(no subject)
Thoughts racing, my mind is going to explode. This way or that. It's too much. I try to hide, but all of a sudden there is attention, attention, attention. I try to wipe the lone tear but I just let it roll down my cheek. They don't notice. I take the razor, I make it deep. It hurts for days but it is such sweet relief. It's all okay, my mind is empty the numb is there. The thoughts creep back in. Who are you? Why? What? Where? How? How dare you? You don't deserve this. Devote yourself never take their time. You crave their touch, their time, their attention. You deny yourself it all. Punish, punish, never let them in. No one can hurt you as much as you will hurt yourself. They let you down, you let yourself down a little harder. Why, how did this start. Just keep moving, never stop. Don't have time to breathe. If you think, if you have peace it may all come crashing down. Go. Go. Move. Move.