meh
I haven't written in for-ever here. I keep trying but then I lose focus.. But before I go off on a tangent about what has been happening in my life, I will just get straight to the point of why I am writing now.
And that point is...
I was just told (yet again) that I should start looking at people in a "what can I get out of this person" perspective. Apparently, again, the standards I hold myself to in social situations are too high for me to hold others to and I should "lower the bar".
This depresses me greatly and makes me not want to bother with people. Not want to make/have friends. Not want to have lasting, meaningful relationships...
Then again, at the same time, the person who keeps telling me this is what I need to do is a person with a degree in psychology, doesn't bother with having friends outside of me and seems to be miserable 99% of the time.
I honestly don't know what to do. On the one hand, it bothers me that I am completely blown off when I do anything the people I call my 'friends' ask and then they are never around when I need them. On the other hand, I don't want to be just another person who is only interested in what they can get out of someone.
I don't want to be used but I don't want to be alone either.
And I really don't feel up to comments.
And that point is...
I was just told (yet again) that I should start looking at people in a "what can I get out of this person" perspective. Apparently, again, the standards I hold myself to in social situations are too high for me to hold others to and I should "lower the bar".
This depresses me greatly and makes me not want to bother with people. Not want to make/have friends. Not want to have lasting, meaningful relationships...
Then again, at the same time, the person who keeps telling me this is what I need to do is a person with a degree in psychology, doesn't bother with having friends outside of me and seems to be miserable 99% of the time.
I honestly don't know what to do. On the one hand, it bothers me that I am completely blown off when I do anything the people I call my 'friends' ask and then they are never around when I need them. On the other hand, I don't want to be just another person who is only interested in what they can get out of someone.
I don't want to be used but I don't want to be alone either.
And I really don't feel up to comments.