you.I guess thats not so bad as i thought but i think "that subject" is kinda touchy and maybe not the best thing to say to someone like hmmm 3 months in.Yeah i wanted to share that...especially with u Chris cuz ur girl is slightly retarted lol.not really but i feel like it sometimes for thinking that but hey,its the truth.i dunno.Its crossed my mind a few times.Maybe becuz even if i'm not trying to i dream of us being together like literally Years down the road and i love how things are now so i guess i kinda wonder what it would be like if i found out that he was the one or if i knew that i wouldnt have to let him go someday.I could just be selfish too.Just curiousity i suppose.Its no biggie but i did have to mention that i sometimes do think about it.I dunno if that makes me weird or if he'll run screaming but i suppose if i'm weird i'm weird and if he'll run screaming then so be it but its my thoughts and it is only a thought.i'm not planning a wedding or anyhing guys.I think i'll pass on that for several more years.so there u have it.