23: [Closed Commentlog // Audio, Locked 40% to Hiccup] [BACKDATED to 10-15-10]

[withanokka]

[Sokka had been gathering pink markers for Toph out of one of his junk suitcases when he heard Jim's voice on ShipNET. It was nothing out of the ordinary, the normal kind of prattle-- at least, until the conversation continued.And Azula's voice came on, mentioning his name

Comments

[believeslegends]

[Jim's life? Sucks pretty badly right now. Not only had Azula succeeded in taunting him to the point of not caring about a fight, but she'd gotten him into the one place he was legitimately afraid of, immobilized him with more practiced chi-blocking techniques, and beaten and burned him to hell and back.

Yeah. Jim's life sucks about now. And the sad thing is, he knows it's his own fault. He'd lost, badly; he really couldn't pick his fights. So it doesn't make the burns and the heat and the excruciatingly painful breathing any better.

He winces when he hears the door and tries to stay calm until he hears the voice calling for him. When did-- Oh. Right, he'd been recording the whole thing. Maybe he did have some gift of foresight occasionally. But God, just breathing hurt, let alone trying to move to sit up. Okay, so maybe Sokka could forgive him this one time for not getting up to greet him. His voice is almost breathless.]

H-hey...

[withanokka]

I heard it, I heard, I ran as fast as I could, I should have taken the stupid stairs, the elevator was a dumb decision, I'm sorry--

[All the words just tumble out and he has to fight to think again. Who can he take him to? Can Katara heal this? He looks... awful, there's no way... AMU, they could go to AMU, the robot thing could help.]

Can I move you? I'm gonna carry you to AMU. We're... we're gonna get you patched up, Jim, we're going to get that thing to heal you. This is beyond Katara, I don't-- I don't know how she could possibly...

[believeslegends]

[The waiting between Azula leaving and Sokka coming had given Jim a few minutes to try and calm himself down and he'd finally done that, been okay with his Big, Big Screw-Up, but Sokka freaking out was bringing the fear back. Way to go, Sokka.

Still. He had to admit, that was one particular lie Azula told he was glad wasn't true. He takes a shaky breath and looks at Sokka; he's tired, why are you making him talk.]

...I screwed up. M'sorry.

[withanokka]

[Sokka pales even more, extra fear gripping him. Jim, you didn't answer his question. That, more than anything, makes him worry. His hands are starting to shake, he hates it in here.]

No, no, it's okay, it--

[He heard the whole conversation, he knows Jim shouldn't've taken off after her, but.... he'd done the same thing, once.]

I would have-- I'd've done it too, it's okay, it's fine. I'll... beat you up over it later, after we get you to AMU, come on, where doesn't it hurt? So I can get you up and going. I'll carry you.

[He's repeating himself, but he doesn't realize it yet.]

[believeslegends]

[Whatever breathing Jim could do is starting to get more lax the longer he lay there; fewer, slower, eerily calmer. Eyes harder to keep open, questions longer to process. He's quiet a few minutes while he tries to think; what part of him wasn't hurting was a hard one to answer. And in the end, he can't. Jim can't feel a single part of him that isn't hurting somewhere. But he does notice Sokka's shaking and just... That makes him feel so much better about this.]

...Y'houldn't've come here...

[withanokka]

W-why wouldn't I come here? Jim...

[His voice is pitchy, worried-- the panic is wearing off and he's starting to dread. Jim's not doing well-- and that's an understatement.

It was only in hindsight that Sokka ever realized that Toph had been dead before he'd ever tried to save her back then. He was too late, then. Watching Jim now, he could feel it-- his instincts screaming at him, telling him things he knew and didn't want to know.

There was no way Jim could make it.

His voice drops low, his tactic changes-- he doesn't know what to do other than to shift closer, doesn't know what to say, at least, not at first.]

Don't... don't talk, okay? Just... try to breathe.

[He hates this, he hates it, he hates it so much. If he were born a waterbender like his sister, he could do something. If he were braver, he could do something like... end Jim's suffering, or-- NO, not that thought, that's too gruesome, he's not even brave enough to think about a thing like that-- ending Jim's suffering, what was he even thinking

[believeslegends]

[He hears you, Sokka. He really does, but since when is he ever one to listen? He can only stand this music for so long. And he feels like he has to answer Sokka's question.]

...'Ca-cause... we're friends.

[The thought makes him smile a little, or the hint of one anyway. He finally closes his eyes and lets the smile fade with a slow exhale.]

I'm sorry. [Sorry for making his friend come here at all. Sorry for doing something so stupid when he knew better. He was an idiot. Is an idiot. He wants to get up and let Sokka hit him, maybe knock some sense into him. But that would mean getting up and he really... doesn't think he could even if he had to now. The breathing that had been so slow and quiet finally calmed to a stop.]

[withanokka]

[Sokka thinks his own breathing might have ceased. For the air to be so devoid of sound beyond the sick lullaby of the carousel some ways into Carnival is unnerving enough, but knowing what that silence actually means-- a chill runs down his spine, and he's not entirely aware of the tears on his cheeks, even as they drop onto his pants and the dirt.

He's so still.

He's so still.

He shakes his head minutely, finding his breath again, his breath coming in weak, quiet, stuttering gasps. The logical part of his head tells him that he'll be back, he'll revive, he'll be okay, he'll be alive, but...

He'll be dead for twenty-four hours, and that's twenty-four hours too long. Sokka slumps forward, a sob wracking his frame, and there's nothing else in his mind-- just Jim, just grief, just-- a memory, barely a month ago now:

"I'm not going anywhere."]

You were supposed to keep that promise, Jim.

[It's not the same as him leaving forever, but he doesn't care, it doesn't matter, not in this instant.]

[talkingfishbone]

[No matter how hard he ran, he'd knew he'd be too late. That didn't mean he didn't put in his all getting there. There has been a lot of running in Hiccup's life, but this feels like the hardest and longest he's ever worked to keep his legs moving. He's lost count of how many times he's tripped and lost time.

The doors to Carnival are ridiculous heavy and he hates them. Not because his friends are on the other side, possibly dead or dying. Not because Sokka died there at one point.

Because they are Heavy and He is Not and this is just More Time Wasted.

...oh gods, they're just inside the door.

Hiccup takes the step or two that puts him out of the door and stand stock still until it slams shut behind him. Then he jumps...and suddenly can breathe again. And realizes he really needed to breathe.

He tries to get out his question through his gasping, but all that comes out are pathetic half-syllables.

Was he really too late?]

[withanokka]

[Sokka startles and whips around at the sound of the door slamming shut-- even in the washed-out light in Carnival, the tears on his face shine plain as day. He knows he looks ridiculous, he doesn't care, it doesn't matter.

He can't even look at Hiccup. His eyes fall back on Jim's still form.

Spirits, it really looks like he's sleeping.]

I was... I was too late. I... I couldn't do anything for him.

[talkingfishbone]

[The teen's eyes flutter, his breathing growing more ragged as his friend's words sink in.

He knew it. He knew he'd be too late.

Hiccup wants to curl up around the corpse and cry. He wants to run away and forget this ever happened. He wants his father.

Gods, does he want his dad.

Stumbling back against the doors, Hiccup lets out a high, scared whine. He doesn't want this to happen, and by Gods there's nothing he can do. Jim'll be back, but this will still have happened. He still died.

He closes his eyes, fists to his head. The whine gets louder, forceful until he's just yelling out his frustrations. He's trying stupidly hard not to cry.]

[withanokka]

[Sokka, similarly just wants to curl in on himself and he knows he can't. Not here. Carnival isn't safe

[talkingfishbone]

[He can't look at him, so Hiccup turns and leans against the doors. The yells keep coming, lasting until his voice goes ragged and he tapers them off into nasal squeaks. He yells open mouthed. He yells through his teeth. He pounds the ugly door.

He drops into a squat and yells, bent over his legs.

It's not really helping, but he feels like it should.]

[withanokka]

[The earring finally gives, the clasp unhooking and sliding free of Jim's ear. It's a tiny victory in and of itself, a-- it was something. It was anything. Sokka was happy to find some kind of silver lining in anything, especially when there shouldn't be one.

He pockets the knife and clutches the earring and the map together in one hand. Sokka doesn't want to leave Jim, but his body will vanish soon enough. He lingers for a few moments longer before crossing over to Hiccup and tugging at his elbow.]

We... we've gotta get out of here, Hiccup.

[At any other time, he would be shocked to discover he doesn't recognize his own voice.]