rubychan05: Uti, Utor Part Two (Jack/John Smith, Ten/Jack) [R]
Title: Uti, Utor
Author: RubyChan05
Rating: R
Spoilers: Up to Human Nature/The Family Of Blood
Warnings: Potential non-con, depending on how you look at it
Summary: When Jack meets John, everything changes
Notes: Inspired by a fanvid I made ages ago....found HERE, and the ripped out pages in the journal seen around the gas mask people pages when Nurse Redfern read it
Part One
Things are awkward between the two for a few days, and Jack isn’t blind to the way John starts spending more time with Nurse Redfern, as if attempting to reaffirm any lost masculinity and rub Jack’s failure in his face. Except that John would never be callous enough to do the latter, and Jack knows that. Which somehow, in its own peculiar fashion, makes it just hurt more.
Jack hadn’t realised quite how much time he spent with the other man until they were estranged, and he passes his spare time in his room, reading books from the school library, left alone by the other teachers. He’s never quite gelled with the other members of staff, either because of his fictional relation to the investor or simply because he just clicked with John straight away and didn’t really bother working on his relationships with the other teachers. In his lowest moments he finds himself regretting that now, but nowhere near as much as he regrets scaring away the lifeline he found in John.
On the sixth day after the incident John corners him after class, and after a painfully stilted conversation a mutual agreement is made not to speak of what happened between them ever again. No words are spoken, but John’s eyes say everything he needs to, which is why Jack finds himself leaving for the pub for the first time in an age.
It’s scarily easy to pick up from where he left off after Torchwood found him, and the moment the cheap ale hits the back of his throat Jack is gone, downing drink after drink with no purpose other than to get himself drunk out of his mind. By the time the pub closes Jack is already warming the local slut’s bed, and he stumbles back to the school in the early hours of the morning, bleary eyes bloodshot as he attempts to teach later on in the day.
John’s gaze is disapproving, and Jack can’t shake the feeling that his friend knows what he was doing. But even though it makes him feel ashamed, it doesn’t stop him doing it again.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Everything changes again when John happens to catch him during one of his little trysts behind the pub. And yes, it probably wasn’t a good idea to choose a public place in the middle of one of the most homophobic decades to be grinding against the only man in the village brave enough to take what he wants, but Jack couldn’t help himself and Samuel has one of the prettiest mouths he’s ever seen.
He’s kissing it when John rounds the corner with Nurse Redfern, their expressions shocked and frozen in place as if they’d expected to break apart some sort of fight, not find Jack doing unspeakable acts with another man. And his shirt is unbuttoned, Samuel’s hands stroking bare skin underneath even as his own hands grip the other’s ass to pull him closer, and Jack knows that there’s no way he can explain all this away.
He looks at the disgust on Nurse Redfern’s face, and thinks of the well documented Labouchere Amedment which he memorised after getting stuck on the slow path, so afraid that any mistakes he made would get him into trouble he couldn’t get out of.
"Any male person who, in public or private, commits, or is a party to the commission of, or procures, or attempts to procure the commission by any male person of, any act of gross indecency shall be guilty of misdemeanour, and being convicted shall be liable at the discretion of the Court to be imprisoned for any term not exceeding two years, with or without hard labour."
If she has her way tonight, Jack knows she’ll call the police on them and he and Samuel will be thrown into separate cells, ready to be sent off to the nearest prison tomorrow morning first thing. Torchwood will be furious with him for ruining the mission, and he’ll be paying for it for the next few years. Samuel shivers against him, hiding his face in Jack’s shoulder, and Nurse Redfern scowls, eyes narrowed. Her horrified expression speaks volumes about the era she was raised in, but it’s the look on John’s face that keeps Jack’s attention.
The way his mouth has fallen slightly open, lips parted as if longing to kiss…eyes dark with more than just casual interest…
A pink tongue flicks over his lower lip, and Jack watches as John shudders and shuts his eyes, desire and upbringing clearly warring with each other. He looks torn between hunger and discomfort, and Jack wishes he could just kiss him right now, show him that it’s alright to give in to his feelings.
“I should have guessed there was something funny about you, Mr Harkness…” Redfern breathes, and her eyes blaze fire. “The way you didn’t seriously pursue any of the village girls even when they went all giggly over you…I thought you were just against settling down, but to find that you’re…it sickens me”
John jerks, turning to look at her with wide eyes.
“Matron, I don’t think…”
“Mr Smith, he’s teaching young boys. Young, impressionable boys who he could very easily take advantage of!” She pleads, and John glances at Jack with brown, uncertain eyes.
“I find it hard to believe that Mr Harkness could be capable of that.” He says solemnly, and Jack breathes a sigh of intense relief.
“I’m not, I assure you.” He says in a rush. “They’re underage, the sons of men who make more money in a day than I do in a year, and I can honestly tell you that the idea of taking advantage of anyone that young makes me feel ill.”
The last line’s a blatant lie - he’s taken more than one person’s virginity over the years - but he hopes the other two don’t know that.
Nurse Redfern hesitates, and Mr Smith sighs, taking her hand in his and looking her in the eye.
“Mr Harkness is an honest, hard working member of our staff who has never put a foot wrong before now. I can’t pretend that seeing this hasn’t…disturbed…me, but shouldn’t we just pretend this never happened?” He asks quietly, and after a few tense moments she nods reluctantly, looking away.
“Very well. But at the first sign of trouble I’m calling the police - I have the boys’ welfare to worry about, after all.”
John nods, smiling faintly, and with a last glance at Jack leads her away, no doubt escorting her back to the school since the night’s events would have disturbed her far too much to even think about continuing on with their night’s drink. Samuel swallows hard against him, body thrumming with tension, and with a regretful final kiss he turns and runs, leaving Jack aching.
He arrives back at school half an hour later, hard and desperate for the touch of his own hand. As soon as he reaches his room he plans to lock the door and spend some quality time in his bed, think about Samuel’s pouting lips and John’s needy gaze.
When he touches his door it swings inwards however, and he silently curses whoever’s decided tonight would be a good night to speak to him. He enters with a barbed comment on the tip of his tongue, polite conventions be damned, and freezes when he sees John standing in the middle of the room, hat in hand and face full of despair.
“John?” Instinct has him locking the door behind him; if John notices, he doesn’t say anything.
“Jack, I…” John swallows, dropping his hat in favour of running his hands through his hair in distress, leaving it sticking up and wild. His eyes are tortured when they finally lift, and Jack’s across the room in an instant, pulling him close and hoping that John misses the erection he’s still sporting.
“It’s alright to feel the way you do.” He says fiercely, just somehow knowing what John’s panicking about. “It’s fine…it doesn’t make you any less of a man to get excited over other men.”
John lets out a small whimper and Jack’s heart breaks a little. He remembers that first night with Algy, a wartime fling with a soldier distressed to find he wasn’t as straight as he first thought, and does what he did then.
“Jack? What are you…” John’s voice is trembling, uncertain as Jack guides him over to sit on the bed and sinks to his knees in front of him. Jack doesn’t say anything, just leans forward to nuzzle at the slowly tenting cloth, mouthing the fabric almost drunkenly. John chokes, frozen and vibrating with terrified need, and Jack rubs a hand soothingly over his leg even as he unbuttons John’s trousers, reaching inside to retrieve his prize.
“J-ack…” John almost sobs as Jack swallows him whole, arching upwards with hips thrusting desperately enough to have choked any other person. Except that Jack’s given more blowjobs than he’s had hot dinners, ocasionally in order to get those hot dinners, and he knows exactly what he’s doing as he relaxes his throat and sinks even lower.
John’s inexperienced, overwhelmed, and it all ends too fast for Jack’s liking. He pulls off and licks his lips, tastes John on them, and smiles at the panting, shell shocked man before him.
“See?” He whispers, unbuttoning his own trousers and letting his hand slip inside. “Being with guys can feel good too.”
He’s taken by surprise when John slides to the floor and grips him in his own hand, but as the world goes white and Jack finds safety in John’s lips, he can’t help but think it’s a welcome one.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
John freaks out and won’t talk to Jack the next day, but Jack is patient this time and sure enough John apologises meekly the day after, admitting his attraction and pleading for Jack to make the world make sense.
Life becomes a whirlwind of keeping their trysts secret, of teaching John everything he should know about himself, and even though they never get beyond hand-jobs and blowjobs, Jack can’t help but think that somehow this is the best sex he’s had.
He finds himself oddly jealous of Nurse Redfern as John continues to woo her, the man seemingly content to tell Jack he loves him in private but virtually announce his intentions towards Nurse Redfern to the rest of the world. Jack doesn’t do jealousy; not since Rose and the Doctor has he felt that hot clenching rage that comes with seeing someone you care about with someone else, but John’s different.
John’s always been different.
The days pass without event, and even though Jack knows that this will all have to end when whatever is going to happen goes down here he still finds himself entertaining thoughts of what life would be like if he just took a break for a while and lived out John’s mortal life with him.
John’s given him a reason to enjoy life again, a reason to hope and dream and do all the thousands of things he found himself unable to do after the Doctor abandoned him, and that’s why it hurts so much when he finally discovers the truth.
It all starts out innocently enough; John shyly offers to show him the journal he keeps of his dreams, and Jack is awed by the trust it implies, almost falling over himself in his eagerness to catch a glimpse of the world inside John’s head.
But when he takes the book back to his own room and sits in bed reading it, it’s with a sense of horror that grows with every further word he sees.
Daleks. A planet that burns to save a universe. Cybermen and Slitheen.
Another life is set down on these pages, carefully written in an elegant flowing hand that almost hides the ugly truth behind the words. And even though Jack already knows who the only person who would have this life could be, he can’t help the bitter, choking laugh that escapes as he turns the page to see Rose staring out at him from smudged, haunted eyes.
It’s so terribly ironic that the only person who could make him want to live again is the Doctor in human form, and Jack curses his heart for being stupid enough to fall in love with the same man twice.
It’s small consolation that John…the Doctor…John cared enough to remember Jack, to set down his story on thick paper and even take the time to sketch him over the top of the descriptions of a cocky man who could charm the birds out of the trees. Jack shuts his eyes as he rips those pages out, knows without thinking too hard that they’ll end up in his pack when he steals away later.
He manhandles John into bed that night and forces him to submit, ignoring John’s shaky protests in favour of dominating someone who has remained out of his reach for so long. It’s rough, almost brutal, and when he comes with the Doctor’s name on his lips John is sobbing in pain, brown eyes blind and unseeing.
It hits Jack hard, makes him almost sick with what he’s done, and its with trembling hands that he puts the memory loss drug Torchwood’s experimenting with in John’s tea and urges John to drink up, apologising over and over. He leaves as soon as John is asleep, just packs up and goes with only a note left behind to tell them he’s off to seek his fortune elsewhere and to express his regret to Mr Smith for not being able to say goodbye.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Retcon doesn’t work on Time Lords.
At the end of the universe he dies over and over in a small room flooded with radiation, and the Doctor watches it all with a grim heart and steel eyes.
Author: RubyChan05
Rating: R
Spoilers: Up to Human Nature/The Family Of Blood
Warnings: Potential non-con, depending on how you look at it
Summary: When Jack meets John, everything changes
Notes: Inspired by a fanvid I made ages ago....found HERE, and the ripped out pages in the journal seen around the gas mask people pages when Nurse Redfern read it
Part One
Things are awkward between the two for a few days, and Jack isn’t blind to the way John starts spending more time with Nurse Redfern, as if attempting to reaffirm any lost masculinity and rub Jack’s failure in his face. Except that John would never be callous enough to do the latter, and Jack knows that. Which somehow, in its own peculiar fashion, makes it just hurt more.
Jack hadn’t realised quite how much time he spent with the other man until they were estranged, and he passes his spare time in his room, reading books from the school library, left alone by the other teachers. He’s never quite gelled with the other members of staff, either because of his fictional relation to the investor or simply because he just clicked with John straight away and didn’t really bother working on his relationships with the other teachers. In his lowest moments he finds himself regretting that now, but nowhere near as much as he regrets scaring away the lifeline he found in John.
On the sixth day after the incident John corners him after class, and after a painfully stilted conversation a mutual agreement is made not to speak of what happened between them ever again. No words are spoken, but John’s eyes say everything he needs to, which is why Jack finds himself leaving for the pub for the first time in an age.
It’s scarily easy to pick up from where he left off after Torchwood found him, and the moment the cheap ale hits the back of his throat Jack is gone, downing drink after drink with no purpose other than to get himself drunk out of his mind. By the time the pub closes Jack is already warming the local slut’s bed, and he stumbles back to the school in the early hours of the morning, bleary eyes bloodshot as he attempts to teach later on in the day.
John’s gaze is disapproving, and Jack can’t shake the feeling that his friend knows what he was doing. But even though it makes him feel ashamed, it doesn’t stop him doing it again.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Everything changes again when John happens to catch him during one of his little trysts behind the pub. And yes, it probably wasn’t a good idea to choose a public place in the middle of one of the most homophobic decades to be grinding against the only man in the village brave enough to take what he wants, but Jack couldn’t help himself and Samuel has one of the prettiest mouths he’s ever seen.
He’s kissing it when John rounds the corner with Nurse Redfern, their expressions shocked and frozen in place as if they’d expected to break apart some sort of fight, not find Jack doing unspeakable acts with another man. And his shirt is unbuttoned, Samuel’s hands stroking bare skin underneath even as his own hands grip the other’s ass to pull him closer, and Jack knows that there’s no way he can explain all this away.
He looks at the disgust on Nurse Redfern’s face, and thinks of the well documented Labouchere Amedment which he memorised after getting stuck on the slow path, so afraid that any mistakes he made would get him into trouble he couldn’t get out of.
"Any male person who, in public or private, commits, or is a party to the commission of, or procures, or attempts to procure the commission by any male person of, any act of gross indecency shall be guilty of misdemeanour, and being convicted shall be liable at the discretion of the Court to be imprisoned for any term not exceeding two years, with or without hard labour."
If she has her way tonight, Jack knows she’ll call the police on them and he and Samuel will be thrown into separate cells, ready to be sent off to the nearest prison tomorrow morning first thing. Torchwood will be furious with him for ruining the mission, and he’ll be paying for it for the next few years. Samuel shivers against him, hiding his face in Jack’s shoulder, and Nurse Redfern scowls, eyes narrowed. Her horrified expression speaks volumes about the era she was raised in, but it’s the look on John’s face that keeps Jack’s attention.
The way his mouth has fallen slightly open, lips parted as if longing to kiss…eyes dark with more than just casual interest…
A pink tongue flicks over his lower lip, and Jack watches as John shudders and shuts his eyes, desire and upbringing clearly warring with each other. He looks torn between hunger and discomfort, and Jack wishes he could just kiss him right now, show him that it’s alright to give in to his feelings.
“I should have guessed there was something funny about you, Mr Harkness…” Redfern breathes, and her eyes blaze fire. “The way you didn’t seriously pursue any of the village girls even when they went all giggly over you…I thought you were just against settling down, but to find that you’re…it sickens me”
John jerks, turning to look at her with wide eyes.
“Matron, I don’t think…”
“Mr Smith, he’s teaching young boys. Young, impressionable boys who he could very easily take advantage of!” She pleads, and John glances at Jack with brown, uncertain eyes.
“I find it hard to believe that Mr Harkness could be capable of that.” He says solemnly, and Jack breathes a sigh of intense relief.
“I’m not, I assure you.” He says in a rush. “They’re underage, the sons of men who make more money in a day than I do in a year, and I can honestly tell you that the idea of taking advantage of anyone that young makes me feel ill.”
The last line’s a blatant lie - he’s taken more than one person’s virginity over the years - but he hopes the other two don’t know that.
Nurse Redfern hesitates, and Mr Smith sighs, taking her hand in his and looking her in the eye.
“Mr Harkness is an honest, hard working member of our staff who has never put a foot wrong before now. I can’t pretend that seeing this hasn’t…disturbed…me, but shouldn’t we just pretend this never happened?” He asks quietly, and after a few tense moments she nods reluctantly, looking away.
“Very well. But at the first sign of trouble I’m calling the police - I have the boys’ welfare to worry about, after all.”
John nods, smiling faintly, and with a last glance at Jack leads her away, no doubt escorting her back to the school since the night’s events would have disturbed her far too much to even think about continuing on with their night’s drink. Samuel swallows hard against him, body thrumming with tension, and with a regretful final kiss he turns and runs, leaving Jack aching.
He arrives back at school half an hour later, hard and desperate for the touch of his own hand. As soon as he reaches his room he plans to lock the door and spend some quality time in his bed, think about Samuel’s pouting lips and John’s needy gaze.
When he touches his door it swings inwards however, and he silently curses whoever’s decided tonight would be a good night to speak to him. He enters with a barbed comment on the tip of his tongue, polite conventions be damned, and freezes when he sees John standing in the middle of the room, hat in hand and face full of despair.
“John?” Instinct has him locking the door behind him; if John notices, he doesn’t say anything.
“Jack, I…” John swallows, dropping his hat in favour of running his hands through his hair in distress, leaving it sticking up and wild. His eyes are tortured when they finally lift, and Jack’s across the room in an instant, pulling him close and hoping that John misses the erection he’s still sporting.
“It’s alright to feel the way you do.” He says fiercely, just somehow knowing what John’s panicking about. “It’s fine…it doesn’t make you any less of a man to get excited over other men.”
John lets out a small whimper and Jack’s heart breaks a little. He remembers that first night with Algy, a wartime fling with a soldier distressed to find he wasn’t as straight as he first thought, and does what he did then.
“Jack? What are you…” John’s voice is trembling, uncertain as Jack guides him over to sit on the bed and sinks to his knees in front of him. Jack doesn’t say anything, just leans forward to nuzzle at the slowly tenting cloth, mouthing the fabric almost drunkenly. John chokes, frozen and vibrating with terrified need, and Jack rubs a hand soothingly over his leg even as he unbuttons John’s trousers, reaching inside to retrieve his prize.
“J-ack…” John almost sobs as Jack swallows him whole, arching upwards with hips thrusting desperately enough to have choked any other person. Except that Jack’s given more blowjobs than he’s had hot dinners, ocasionally in order to get those hot dinners, and he knows exactly what he’s doing as he relaxes his throat and sinks even lower.
John’s inexperienced, overwhelmed, and it all ends too fast for Jack’s liking. He pulls off and licks his lips, tastes John on them, and smiles at the panting, shell shocked man before him.
“See?” He whispers, unbuttoning his own trousers and letting his hand slip inside. “Being with guys can feel good too.”
He’s taken by surprise when John slides to the floor and grips him in his own hand, but as the world goes white and Jack finds safety in John’s lips, he can’t help but think it’s a welcome one.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
John freaks out and won’t talk to Jack the next day, but Jack is patient this time and sure enough John apologises meekly the day after, admitting his attraction and pleading for Jack to make the world make sense.
Life becomes a whirlwind of keeping their trysts secret, of teaching John everything he should know about himself, and even though they never get beyond hand-jobs and blowjobs, Jack can’t help but think that somehow this is the best sex he’s had.
He finds himself oddly jealous of Nurse Redfern as John continues to woo her, the man seemingly content to tell Jack he loves him in private but virtually announce his intentions towards Nurse Redfern to the rest of the world. Jack doesn’t do jealousy; not since Rose and the Doctor has he felt that hot clenching rage that comes with seeing someone you care about with someone else, but John’s different.
John’s always been different.
The days pass without event, and even though Jack knows that this will all have to end when whatever is going to happen goes down here he still finds himself entertaining thoughts of what life would be like if he just took a break for a while and lived out John’s mortal life with him.
John’s given him a reason to enjoy life again, a reason to hope and dream and do all the thousands of things he found himself unable to do after the Doctor abandoned him, and that’s why it hurts so much when he finally discovers the truth.
It all starts out innocently enough; John shyly offers to show him the journal he keeps of his dreams, and Jack is awed by the trust it implies, almost falling over himself in his eagerness to catch a glimpse of the world inside John’s head.
But when he takes the book back to his own room and sits in bed reading it, it’s with a sense of horror that grows with every further word he sees.
Daleks. A planet that burns to save a universe. Cybermen and Slitheen.
Another life is set down on these pages, carefully written in an elegant flowing hand that almost hides the ugly truth behind the words. And even though Jack already knows who the only person who would have this life could be, he can’t help the bitter, choking laugh that escapes as he turns the page to see Rose staring out at him from smudged, haunted eyes.
It’s so terribly ironic that the only person who could make him want to live again is the Doctor in human form, and Jack curses his heart for being stupid enough to fall in love with the same man twice.
It’s small consolation that John…the Doctor…John cared enough to remember Jack, to set down his story on thick paper and even take the time to sketch him over the top of the descriptions of a cocky man who could charm the birds out of the trees. Jack shuts his eyes as he rips those pages out, knows without thinking too hard that they’ll end up in his pack when he steals away later.
He manhandles John into bed that night and forces him to submit, ignoring John’s shaky protests in favour of dominating someone who has remained out of his reach for so long. It’s rough, almost brutal, and when he comes with the Doctor’s name on his lips John is sobbing in pain, brown eyes blind and unseeing.
It hits Jack hard, makes him almost sick with what he’s done, and its with trembling hands that he puts the memory loss drug Torchwood’s experimenting with in John’s tea and urges John to drink up, apologising over and over. He leaves as soon as John is asleep, just packs up and goes with only a note left behind to tell them he’s off to seek his fortune elsewhere and to express his regret to Mr Smith for not being able to say goodbye.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Retcon doesn’t work on Time Lords.
At the end of the universe he dies over and over in a small room flooded with radiation, and the Doctor watches it all with a grim heart and steel eyes.